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MontagueLongfellow Posted on 20/4 13:55
Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Well not really but sort of, theres a girl works in our offices that I may be reading the wrong signals about but I'm not sure I'm wrong about. Whenever I leave my office and am in a communal part of the building she always seems to appear and strikes up a conversation usually quite an innocent topic to begin with such as footy or holidays but then seems to get a little more suggestive and she becomes very touchy feely but does so in a humerous manner.

Now then, although I'm not directly her boss I am a member of the senior management team, I'm presently single but I'm not sure if it's right for me to reciprocate the attention she's giving me, she's rather attractive and quite a bit younger than me too.

The other thing that's in the back of my mind is that she could using me to enhance her career as I'm not sure why she would be interested in me otherwise as this has never happened before (at work with a fair sized age gap)

Now then, theres a leaving do tonight and she's been going out of her way to find out if I'm going, I know this as a colleague mentioned my name amongst others had cropped up when she was talking to him about it and she has asked me directly myself at least once a day making little jokes about saving a dance and so on.

Do I steer clear or should I go along and see what develops, I've got about an hour or so to decide, your thoughts would be helpfull.

Cheers

mickbrown Posted on 20/4 13:57
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Fill your boots

Mattyk50 Posted on 20/4 13:58
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

just do what you did at school... trip her up and pull her hair

The_Commisar Posted on 20/4 13:59
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

You need to protect yourself, ensure that anywhere she talks to you, your covered by a CCTV camera, that way when she jumps on you, performs filthy degrading sexual acts on you, she cannot claim you forced her.


It has the added bonus you can sell the tape of said disgusting acts on the internet and make a fortune.

Mattyk50 Posted on 20/4 13:59
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

do you take paypal?

gatenby Posted on 20/4 14:00
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

I would go along with it mate. If she seems the type of person to be flirty all the time, then think twice. But if shes not like she is with you with other people at work, then id say go for it.

Just see what happens, let her do most of the work and see where you are then.

Get_your_rat_out Posted on 20/4 14:01
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

tell her to get her rat out, if she does, then you know.......... well you wont kno much apart from she gets her rat out on command, but still rat's rat

danboro0902 Posted on 20/4 14:01
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Just be cautious

The_Commisar Posted on 20/4 14:01
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

make sure you check back with the board so we can advise you further, we need important deatils such as the brand and colour of her thong, just where (exactly) was she pierced etc etc etc

OhWell Posted on 20/4 14:02
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

A picture speaks a thousand words.

NOT SAFE FOR WORK

NSFW! NSFW! NSFW! NSFW! NSFW! NSFW! NSFW! NSFW! NSFW!

copy/paste >> http://home.tiscali.be/cartoo/Nema4/just%20do%20it.jpg

NSFW! NSFW! NSFW! NSFW! NSFW! NSFW! NSFW! NSFW! NSFW!


I've deliberately not linked it, so if you go out of your way to view it after my warning, don't cry about it if you are offended/sacked.

(view it quick before admin remove it :)

tony_block19 Posted on 20/4 14:04
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

"rats rat"



Thats a new one on me.

the_broken_fridge Posted on 20/4 14:04
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

and then you woke up and had to get ready for work...


seriously, go for it.

expat_boro Posted on 20/4 14:05
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

It wouldn't stop me from going,you can always decide after a few drinks.You can always have the "i was pissed excuse" then!

Get_your_rat_out Posted on 20/4 14:07
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

well may aswell get it while you can tony, at end of the day every hole's a goal, and if she aint the best lookin, well you dont look at the mantle piece when pokin the fire do you!

Spoff_MFC Posted on 20/4 14:09
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

As long as you don't do anything in the workplace I am sure you will be fine.

Lefty3668 Posted on 20/4 14:09
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Is she fit?

VodkaByName Posted on 20/4 14:11
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

A leaving do tonight.........

So you're not taking in the game then, shame on you.....

Football comes first and the young bit a stuff should know that early on should things develop........

tony_block19 Posted on 20/4 14:11
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

"well you dont look at the mantle piece when pokin the fire do you!"


Boro85 Posted on 20/4 14:11
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

"theres a leaving do tonight"

Bare in mind theres the footy on tv tonight, so youve got a get out clause if it goes wrong early enough (before kickoff).

Reverand_Black_Grape Posted on 20/4 14:13
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

My mate Hagen sexually harrasses himself upto 3 tims a shift at corus.....You know who you are !!

bandito Posted on 20/4 14:14
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

ask her to photocpy her lals as proof that you are guaranteed sausage action later on. If she bottles it, forget about it. You'll be sat at a table talking about her ex boyfriend all night, and besides what the fook are you doing going out tonight, dont you know there's a match on

tony_block19 Posted on 20/4 14:17
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Take her back to yours, get her on all fours and then tear her a new one, whilst also watching the match.

Best of both worlds.

Get_your_rat_out Posted on 20/4 14:19
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

or go home and knock one out, your choice!

blotonthelandscape Posted on 20/4 14:20
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

There are some fantasists in this world.

mufflar Posted on 20/4 14:22
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

why not skip the leaving drinks and take her out for a nice meal?

AwesomeSwells Posted on 20/4 14:22
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Steady now Monty lad: There's an old saying about romance in the workplace-
"Don't shitt where you eat".

Caution is advised.

Awesome

littlejimmy Posted on 20/4 14:25
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Blimey. You can't see for testosterone on this thread.
I mean...Phwoar....gerrin there....!

Nedkat Posted on 20/4 14:30
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Treat her with nothing but respect, and professionalism. If you don't, and you go for it, I absolutely gaurantee you will forever regret ever getting it out of your trousers.

If she carries on with the touchy feely stuff, then avoid her enough to let her know your giving her the signals that say 'I aint interested' ..

zaphod Posted on 20/4 14:31
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

If you like her, take the risk and take her out. It's pretty hard to find someone compatible so a bit of risk is justified.

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 20/4 14:31
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Good grief, I wasbn't expecting that much opinion

All seems positive that I should give it a go though, the leaving do is just a pub crawl so will start somewhere with the match on then celebrate around a few other drinking dens afterwards.

I'll go and get a coffee and if she shang hi's me I'll let her know that I'll probably be there but its my own decision not a load of internet freakos

back in 2 to 15 mins

mufflar Posted on 20/4 14:37
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

"back in 2 to 15 mins"

showing off again Monty?

Nedkat Posted on 20/4 14:38
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

I've got ten bob on the 2 minutes !!

Lefty3668 Posted on 20/4 14:41
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Look, is she fit? If so then this is obviously a career move. You should still bang her though.

mufflar Posted on 20/4 14:41
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Nedkat - so has she, with the rest of the typing pool ;-)

--- Post edited by mufflar on 20/4 14:43 ---

sasboro Posted on 20/4 14:42
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

whats the age gap between you both?

AwesomeSwells Posted on 20/4 14:43
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Not 'all' positive Monty: Check my earlier advice.

"it'll all end in tears ye know.."

Lefty3668 Posted on 20/4 14:47
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Have you considered she may have herpes

Nedkat Posted on 20/4 14:49
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Wear a condom, bend her over the Xerox machine, and if the boss walks in, tell him your trying to clear a paper jam ...

littlejimmy Posted on 20/4 14:49
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Blooming heck. First my brother tells me he's been offered it on a plate by a married woman where he works, now this. Why is everybody having more sex than me?

Get_your_rat_out Posted on 20/4 14:52
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

probly coz your called "little" jimmy??

mufflar Posted on 20/4 14:56
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

or because you live in Thirsk? ;-)

Get_your_rat_out Posted on 20/4 14:57
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

maybe your just an ugly tvvat jimmy!?

--- Post edited by Get_your_rat_out on 20/4 14:58 ---

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 20/4 14:58
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Right, back, phew.

Noted Awsome, should of said mainly positive

I think you would describe as fit Lefty, quite attractive and a nice figure Lefty

about 15 years sas

pack of three if the need arises (so to say) Ned

Well as suspected she appeared for a coffee shortly after I put the kettle on, came straight out with it, hoped I wasnt going to cry off tonight and be sat in alone with the footy when I could be out enjoying myself with them. I said I was thinking about it but they wouldn't want an old gadgie like me tagging along cramping their style and she started saying I was in good nick for my age and should go out more and that if I enjoyed tonight I might want to do it more often. So i've said I'll go.

Oh yes, I'm sharing a taxi out with her, she's picking me up.

I think I best nip into town in as bit a buy something decent to go out in, I've seen photo's of some of them on nights out and they're quite well done up.

littlejimmy Posted on 20/4 14:59
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Or maybe because I'm a fat bar-steward. Oh, I miss boroboy.

No, I know what it is: My wife's a frigid bitch.

littlejimmy Posted on 20/4 14:59
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Get yourself showered, Monty. Give the old fella a good scrub.

BTW...YOU LUCKY, LUCKY BARSTARD!

--- Post edited by littlejimmy on 20/4 15:00 ---

Get_your_rat_out Posted on 20/4 15:02
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

you gunna give her abit of length tonite montague? y'kno a long'n' in the wrong 'n'

Lefty3668 Posted on 20/4 15:03
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Good good, Monty. Remember to keep us up to speed on this, Lisbonlegend has left a bit of a void. Don't forget to give both her legs a pat.

AwesomeSwells Posted on 20/4 15:04
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Monty,
I withdraw my earlier counsel mate, as it seems on a plate.
In this instance there's only one thing for it- arise Sir Rodger de OfficePodger.

Best of Luck- hope ye've no regrets in the morning.

junior17_1985 Posted on 20/4 15:05
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

all together now.....


"GET HER RAT OUT FOR THE LADS!"

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 20/4 15:17
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Rightyo lads, early dart for me, thanks for all the advice, I shall let you know how things pan out.

I dont think I'm a "get yer rat out" on a first date type of guy tho, not that its a date, well I dont think it is anyway.

I'll get a few pics if I can but it's a bit awakward without being too obvious plus someone on here might know her which could lead to real trouble.

ta ta

Get_your_rat_out Posted on 20/4 15:20
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

if you do get a pic of her dicky can use it as a woman of the day, she'll be better than the other crap he uses

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 20/4 15:23
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

I'm certain I've got one Gyro but it might be on my home pc as I cant find it here.

MsCurly Posted on 20/4 15:37
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Just because she fancies you, doesn't mean she's the type to sleep with somebody first time out you know.

You boys are all filthy minded.

*awaits the lightning*

blotonthelandscape Posted on 20/4 15:38
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

MsC, just accept that when bloke talk about leg over 98.9% of it is carp and dreams.

--- Post edited by blotonthelandscape on 20/4 15:42 ---

Get_your_rat_out Posted on 20/4 15:40
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Were just giving our thoughts and helpful advice to montague....if that consists of filthy talk then thats what we are, plus you kno you love it curly

sasboro Posted on 20/4 15:40
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

how old are you MontagueLongfellow. i dont know whether you are 31 or 61

Nedkat Posted on 20/4 15:42
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Then again, she's made all the positive moves here .. Let us examine the reasons for this

1. She genuinely finds Monty attractive, and she'd like to get to know him better.

2. This is a career move, bed the boss, and move up the ladder.

3. She wants to fit into the company more, and thinks these nights out are good bonding exercises.

4. She's a brazen hussy, who wants to have sex, as much and as often as possible.

5. This is her genuine personality, friendly, outgoing, spunky character type.


You decide .. ?

Get_your_rat_out Posted on 20/4 15:42
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

well didnt he say there was a 15yr gap between them? lets jus hope he isnt 31!

Timesheet Posted on 20/4 15:42
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

or 13

swordtrombonefish Posted on 20/4 15:44
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

"spunky character"

Think of the context Ned, the half that was sitting on the fence has probably just come over all funny ;-)

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 20/4 15:44
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Who said anything about sleeping with her like MsC ?

Not I

neither sas, I'm 37

Get_your_rat_out Posted on 20/4 15:46
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

so she's 22? definetly after a promotion then

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 20/4 15:48
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

She might get a rise but not straight away, especially if she keeps managing to brush her leg against mine in the coffee room

jax_1 Posted on 20/4 15:49
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Well at that age Monty, it's not without the realms of possibility that she does actually fancy you.
My advice would be to just go with the flow and see what happens but don't get too pushy in case she is just trying to be good friend. Let her take the lead.

Timesheet Posted on 20/4 15:51
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Just get in there ASAP, and thats an order !

sasboro Posted on 20/4 15:53
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

you never know, she might get you pissed on alco-pops and ask if you want to see journey south

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 20/4 15:55
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Right I'm going for the day, I need get home and avoid picking something to wear that wont look like I'm ridiculously trying to look 20 years younger

I'll let you know how I got on next week

K4t0 Posted on 20/4 16:59
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

It sounds to me like she is winding you up at your own expense, go out with them and expect to be laughed at.

15 years difference??? no wonder you get the rap you lot get.

Sound advice, leave alone, or get her number and find out her true feelings towards you. It seems she has been flirting but you need to know why, is she being put up to it ? 22 is a young age to be much wiser.


Then roast her with three mates and take pictures.

keep the upper hand so to speak

And dont go out wearing chinos and a flowery shirt, they went out in 92

Nedkat Posted on 20/4 17:02
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

You let yerself down there, you were doing so well, then you had to go and let yerself down !!

boro74 Posted on 20/4 18:16
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Better than Corrie this. I can't wait for the next episode.

pskfagan Posted on 20/4 18:42
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Officially; It is only sexual harrassment if you ask her to stop and she doesn't

jaseMFC Posted on 20/4 19:19
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Give her both barrels mate !

sambaDTR Posted on 21/4 0:41
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Me dad always said: "Yer dont get yer oats where yer get yer pay.".

Ricard00 Posted on 21/4 0:48
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

pskfagan - You're wrong.

Harrassment is unwanted attention, the perp doesn;t have to be asked to stop and then continue for it to become harrassment, they just have to be taking action that makes the other party feel uncomfortable.

Smifter Posted on 21/4 0:50
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

"Rat is Rat"

That is fukin disgusting, the tone on this board gets lower everyday

onthemap Posted on 21/4 0:52
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Where's Comfy when you need him?
Jax and Curly - off this thread,its a man thing!

jax_1 Posted on 21/4 0:53
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

LOL Mappy Was just giving him the benefit of some advice

Smifter Posted on 21/4 1:45
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Montague...Im looking forward to the next chapter of this story! I thought you were female tho

SplendidStuff Posted on 21/4 1:50
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Theres a rat in me kitchen what am i gonna do?

mufflar Posted on 21/4 9:38
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

WELL???

(drums fingers in anticipation...)

tony_block19 Posted on 21/4 9:46
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Didn't he say next week???
The lads probably walking around like John Wayne this morning, after one too many lager tops and an incident including KY jelly and an Ann Summers 'Penetrator'.

VodkaByName Posted on 21/4 9:47
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

The suspense is killing me - couldn't sleep last night wondering how it had gone.........

Monty - where are you?!?!?

mufflar Posted on 21/4 9:48
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

he's either still in bed giving it six-nowt again, or he's topped himself with the shame..

tony_block19 Posted on 21/4 9:50
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

OR hes tied to the bed posts with nothing but a rather sticky feather boa covering his genitalier??

jaseMFC Posted on 21/4 10:12
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Come on..even the old Millwall fan can't take the suspense !!! Did you slip her a few inches ?? Or did she do a runner ??

mufflar Posted on 21/4 10:16
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Im now thinking Sharon Stone, Basic Instinct...

Lefty3668 Posted on 21/4 10:25
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

I am thinking that he might have done better with his choice of outfit.

jaseMFC Posted on 21/4 10:40
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

We aint heard from him yet..could be Kathy Bates..misery

mufflar Posted on 21/4 10:44
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

can someone nip round his house and see if the milk is on the step?

junior17_1985 Posted on 21/4 11:46
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

prob not she prob did the milkman instead...well he does produce more milk!

Lisbonlegend Posted on 21/4 14:26
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Good lad Monty. Play it out, that's what I say.

Fischer Posted on 21/4 15:03
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Maybe they've fallen into deep, everlasting love and decided to quit their jobs and spend the rest of their blissful lives together baking gingerbread men in a lovely cottage in the country. Good luck to them, I say.

The_Commisar Posted on 21/4 15:05
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

any one see that advert in the Herald and Post ?
"For sale, 1 liver, 2 kidneys, owner no longer needs them......."

jaseMFC Posted on 21/4 21:40
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Any news on the romance ???? or is he still in handcuffs

markwhitehead12 Posted on 22/4 0:19
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

The tone of this page is disgusting, degrading and generally down right dirty.

At this point im gonna quit my job and stay on here........its great.

So come on Monty, did you give her the high pressure vein cane?

cardiff290204 Posted on 22/4 0:20
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

One more towards the ton. Only four left now, come on and do the decent thing.

jax_1 Posted on 22/4 0:21
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Think he said he wouldn't be back til after the weekend. Spoilsport Monty

Smifter Posted on 22/4 0:22
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Its very intense..

manboobs69 Posted on 22/4 0:25
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Come on,we need a conclusion for this happy story.Has he proposed yet? Did her ex boyfiend find out? did her father find out? or did the big boss get in there first?

Smifter Posted on 22/4 0:26
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Is it love?

skid104 Posted on 22/4 0:30
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

I thought getting right to the bottom of this thread we'd have had an update!

It's almost as exciting as Hollyoaks!

Timesheet Posted on 22/4 10:24
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Has Monty been freed from the cells yet ?

Jimmys_right_shoe Posted on 23/4 19:49
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

HOOF

Smifter Posted on 24/4 2:02
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Any news?

Get_your_rat_out Posted on 24/4 9:06
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Howay Monty wheres the update!!

Timesheet Posted on 24/4 9:51
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace


Sean_Eton Posted on 24/4 10:36
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Another man going through a mid life crisis, with deluded fantasies that the office junior fancies him...get a grip man.
At your age you'll do yourself an injury.

sasboro Posted on 24/4 10:37
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

so what happened then? you cant leave this thread hanging like this

Spoff_MFC Posted on 24/4 10:46
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

The only thing that will make up for the FA Cup defeat is finding out Monty scored...

EireBoro Posted on 24/4 12:26
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Not going to let this thread slip onto the next page.

Hoof.

arkwright Posted on 24/4 13:46
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Hoof

Timesheet Posted on 24/4 14:44
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

I don't think she turned up and LL is too ashamed to reply....

sasboro Posted on 24/4 14:49
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

i suspect he had a few pints too many and stuck the lips on her infront of everyone at work and she gave him a slap and said shes not that kind of girl

Timesheet Posted on 24/4 14:59
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

and now he's on "gardening leave" from his company.

knewtz Posted on 24/4 20:07
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Gardening leave without a bush in sight. monty monty monty.

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 24/4 20:32
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Thought I'd best do an update when I saw how many people had hoofed this.

Well as I said she came round to my place to pick me up before the match in a taxi. When I jumped in the back she seemed please to see me with pecks on the cheek and taps on the knee, the sort of stuff she does at work but a little more flirty. We went to a pub near The Dickens and met up with everyone else and had a few drinks and watched the match then had a few more to drown our sorrows and headed into town and had a bit of a pub crawl from the town hall down to the station.

Now then, quite towards the end of the night she texted me saying she was in the Ladies and could I come to her rescue as the toilet door had jammed, I thought it might be a set up so I text her back saying I'd get a barmaid to go and check on her and sure enough she appeared shortly afterwards with a cheeky grin on her face.

Anyway about half an hour later I announced that the old man had had enough and was off for a taxi and she said that she's share one home as she was a bit skint and didn't want to end up getting one by herself later which seemed reasonable but after all the touchy feely stuff I started thinking that a few people on here might of been right and that I was in for a spot of passion, that was until we got to my place and I looked at her and just as I was about to proposition her she said she'd had a great time and was really glad I'd joined them and if I fancied doing it again I should call her now that I had her mobile number in my phone then leaned over and kissed me on the cheek and said goodnight and then told the taxi driver her address.

Quite lucky really, if I'd of blurted out a proposition a second earlier I could of made a right fool of myself, a close escape indeed as I'm back at work from tomorrow and it would of been a little uncomfortable to say the least.

Boris10 Posted on 24/4 20:35
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Go for it if the worst comes to the worst there's other jobs out there i cant believe you people ask these questions


If not gimme her number

parmo_army Posted on 24/4 20:35
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Boooo, hisss. I was expecting tales of a good old fashioned fisting, but alas, just a peck on the cheek.

Are you gonna get her out then, just the two of yer, she seems keen?

MsCurly Posted on 24/4 20:37
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Well it still sounds to me like she's sweet on you, monters.

Like I said earlier on in the thread though, it's a bit presumptuous to just assume she would sleep with somebody on the first time out anyway.

Do you like her, or were you merely tempted by the prospect of a bit of rumpy pumpy?

Boris10 Posted on 24/4 20:38
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Sounds like you missed out in the toilet there like mate

jd1973 Posted on 24/4 20:40
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

She tried her best with you, and you turned her down.

She now thinks you are gay.

jax_1 Posted on 24/4 20:43
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

All is not lost Monty. Give her a ring and ask if they are going out at the weekend and if so, is it ok if you tag along.

jd1973 Posted on 24/4 20:46
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

And if you do ring her this is what she'll say:

You!
I wanna take you to a gay bar,
I wanna take you to a gay bar,
I wanna take you to a gay bar, gay bar, gay bar.

sasboro Posted on 24/4 20:58
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

MontagueLongfellow, it sounds like you are heading in the right direction. i mean if she didnt like you she wouldnt suggest that you call her if you wanted to go out again as she works at the same place of you and so you see her every day anyway. if she wasnt interested then she might have just said see you at work.you could always send her a friendly text and see if she replies.

--- Post edited by sasboro on 24/4 21:11 ---

stewboss Posted on 24/4 21:03
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

you men are all dirty bastids, hubbie is sat here laughing and I'm wondering why we women bother to spend a fortune trying to look good when as one of you says "at the end of every day hole's a goal" I despair!!!!!

Boris10 Posted on 24/4 21:18
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

We think the same

Smifter Posted on 24/4 21:20
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

A bit disappointing. From a girls point of view she definitely wants you! Do it

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 24/4 21:45
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

I think the overwhelming feeling of relief when she said goodnight before I propositioned has put me off making the first move, I think I'll just wait and see what happens cos I'd of felt a right pillock if I'd asked her in and she'd said no thanks.

piggy_nichol Posted on 24/4 21:47
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

I see Mike Baldwins died

--- Post edited by piggy_nichol on 24/4 21:53 ---

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 24/4 21:51
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Is that someone out of a soap ?

Timesheet Posted on 24/4 21:53
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

"You!
I wanna take you to a gay bar,
I wanna take you to a gay bar,
I wanna take you to a gay bar, gay bar, gay bar. "


MontagueLongfellow Posted on 24/4 21:56
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Bugger off you cockney (Norf Lahndan branch) fancying transexual

knacked me smiley up

--- Post edited by MontagueLongfellow on 24/4 21:57 ---

CrazyL Posted on 24/4 21:57
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Monty text her FFS!!! Just something funny, cheeky and a little bit flirty. Man you are about to miss an open goal here. She is Juninho laying it on a silver platter to Billy Woof!

Timesheet Posted on 24/4 22:03
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Without being crude...Real Boro men would have been knacker deep by now...

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 24/4 22:05
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

"something funny, cheeky and a little bit flirty"

That gives me something to work with

"I love your eyes theyre full of passion, do you like it doggy fashion"

I'll do it now

CrazyL Posted on 24/4 22:11
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Tell her you checked with the barmaid and she told you there wasnt even any doors on the ladies toilets. And would she like to explain herself.Thank me later.

Smifter Posted on 24/4 22:13
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

CrazyL I like it, that would give me a good giggle, and if she is game enough she will give you a naughty one back.

Timesheet Posted on 24/4 22:14
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Don't egg him on CrazyL..he's clearly "confused"


MontagueLongfellow Posted on 24/4 23:01
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Is the lack of a reply a bad sign ?

CrazyL Posted on 24/4 23:01
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

The only thread ever that needs its own theme tune?

jax_1 Posted on 24/4 23:03
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Fraid so Monty, think maybe you should have tried something a little more subtle at first




--- Post edited by jax_1 on 24/4 23:04 ---

toon182 Posted on 24/4 23:54
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

tits i think you fucked up

this is the best thread on here its well addictive

Smifter Posted on 25/4 0:38
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

"Is the lack of a reply a bad sign ? "


onthemap Posted on 25/4 1:08
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Monty
Slight smell of bs, come on you started this - what happened?

Timesheet Posted on 25/4 7:13
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Hoof

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 25/4 8:10
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Text waiting for me this morning

"Hi, sorry missed u last nite c u @ work"

(I didnt send the exact message I said further up the thread btw, in fact it was nothing like it )

Timesheet Posted on 25/4 9:45
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Sounds promising Monty, play it cool otherwise you'll look desperate. (which you might be !)


Get_your_rat_out Posted on 25/4 9:53
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

So you werent able to give some cheese to her rat then?

tony_block19 Posted on 25/4 9:55
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Monty, she sounds well up for it!!
Have you spoken to her at work today??

Keep us all updated won't you, this thread just beats Boateng_7's 'Advice Needed' thread.

Timesheet Posted on 25/4 9:56
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Woo there tiger

Marlon_D Posted on 25/4 10:05
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Whatever happened to Boateng 7's "Advice Needed?"

Did he actually ring her in the end or did he shiit out??

Just thought I'd ask while we're waiting for the next installment of ML's quest to nail this bird.

tony_block19 Posted on 25/4 10:09
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

He sent a really dirty text to her house phone and her dad heard it.

Apparently, shes been in the stocks ever since.

Marlon_D Posted on 25/4 10:12
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

tony_block19 - one of them smiley things.

Anyway isn't it about time we started to organise a cyber-sweep for how long it will take ML to rattle this lass.

Baggs-eye Thursday night.

tony_block19 Posted on 25/4 10:18
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

I'd give it another 2 weeks at least! By the sound of it she seems one of those gals that is flirtacious and outgoing, but will keep you hanging on until you can enter the Lare of Moist.

Where though? That IS the question, my bet is the office photocopier after-hours one night, her arse pressing the 'copy' button every thrust.

boroboy75 Posted on 25/4 10:20
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Unlucky monty, it sounds like you thought she was well 'up for the cup'.
A dejected tug when you got home is scant consolation.

littlejimmy Posted on 25/4 10:25
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Stop living out your fantasies on this thread. I'm getting aroused and can't leave my desk.

Big_Ted_Church Posted on 25/4 10:25
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

I would love it if she's a boro fan, and been reading this thread. She could play you like a fool - be careful.

Test her with sommit that refers to a post on here, its fairly improbable she reads this, but if she does - oooh Montague, u could be in it knee depp, never mind knacker deep!!

But still - she sounds interested so lob it in her!!

tony_block19 Posted on 25/4 10:26
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

So you've obviously 'been there, done that' then, boroboy??

boroboy75 Posted on 25/4 10:28
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

tony, if the cannon is loaded, you might as well discharge it.

littlejimmy Posted on 25/4 10:28
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Let's be honest, tony - who hasn't at one time or another?
The trick is to do it without waking your wife.

tony_block19 Posted on 25/4 10:31
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Amen to that boroboy!!

Timesheet Posted on 25/4 10:43
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

"He sent a really dirty text to her house phone and her dad heard it"



mufflar Posted on 25/4 10:43
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

obviously the "Im waiting for you in the women's toilets" was a little subtle for young Monty...

tony_block19 Posted on 25/4 10:46
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

It's all well and good having her waiting in the toilets mufflar, but imagine the looks he would get when hes insisting with the toilet supervisor that hes going to help a young woman out of a cubicle.....

mufflar Posted on 25/4 10:47
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

where there's a will, there's a way Tony...

delier1908 Posted on 25/4 10:48
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Monty, you've got to see this from her point of view before it's too late. Remember she has her fears and insecurities like all of us.

If her advances are genuine, you have got to realise her predicament, and you my friend may have hesitated a bit too much, though I understand your reasons why.

From her point of view, young office girl fancies mature, handsome, experienced figure of authority. She wants to come on to you but knows someone like you must have women throwing themselves at you on an hourly basis. What chance would she stand?

But she thinks about it and decides to go for it. At first the subtle hints get her no-where, so she continues trying until she gets to the point where she ends up throwing herself at you. How do you respond (in her eyes) not interested. Didn't even go into the ladies bog to COME to her rescue.

In the taxi on the way home she comes to her senses and realises her folly must stop. AT THIS POINT YOU HAVE BLOWN IT!!

Take this advice. Buy her a box of chockies and a sweet card and tell her you really like her but are unsure if she feels the same. Her reply will let you know if she is genuine or not.

Best of luck dude!

mufflar Posted on 25/4 10:51
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

or just ask her out for a drink!??!?!

tony_block19 Posted on 25/4 10:52
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

You see mufflar, with my child-like, immature brain I would have said something like...

"Wheres theres a willy, theres a way...."

Which I'm sure you'll agree is very relevant in this circumstance.

Timesheet Posted on 25/4 10:54
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

When your at work text her and say can see come into the mens toilets as you think the doors stuck while you were having a crap, if she comes then your in luck !

mufflar Posted on 25/4 10:55
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

the thought never crossed my mind Tone ;-)

delier1908 Posted on 25/4 10:55
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Mufflar, are you male or female? Hooked up or single?

mufflar Posted on 25/4 10:57
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

male, hooked up..why?

tony_block19 Posted on 25/4 10:58
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Monty, if she comes into that toilet whilst your dropping the kids off at the pool, AND she stays! Then my friend that is not a crush nor lust! That is love at it's very finest!

delier1908 Posted on 25/4 11:01
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

I formed the impression you were possibly a single female and that you thought being asked out for a drink was better than receiving choccies and a card. I thought that interesting and was going to have some banter with you.

mufflar Posted on 25/4 11:05
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

thank god for that, thought you were going to tell me you were locked in the toliet!

seriously tho, surely women prefer a laid back, casual approach than a formal box of chocolates and flowers? its so kitsch...

delier1908 Posted on 25/4 11:14
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

They are all different aren't they. That's why we love and hate them so much!

But this one seems like a little cutie who has already done the drinks thing and in her mind got no further forward. Thought choccies and card (not flowers yet) would be nice for her.

If I find out where she works I'll be sending her them!!

Smifter Posted on 25/4 11:16
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Chocs and cards-its too early for that! It would just embarress me if a man did that, the harmless flirting should just continue at this stage!

mufflar Posted on 25/4 11:17
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

to be honest, if shes already tried the 'less than scenic' toilet approach, then sending flowers or chocolates would be a bit like ordering your starter after you've finished your desert!

The_Commisar Posted on 25/4 11:19
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Summary
As this post is now longer than war and peace, a synopsis for newer readers with a handy Smily-ometer to assist.

Met younger totty
Went for drinks with younger totty
Took advice from board
Actually listened to advice from board
Advised to investigate her rodent situation
Goes missing
Re-surfaces with tottys mobile number and exchanging texts
“Rat” Status not clarified, board ->
Interest from her parents in this thread

--- Post edited by The_Commisar on 25/4 11:19 ---

fishface101 Posted on 25/4 11:20
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

With a name like Montague longfellow what do you want our advice for.But while your at it take a camera and we'll all look forward to your next post.Look on the posotive side if it works out between you its a free lift into work on a mornin

Marlon_D Posted on 25/4 11:40
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

FFS....Mike Baldwin took less time to lose it and peg it than it's took ML to actually make a positive move.

JUST ASK HER OUT FOR A DRINK........IF SHE SAY'S NO SACK HER AND MOVE ON.
IF SHE SAYS YES........NAIL HER.
THEN SACK HER

Timesheet Posted on 25/4 12:04
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

The_Commisar

zaphod Posted on 25/4 13:12
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Sounds to me like she wants a genuine relationship rather than a quick fling. If you're interested in that, then take it slow, but keep it moving forward. Try inviting her to dinner or some such.

Don't worry about the age difference. A friend of mine spent months and months agonising over that before eventually dating his (now) wife. They've been married 30 years now.

boroboy75 Posted on 25/4 13:15
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Alternatively, get straight to the point, and ask her if you can sausage the back out of her.

janplanner Posted on 25/4 13:17
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

poor girl! she's made it quite clear she likes you, without blatently throwing herself at you, and you've wussed out at every turn.

you're in serious danger of losing the initiative here. if you do nothing by wednesday, she'll have made her weekend plans and you won't be in them! think on!

T4Tomo Posted on 25/4 13:46
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Having read this whilst eating my sandwich I'm inclined to agree with the planner lass. Her making a beeline to join you in the cab after trying to lure you into the ladies bogs was a bit of clue here.

She was waiting for you to suggest she came in for a coffee, presumably didn't want to completely fling herself at her senior co-worker by suggesting it herself.

Even after the cheek peck you could have popped in a quick "don't suppose you fancy popping in for a coffee then" and you'd have been playing hide the sausage before the kettle boiled.

The_Commisar Posted on 25/4 13:52
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

don't forget

Link: Think once, think twice, think........

grantus Posted on 25/4 14:02
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Ahar, the dirty old bugger thread. Very creative, kept me entertained through me lunchbox. I'll play along.

Stop fannying about and get her alone for dinner, drinks, whatever. The clock is ticking and you are about to miss the boat.

Forget all the chocolates, flowers rubbish. She's a work collegue, she'll be well embarresed and there's no need to be so cheesy. Just call her and ask her out.

Get her out, go back to her mam and dad's house and set the rat trap.

Easy.

Marlon_D Posted on 25/4 15:00
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

He's not getting away without putting some sort of end to this story.

HOOF !!

T4Tomo Posted on 25/4 15:09
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

couldn't agree more - make up an ending Monty - keep the troops entertained

Spoff_MFC Posted on 25/4 15:16
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

This thread is longer than any book I have ever read.

Timesheet Posted on 25/4 16:12
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace


bwoateng Posted on 25/4 16:22
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

hoof

come on......

Spoff_MFC Posted on 25/4 16:24
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Monty won't post until after this has hit 200, he wouldn't want to risk ending it.

The thread that is.

RaRaRasputin Posted on 25/4 16:45
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Sit on your hand until it goes numb, have a w4nk and imagine shes doing it, no pressure and no risk. Unless your mum catches you.

DybuksChampion Posted on 25/4 16:53
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Does your mam put pressure you to speed it up then RaRa?

Max_Headroom Posted on 25/4 17:08
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

"Oh Rasputin, I've caught you again. Do hurry up dear, your tea is on the table..... Well I don't know, just keep it off your school jumper. Just use the curtain, boy!"

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 25/4 18:49
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

I've got a date

Well I think I have, got in this morning to find I was heading out for the day so grabbed a coffee with R to say thanks for the night out and had a few laughs about it, then I did it, I told her I was just about to ask if she'd like a nightcap when she said goodnight.

She just laughed and said thered of been no point asking as she couldnt of had one but she might be able to next time so as time was pressing and I had a perfect excuse to dash off if an embarrassing silence developed I asked if she fancied a drink after work on Friday and to just let me know as I had to get in the car and go to a few meetings so she could have a think about it.

"##### # # o'clock x R"

Texted to my phone before I got out of the car park

--- Post edited by MontagueLongfellow on 25/4 19:07 ---

Lefty3668 Posted on 25/4 18:51
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

GO MONTY!!!!!!!!!!!!


Square 1 may well be chocca full of board members on Friday though!

--- Post edited by Lefty3668 on 25/4 18:54 ---

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 25/4 18:53
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

YO MONTY

YO MONTY

YO MONTY

WHOOOOOO WHOOOOOO WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

apl1970 Posted on 25/4 18:58
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Thats Square 1 being invaded on Friday from about dinnertime. Would go myself but I`ve got a wedding to photograph

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 25/4 19:06
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Sh­it, I'd best get rid of that , hardly a spectator sport

borokaza Posted on 25/4 19:35
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Can't believe I've just found this post. It's taken me half an hour to get thru it. Definately better than Eastenders.
And Square 1, good choice, especially as it's below the building I work in. Might have to stick my head round the door as I leave on Friday

Good luck Monty hope it goes well

parmo_army Posted on 25/4 19:40
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Well done Monty, and may I congratulate you on the good use of the impending departure in an embarressing situation scenario!

janplanner Posted on 25/4 19:46
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

oh, tremendous news!

get you, the office bike!

manboobs69 Posted on 25/4 19:47
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

What time do you want us all there on friday?

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 25/4 21:44
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

I either need a few people to edit their posts or suggestions for a change of venue

CrazyL Posted on 25/4 21:46
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Nice one Monty-Billy Woof finds the back of the net,in off the post at the third attempt. A word of advice (probably not required but i'm a worryat) Under no circumstances, however drunk you get and however well it's going, laugh and say 'course i never wudda asked you out if it werent for all me cyber mates on the fmttm message board'

--- Post edited by CrazyL on 25/4 21:50 ---

boro74 Posted on 25/4 21:48
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Magic.
I can see this going to 4 figures.

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 25/4 21:52
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

That would make me as popular as saying I only did it for a bet Crazy

toon182 Posted on 25/4 22:01
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

well done mate
laughing my head off at some of these posts, very amusing

but i think its your duty to keep us informed of any further developments and how it goes!!

oh and obviusly never mention this board though i think you know that.

Boris10 Posted on 25/4 22:01
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Trpple post only i could do it ..................

--- Post edited by Boris10 on 25/4 22:03 ---

Boris10 Posted on 25/4 22:02
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

As Above....

--- Post edited by Boris10 on 25/4 22:04 ---

Boris10 Posted on 25/4 22:02
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Wey up Extra Time Being played

tony_block19 Posted on 25/4 22:16
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Good on you Monty, chuffed to bits for ya mate!!
Nowt better than getting the thumbs up from a lass.

Sorry what time was that in Square1 again?

CrazyL Posted on 25/4 22:27
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

This thread needs an anti-hero. Is there an ex-boyfriend around, a Newcastle supporter maybe? All of a sudden perhaps she realises that she can't make Friday and would Thursday at 7-45 be ok? Or maybe there is an as yet undisclosed medical condition or a pair of dangerously psycotic older brothers.

toon182 Posted on 25/4 22:29
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

i am!!!
and shes my age but to be honest i couldnt do that to Monty
i feel ive known him for too long
it'd be like stealing your mates girlfriend.
i couldnt be that guy!

Smifter Posted on 26/4 0:30
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Played Monty

Marlon_D Posted on 26/4 7:34
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Thank fook for that.

I had a sleepless night worrying about all this, would he ask, has she seen this thread, would she say yes etc. etc........

The only thing that worries me is I think Monty might have been too forward...Winky smiley thing.

Good luck on your date Monty, lets just hope she's not post-op transexual...........Here's hoping <crosses fingers>

Timesheet Posted on 26/4 8:08
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

I'm now very worried for this girl. She thinks she has innocently agreed to a date with "a member of the senior management team" because she presumably likes him, BUT she has agreed to a date with us all watching, as her would be boyfriend shares all the gory details with a bunch of cyber people he doesn't know.

P.S. Don't forget to let us know what happens

zaphod Posted on 26/4 8:34
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

What worries me is that Monty will screw it up by being too indecisive. SHE LIKES YOU, so approach the event with confidence.

sasboro Posted on 26/4 9:08
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

i heard on the radio this morning that prescott had an affair with his secretary. it kind of reminded me of MontagueLongfellow's situation.

jax_1 Posted on 26/4 9:14
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Oh sas
Poor Monty, I'm sure he has a lot more going for him than Prescott does in the wit, charm, looks, intelligence etc, stakes.




--- Post edited by jax_1 on 26/4 9:40 ---

mufflar Posted on 26/4 9:42
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Monty - Do you want to borrow a Barry White CD?

Timesheet Posted on 26/4 9:56
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Monty - I've got a box of Milk Tray you can have.

boroboy75 Posted on 26/4 10:15
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

tony block said
"Nowt better than getting the thumbs up from a lass"

Not when she's wearing false fingernails, tony.
*Ahem*

--- Post edited by boroboy75 on 26/4 10:19 ---

Timesheet Posted on 26/4 10:47
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

I, Timesheet, do hereby stake copyright ownership of this thread and all its content. I clearly see a best selling book and then potentially a blockbuster film of these "true" events.

Director - Timesheet
Young Girl - C Tweedy
Monty - J Prescott


keep this hoofed as I'm only on page 4

tony_block19 Posted on 26/4 10:50
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

boroboy!!!
Ouch!

Marlon_D Posted on 26/4 11:11
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Whhhoooooooooooooaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.....................

Can't let this thread slip down the board that much.

Tut tut.

Hoof

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 26/4 11:12
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Just for the record I do not look like John Prescott, its not that Im vain or anything but if I looked like him Id certainly know I was being wound up.

Think more of a C Thomas Howell, thats as close as I can get to a look-a-like but I'm certainly no double

Right, off for a quick coffee

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 26/4 13:16
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Went to the Hoggs Head for a sandwich and a pint with a colleague for lunch, after getting served and ordering I noticed "R" and another couple of the girls from the office were in there and they called us over to join them. we had our sandwiches and got chatting and last Friday cropped up and one of the other girls "M" said what a great night it was and was looking forward to doing it again this week.

I think I've got the wrong end of the stick after all, she must be inviting everyone out again as last week was such a good night, although I enjoyed it its not really my type of thing, the town or going out in a big group, so I'll probably give it a miss.

Nice while it lasted

Max_Headroom Posted on 26/4 13:20
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Nah Monty, don't jump to conclusions, you are still golden. She probably hasnt told HER mates that she can't make it yet. Don't worry about it at all.

Remember my golden rule: every girl fancies you until they tell you otherwise

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 26/4 13:42
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Im starting to think Get_your_rat_out and RaRaRasputin might of been right all along, I should know better really.

mufflar Posted on 26/4 13:48
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

FFS! what is wrong with the blokes on here?

Read these song lyrics and take note! Use it or lose it Monty!!


If you hurt me, you won't be the first or the last
In a lifetime of many mistakes.
But I won't spend tomorrow regretting the past
For the chances that I didn't take.

(corus)'Cause I'll never know 'til it's over
If I'm right or I'm wrong loving you,
But I'd rather be sorry for something I've done
Than for something that I didn't do.

When you touch me it's easy to make me believe
Tomorrow won't take you away
But I'd gamble whatever tomorrow might bring
For the love that I'm living today.

corus

I know someday that I may wake up all alone
When the love I believed in has died
But at least I won't wonder what I might have won
From the lifetime that I watched going by

corus

tony_block19 Posted on 26/4 13:55
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Monty, you'd be a fool if you gave up now! Maybe she just wants to get to know you better, before she goes out on a 'date' with you??

Keep the faith Monty! You've got half the male population of FMTTM behind you!! (Stop it!)

Max_Headroom Posted on 26/4 13:55
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Maybe tomorrow, I'll find a home and settle down
Until tomorrow, I'll just keep moving on
Every stop I make
I find a new friend

something something da da da da daaaa

I dont know why mufflar's post made me think of the Littlest Hobo, but I think these lyrics can be used for any occasion.

Especially when you need cheering up and a confidence booster

grantus Posted on 26/4 14:03
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Oh no! The horror, the wrong end of the stick.

I dont know if I can bare to watch anymore, come on Montegue, get back in there fella. Don't let this put you off, it can't be what it seems.

She loves you,
she loves you not.
She loves you,
she loves you not.
She loves you....


Away you dirty old bugger, time's not on your side, get it sorted, you can do it lad.

Remember, you're cool, cool, she wants you, that's 'cause your cool


Until tomorrow, I'll just keep movin' on.

--- Post edited by grantus on 26/4 14:04 ---

littlejimmy Posted on 26/4 14:14
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Did she actually talk about going out as a group herself? Maybe she was keeping quiet because she doesn't want your budding relationship to be in the public domain yet. You need to seek clarification in some way.

deano2k12 Posted on 26/4 14:16
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

im loving this story

a big hoooffffffffffffffff from Deano!!

VodkaByName Posted on 26/4 14:19
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Correct me if I'm wrong here folks but it seems it was her friend 'M' who suggested doing it again and not the lovely 'R' - how come that now means she's not interested anymore?!?!

Monty - gerrin there, you'll live to regret it and this board will become very boring without it........

mufflar Posted on 26/4 14:22
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Smell the flowers while you can Monty!!!

Perry_Combover Posted on 26/4 14:28
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

dont give up so easily

remember it dont mean nowt if you aint poked her clout

grantus Posted on 26/4 14:30
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

You and your bloody dandelions mufflar, you should practice what you preach.

Anyway, this "R" sort, what do we reckon?

Rachel, Roberta, Raquel, Rebecca, Rose?

I reckon its Rita.

mufflar Posted on 26/4 14:32
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

or Ray?

janplanner Posted on 26/4 14:32
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

c thomas howell was really cute. when he was young.

Max_Headroom Posted on 26/4 14:35
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Roxy Leggs?


Dream on Max, dream on...

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 26/4 14:40
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

VodkaByName

The fact that "M" knew there was a night out arranged for Friday and she said she was looking forward to it told me that unlike the scenario I had of "R" and myself enjoying a night together it seems that its now just a general night out, well at least one other person knows about it and is going.

Thanks for the songs everyone but The Smiths would be more suitable.

pnefan Posted on 26/4 14:41
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

If, as it seems, romance isn't on the cards after all, you've got nothing to lose Montague, so . . . why not ask BOTH R and M if they fancy a 3-some with you?

I'm sure they won't mind you enquiring (if you don't ask, you don't get) and if you take some pics on your mobile you could quite possibly make a bob or two: win-win situation.

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 26/4 14:47
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Im not sure if that was supposed to be compliment or an insult planner, payback for the frumpy digs no doubt

pne, Im struggling with one, I've got no chance of sorting two out

Boro85 Posted on 26/4 14:47
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Monty, you need a subtle text message sent to her to find out whats going on. Soemthing light hearted and jovial about being disappointed you wont get her all to yourself on friday.

grantus Posted on 26/4 14:51
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Something like "I thought Friday night was going to be you and I. What's that dirty slapper M coming for?"

Lefty3668 Posted on 26/4 14:52
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Monty, what you've got is a date that is starting off with her and her friends to get the night off to a good start. They will be sizing you up to make sure they approve of you though before leaving the two of you to your own devices at some point later on. The strategy will be all carefully worked out so just leave it to them and go with the flow.

If at any point you start to resent this deviousness you can always let them into a secret:-

'80% of the people in this pub are on the lookout for a C. Thomas Howell lookalike in a flowery shirt, and they know what you're up to.'

EireBoro Posted on 26/4 14:55
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Hmm. Yes this has become a trickier proposition than it seemed a few hours ago.

There are a few different possibilities:

1: She planned to go out with you on the fri but when her mates suggested going out again she wasn't able to say "no I'm popping out with one of the management team insted" so she played along. She may bail on them or arrange it for another night with you.

2: She has gotten cold feet, proposed a general nite out on fri so as to draw in more people and defuse the awkward situation.

3: Maybe she would prefer to hook up with you in a less nervous setting of a general night out before going on a "date" and thats why she's going along with the new arrangements.

I say go with the flow. Head out on friday on a general night out if thats what happens and and play it cool.

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 26/4 14:56
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Lefty are you female ?

You seem to have an insight into the workings of the female mind.

*note, remember to change venue or wear plain clothes and a hat

pnefan Posted on 26/4 14:59
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Suggested txt message:

"R: do u fancy a length of my lino up yor lobby?"

That should do it.

markwhitehead12 Posted on 26/4 15:01
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Forget chocolates and stuff. Buy her a ticket for tomorrow night, sat with you (so what if you've already bought one - this could be destiny!).

I expect at least 1 goal so there is your chance to grab her, hug her, kiss her, and maybe slip a finger.

I did that once......the bloke next to me went ballistic.

janplanner Posted on 26/4 15:02
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

that's just the effect what i was aiming for, mr longfellow.

pnefan Posted on 26/4 15:03
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

When you mentioned to her that you almost invited her in for a 'nightcap' (nudge, nudge) last weekend, according to your own account she: "said thered of been no point asking as she couldnt of had one but SHE MIGHT BE ABLE TO NEXT TIME".

I think this means you are on a promise - whether you meet her with or without the others.

--- Post edited by pnefan on 26/4 15:05 ---

grantus Posted on 26/4 15:03
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Montague, do NOT play along, you need some clarity with Rita.

If the worst is true and she has gotten cold feet. You hanging around a bunch of younger girls on a regular basis isn't the ideal image a member of the management team should be portraying.

Some might say sad, or desperate.

You are still in control of this situation, keep it that way. Understand what is going on before you go out with "the crowd".

Believe me, it makes sense.

Get_your_rat_out Posted on 26/4 15:13
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Havent bin on this thread for a while, i noticed that monty said i may be right, can someone give me the jist of whats happened so far?

Max_Headroom Posted on 26/4 15:15
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Adding to what pnefan said (whats up with you by the way? Play offs not exciting enough? ;-)) she had 'txted you back before you had left the car park'.

This can only mean 2 things:

1 she was so thrilled by the proposition she couldn't contain her fingers, and texted straight back

2 you are so unfit or day dreamy that leaving the car park is a mammoth task that takes over half an hour to complete.

It could of course be a very large carpark and you had the one space left at the far end behind the bins and you were blocked in by a truck. But I digress...

You are still in there so strut a bit

jimmytk Posted on 26/4 15:17
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

i think the longfellow could be deceiving us here a bit. I think he got very worried when we worked out which bar he was meeting 'R' in on friday night. Therefore he is trying to make out that he's not going to bother anymore to avoid a potentially embarrassing situation on friday night when he has 50 or so FMTTM spectators following his every move.

sasboro Posted on 26/4 15:17
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

get a good mate to pretend to chat her up and ask her out and see if she says no or mentions having another date already.

Marlon_D Posted on 26/4 15:23
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

I've been out at a meeting for a few hours and soooo much has happened.

Monty for what it's worth here's my take on it and sound advice (Ask anyone who knows me I could have worked for Relate).
Text her and tell her she has led you on just like every other female has in your life and if she doesn't turn up by herself on Friday it's over, as beautiful as it was whilst it lasted.

But obviously use text speak cos it'll be cheaper.

Lefty3668 Posted on 26/4 15:30
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Nice try Sas.

No Monty, I'm not female. Not sure whether to be afronted or not by that.

RaRaRasputin Posted on 26/4 15:35
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Shes too young anyway, you would be better off with someone your own age, because she will want to go to nightclubs in ten years time and a 48 year old fella in a nightclub is sad!

sasboro Posted on 26/4 15:35
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

i've just spoke to briggsy and his advice which is good is to, go out on friday and go with the flow. do not look too keen. but make the effort to talk to her and ask here a few questions like if she has boyfriend or not, if not why not.blah blah depending on how the converation goes then ask her out properly in the flesh. then you know eitherway

scuzzmonster Posted on 26/4 15:50
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

But be sure to keep an eye on your phone.

CrazyL Posted on 26/4 16:09
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Monty this is easily sorted.Be upbeat about Friday, say you are going and find out what time and where. Do not turn up until at least an hour after you are supposed to (an hour and a half if you can hold your nerve) If you get a text from R enquiring as to your whereabouts then you can be sure you're in. If you don't well then......

--- Post edited by CrazyL on 26/4 16:14 ---

Max_Headroom Posted on 26/4 16:34
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

270!!

Timesheet Posted on 26/4 17:08
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Away for couple of hours and look what happens...Monty blows the date on friday by allowing the whole department to turn up in Square 1. (plus all his FMTTM "advisers")

You need to play it cool or you will look very desperate and sad. That does not go down well with the ladieeees. Although saying that it's now or never because if see doesn't go for it now see'll only see you as a friend (boo hoo). Only a friend means no positive rat sightings....


T4Tomo Posted on 26/4 17:37
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Its pretty obvious now tat she doesn't want a fll relationship with you due to the who work colleague age seniority gap thing. However she does want your sausage.

She'd have had it last week except she had the decorators in, Friday there will be no holding back. under the guise of a drink with colleagues after work she will flirt with you all night, share a cab back with you and be there to cook you breakfast on saturday morning.

This scenario will be repeated most weeks until one of you get bored / wants more and then it will ned in tears.

Good luck

Lefty3668 Posted on 26/4 17:44
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Poor old Ned.

Falconer Posted on 26/4 18:03
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Monty - let your porkin' do the talkin' ... go for it !

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 26/4 18:54
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Confusion solved, I asked a few other people in the office over the course of the afternoon what they are doing Friday and have had a diverse range of activities, non of which includes a pub crawl around town. It seems its only "M" that thinks its a full on get together again, must of got the wrong end of the stick, no doubt "R" put her right after they left the pub earlier.

Game on

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 26/4 18:54
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Confusion solved, I asked a few other people in the office over the course of the afternoon what they are doing Friday and have had a diverse range of activities, non of which includes a pub crawl around town. It seems its only "M" that thinks its a full on get together again, must of got the wrong end of the stick, no doubt "R" put her right after they left the pub earlier.

Game on

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 26/4 18:55
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Ooops, a bit pre-mature with my trigger finger

Smifter Posted on 26/4 18:55
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Oh Monty just when I was going to suggest I came out with you to make her jealous

micky_k86 Posted on 26/4 18:57
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Good on you.

You'll be playing feed the rat by the end of friday evening.

--- Post edited by micky_k86 on 26/4 18:58 ---

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 26/4 18:58
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Im free tomorrow evening but itll have to be a quick un

Edit to clarify Mickys post wasnt there when I responded to smifters

--- Post edited by MontagueLongfellow on 26/4 18:59 ---

Timesheet Posted on 26/4 18:58
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Do you want me to come along Monty ? double date sort of thing ? First come first serve !

jd1973 Posted on 26/4 19:02
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

I can't wait for Saturday morning now...the suspense is killing me.

Just don't drink too much - if the cage is open but the beast is asleep would be a total anticlimax.

micky_k86 Posted on 26/4 19:04
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

I have visions of this going the whole way, like marriage n that. I look forward to the board coming up with ideas on how to propose.

boro74 Posted on 26/4 19:22
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Yeah, and if they have kids we can pick the names.

Massimo for the first boy.

Timesheet Posted on 26/4 19:28
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Stanley for a girl...

CrazyL Posted on 26/4 19:55
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Our very own 'The Truman Show'.

Smifter Posted on 26/4 20:20
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Everyone has been so understanding with Monty, give this poor lad a hand

Link: Give his website a hit

OooOo Posted on 26/4 22:33
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

I feel it is time I contributed a bit after reading this addictive thread for the last few days!

Rather than ask her if she has a boyfriend ask her 'are you single?'. It implies more.

Just my pennies worth :)

HalfManHalfParmo Posted on 27/4 1:02
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

I'm away for the week-end! Is there a mailing list or subscription type membership update style link thingy forwarding text wotcha-ma-callit.


Or do I have to wait 'til Monday to find out if she takes it up the skitter?

Marlon_D Posted on 27/4 7:40
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Back at work, the sun is shining, UEFA semi tonight and it looks like Monty took all our sincere advice and finally got there.

Good luck tomorrow night Monty (whoever you are)......

I can just imagine it now Monty leaning in for a tender kiss in Squareone and everybody (in a Boro attack getting over the halfway line stylee) shouting,

Go on....Gooo Oonnnnn.......

parmo_army Posted on 27/4 9:16
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

That'd be hilarious Marlon, followed by a rousing EIO when she recpricates the advances.

Marlon_D Posted on 27/4 9:32
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

And then a old Holgate style.............

Gerrin to 'er and feel her rat, gerrin to 'er and feel her rat
(repeat)

pnefan Posted on 27/4 10:49
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

"Ooops, a bit pre-mature with my trigger finger"

Hope that wasn't an omen for Friday night ...

;-)

Good luck

PS I think this mb should be advising Monty re his attire for the Friday rendezvous. I recommend white suit, open-necked black shirt, medallion, black socks and white loafers with a gold chain across. Tell her you were born to dance and whatever music is played, get on the dance-floor and strike some Travolta-esque poses. And remember to get the Barry White CDs ready for your return back home ...

PPS Will there be txt message updates re progress over the Bank Holiday weekend? ...

Lefty3668 Posted on 27/4 11:20
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Black socks or no socks?

pnefan Posted on 27/4 11:24
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Mebbe one sock and one no-sock.

Spoff_MFC Posted on 27/4 11:32
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Hang on, it looked like 'M' let slip is was a group outing but after asking around no one else is going. So it will be Monty, 'R' and 'M'

How has no one spotted this...

Threesome

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 27/4 11:50
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Kids, crowds and clothes, thnks all.

Spoff, now that would be funny

(do things like that really happen ? lol)

Yarnyell Posted on 27/4 12:35
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

This is the funniest thread I have read in a long while.

Go for it Montague you only live once but make sure you treat the girl well.

From an Oxford fan.

Can't wait to hear how they got on.

Smifter Posted on 27/4 12:54
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

I love the way fans from around the country all now know about Montys "sexual harrassment in the workplace"

pnefan Posted on 27/4 12:58
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Not only that, but as per "The Treble" thread, if (when) Boro get a result tonight the pressure will really be on for Monty to deliver the goods on Friday ...

;-)

Marlon_D Posted on 27/4 13:21
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Right I think it's time to call on the Smogster to organise a seating card display for Friday night.

My suggestion - He shall comeover her one day

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 27/4 13:27
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Quick update

Just had a sandwich for lunch today in the coffee room, sure enough "R" made an appearence and joined me, while we were sat there having a good old chinwag "M" turned up and sat with us joining in the conversation.

Now then, "M" is definitely coming to "the pub" with us straight after work on friday, that became apparent from the conversation and "R" didnt say anything to put her off. After lunch I rang "R" and said I was under the impression it was just going to be the two of us, then she told me that "M" had overheard me asking her about going out for a drink and when she mentioned it to "R" "R" said she explained it was an open to all thing as a follow up to last fridays night out so as not to have her start the office gossip.

It might not be a bad thing at the end of the day as if its not going too well from either of our point of view either I can make my excuses and leave them to it or "R" can say her and "M" are off now and Ill go get a taxi home.

An evenings post work drink in the company of TWO lovely ladies cant be a bad thing

Marlon_D Posted on 27/4 13:38
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Monty - Fair play to you. At the start I was like the rest of the audience who thought you were fannying around a bit too much but the last couple of days you've played a blinder.
Good to see you're taking some of the sincere advice handed out by fellow board members.

This thread is like watching the Boro........Sometimes it's painful but you just can't help coming back.

VodkaByName Posted on 27/4 13:45
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

I take my hat off to you Monty - you've come up trumps!!

Only problem is the mooners will have much more of a chance seeking you out with two young loverly ladies on your arm......

tony_block19 Posted on 27/4 13:46
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

....and we have a knack for scoring in the last minute.

With a bit of luck, so will Monty tomorrow night.

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 27/4 13:47
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Thanks Marlon (I think)

I have a plan to look cool tomorrow, Im going into work in casual gear, jeans and top, if questioned by "The Man" I'll tell him its a Southern thing that I'm experimenting with, relaxed day on the last day of the month, team bonding and letting the plebs know we are human

(plebs is a jike btw)

Boro85 Posted on 27/4 13:48
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Straight after work? Excellant. Thats a 'ball park' time for stalkers/supporters if i ever saw one.

littlejimmy Posted on 27/4 13:49
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Told you so!

boredreceptionist Posted on 27/4 13:50
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

'M' seems a bit dense to me...doesn't she know when she's not wanted? Hope something happens which stops her from tagging along, or maybe another board member could intervene on Friday night and buy her a drink, leaving Monty and R alone.

pnefan Posted on 27/4 13:52
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

"Casual gear, jeans and top"???

Nooooo, Monty, you're in danger of jeopardising "The Treble" with your casual approach.

Get yourself smartened up, lad.

England expects ...

;-)

Boro85 Posted on 27/4 13:53
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Drop us an office number and we'll arrange for M to get a call from James Cook Hospital around that time requiring her immediate attention.

Spoff_MFC Posted on 27/4 13:56
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

R appears to have been right up for it ever since the beginning, and now M has appeared on the scene.

I'll say again

Threesome

--- Post edited by Spoff_MFC on 27/4 13:58 ---

Lefty3668 Posted on 27/4 14:01
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Spoff's threesome theory is still in play here.

pnefan Posted on 27/4 14:02
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Spoff, I'm with you on the 3some potential, but Monty has already nixxed the suggestion yesterday (mid-thread above):

pnefan: "If, as it seems, romance isn't on the cards after all, you've got nothing to lose Montague, so . . . why not ask BOTH R and M if they fancy a 3-some with you?"

ML: "pne, Im struggling with one, I've got no chance of sorting two out"

Gray1986 Posted on 27/4 14:07
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Hey monty wots this "M" Like coz you might just be lucky enough to have two stalkers!

zaphod Posted on 27/4 14:09
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

It sounds like M is doing it deliberately to see if there's anything going on. Play it cool and fix up another date when you're alone with R.

zaphod Posted on 27/4 14:09
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

It sounds like M is doing it deliberately to see if there's anything going on. Play it cool and fix up another date when you're alone with R. If R is worried about being gossipped about, it sounds like she's not planning to mess you around.

Lefty3668 Posted on 27/4 14:13
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Maybe all the fmttm voyeurs who turn up to the bar can adopt a James Bond theme to the evening and distract 'M'.

Remember to stand in the doorway and throw a hat into the room before you enter, people.

pnefan Posted on 27/4 14:15
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

OR camp it up big style when in M's presence between now and tomorrow afternoon. Explain that you'd like to meet privately with R as you've got "partner" problems and you "need a shoulder to cry on".

Hey presto: (a) no malicious office gossip about you and R 'cos everyone'll think you're gay (b) M will back off to "allow you some space" to blub to R about yer boyfriend.

grantus Posted on 27/4 14:17
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

'M' Hmmmmmmm.

Michelle, Melenie, Maria?

I reckon Martha.

junior17_1985 Posted on 27/4 14:35
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

mont just say during pub thing hope we can sneak off with out her but not like that... make joke say hope you have brought your night cap! so when getting taxi and she shares it with you, which she will do if she is after it and M pops along drop her off first then you then work your magic!

Marlon_D Posted on 27/4 14:55
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Monty - Just thinking aloud here.........................

But what's the chance of a "Dear Deidre Photo Casebook" type of thing for this thread.

I think if you could do this it's got 4 figures written all over it.

Thought I'd ask.

Smifter Posted on 27/4 15:06
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

*tears in my eyes*, HE RANG HER!!! Yayyyy! Boateng_7 take note!

So what you just rang her whilst you were both in the office? didnt anyone else notice?

Spoff_MFC Posted on 27/4 15:10
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

I'VE GOT IT

We are fairly sure that R like's Monty. But we want conrete proof realy.

Monty, you need to flurt with M, if R gets jealous then it is obvious she likes you.

If not just go home with M (plus it is a beter letter then R)

Smog_Monster Posted on 27/4 15:53
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

This is gold
M and R, what is the plural for Rattus?
Or should that be collective noun?

--- Post edited by Smog_Monster on 27/4 15:54 ---

Tony30 Posted on 27/4 16:04
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Fantastic thread, just spent the last hour reading it, forgotten completely about the match!

Cant stop thinking about Monty, Rita, Martha and The Rat

GazC_MFC Posted on 27/4 17:15
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

If M is emo ill sort her out for you....right dirty ones those emo girls

CrazyL Posted on 27/4 17:43
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Sorry Ive got nothing to add to the thread.I just need to post so i know where ive read up to. Cheers!

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 27/4 18:11
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

I hope Im as excited this time tomorrow evening as I am this evening

CMON BORO

GrumpyOldGit Posted on 27/4 19:16
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

I've been away for a while and missed this!! What a great way of taking my mind off the game for a while.

Go Monty, it's threesome without a doubt. We all want to know what happens, don't let us down

Timesheet Posted on 28/4 8:20
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

HOOF

With all this excitment, we nearly forgot about Monty's big day.....can he make it 2 ?


CrazyL Posted on 28/4 8:27
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Monty old son.The karma is very positive!

john_lillie Posted on 28/4 8:31
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

for future reference, i have read up to this point

good luck fella, here's hoping you can bag 2 like mass did last night.

pnefan Posted on 28/4 9:59
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Well, Monty, today's the day and the game's afoot!

No pressure, but Boro delivered the first step en route to "The Treble" last night so its over to you now ...

England expects ...

;-)

PS To put this lass "in the mood" take along a portable cassette recorder and play Rod Stewart warbling "Tonight's the Night" if the conversation dips when you're in the pub. Don't say anything, just look deep. Can't fail ...

--- Post edited by pnefan on 28/4 10:01 ---

pnefan Posted on 28/4 10:00
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Oops. Sent twice. Trigger happy.

(Learn from my mistake, Monty)

--- Post edited by pnefan on 28/4 10:00 ---

Timesheet Posted on 28/4 10:48
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

MONTY !!!

MONTY !!!

MONTY !!!

MONTY !!!

No pressure or anything. What time are we all meeting ? I'll just iron my flowery shirt. and chinos . and white socks .

chadders1984 Posted on 28/4 10:54
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

And to think i only came on your message board to congratulate you on last night! this is best thread ive read in months. who needs to watch corrie or enders when you've got your very own soap opera going on here?

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 28/4 11:04
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Morning all

What a fooking night, I fear "R" / "M" or indeed both of them will have to be something special this evening if they want to jump on my bones.

A sexuual threesome is all well and good but I doubt it can get anywhere near lightning striking twice.

Right, I'm off out at lunch time to have my head shaved and learn some itallian phrases in case I do fancy bagging a brace tonight

jaseMFC Posted on 28/4 11:35
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Monty...The blue MFC will be cheering you on tonight just like we did for the Boro last night...You too can score tonight son..Grease the pair of them up mate and get sunk to nuts mate !! got a video phone..if not nip out and get one mate and it will be like watching the Boro again for us boys !! Come on Monty get those back wheels in son

Lefty3668 Posted on 28/4 11:48
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Good luck Monty. Hope you're wearing suitable togs.

pnefan Posted on 28/4 12:00
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Monty, depending on how it goes tonite you might find this website useful:

http://www.whendatesgobad.co.uk/

(Only joking)

Derby_Red Posted on 28/4 12:43
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

COME ON MONTY!!

(Note - expression of encouragement, not an instruction to "R" or/and "M" in any way. Although......)

vena Posted on 28/4 12:51
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

quallity thread,
couldnt resit not commenting anymore

monty if you are not playing for the 3some take a mate a bloke, with you tomorrow aswell it will be easier, and if you want to impress her pay her into the empire think its £20 and im sure her being so young it will be her scene, (that is if the date hasnt already ended good/bad), spend all morning saturday with her (in bed) then go somwhere nice for lunch.

good luck

Smifter Posted on 28/4 15:11
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Go on Monty son

grantus Posted on 28/4 15:16
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Well I can feel it coming in the air tonight.

Monty.

He'll be shagging Rita to within an inch of her life.

If he's lucky.

If he's lucky.

Bigjayce Posted on 28/4 15:51
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Can't believe I have to wait till tuesday to find out the next installment.

Smifter Posted on 28/4 18:18
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Do it do it do it do it do it

GazC_MFC Posted on 28/4 19:58
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Update

An oldish looking male, around the age of mid forties to early fifties was making a quick getaway in a taxi with a younger woman around 7pm to a raptious crowd in square 1.

Another younger woman emerged from the toilets 2 minutes later. One onlooker was quoted to saying "she looked startled and lost". Bookies are due to lose up to £2000 on bets staked on the male.

--- Post edited by GazC_MFC on 28/4 19:59 ---

broady91 Posted on 28/4 21:15
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Bumping this back up!


Hopefully monty will be doing a bit of his own bumping tonight



GO ON SON!

Timesheet Posted on 29/4 7:37
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Hoof

CzechBoro Posted on 29/4 7:45
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Why do I get the impression that this is a complete set up (Hmmmmmmm).

I am aware of at least 3 who use about 4 monikers and make up stories for effect. Is this turning into the daddy of them all?

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 29/4 8:23
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Mornning/afternoon

Im knackered and on my way to bed, got in and made a cuppa, checked e-mails and going to crash, had to say a big thanks to everyone for their encouragement as I do believe last night was on par with Cardiff 2004, gotta go get some sleep or I'll miss the match, thanks again, tarra

GazC_MFC Posted on 29/4 8:40
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

You mean....

toon182 Posted on 29/4 8:53
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

so i take it you nobbed her then?

ews26 Posted on 29/4 10:07
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Is he taking the mick?! Its just took me an hour to read all that, I get to the end and he's leaving us in the dark about last night?!

PS Monty bit too much info in the thread I worked out where you work!

--- Post edited by ews26 on 29/4 10:07 ---

Valer Posted on 29/4 10:13
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Yeah I think I may have worked it out too - if I'm right it's where my daughter works and her name begins with R - you're dead Longfellow.

manboobs69 Posted on 29/4 10:35
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Has anyone else sussed that MontagueLongfellow is steve McClaren?

borotiger Posted on 29/4 11:35
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

well it's saturday morning is no news good news!!

my excuse is i am a slow reader sorry.

--- Post edited by borotiger on 29/4 11:38 ---

noidal Posted on 29/4 12:33
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

are you SADISTIC or something Monty?!!! WHAT ARE YOU PLAYIN AT?!! put a proper fookin end to this saga, with all the heartfelt support and advice you've gotten from this board, you fookin OWE it to us to conclude properly!!!

boro_4ever Posted on 29/4 13:46
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

I reckon you should give it a shot as if she was wanting to enhance her career she wouldnt flirt, she would probably just try and become more of a good friend to you. But anyway, give it a shot and see what happens because if you dont, and it turns out she likes you for who you are, not because she wants a promotion or whatever, then you could end up regretting it!

ahhgee Posted on 29/4 16:24
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Monty sandwich?

Smifter Posted on 29/4 19:33
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Monty you are a tease, get this story wrapped up!!

Stoichkov Posted on 29/4 20:35
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Dont do this monty,this is the best post ever,dont ruin it,ye feckin cant.

broady91 Posted on 29/4 20:49
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Back to the top and monty you cant leave us here

Did you nob her or not??

Is it just me or is this the real life big brother(or the truman show as said before)

LondonBoro Posted on 29/4 22:03
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Did she play hide the sausage or what?....

toon182 Posted on 29/4 23:26
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

bet shes gone back for more tonight

monty you old dog!!!

Boro_Buddha Posted on 30/4 0:04
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Sussed it!! Ant and Dec are getting revenge on gullible Boro fans. Monty will be 'outed' on ITV.

Far_From_Home Posted on 30/4 9:09
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

wake up WAKE UP!!! Common monty you're letting the side down...

arkwright Posted on 30/4 10:11
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

The suspense is killing me!!!!

tony_block19 Posted on 30/4 10:15
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Noooooooooooo way Monty!!! After all this!!

I'm going to go on a massive assumption that you dipped your wick until sunrise, then you nipped to McDonalds for a Breakfast Bagel and a cuppa coffee, then stuck a single flower in a small vase on the breakfast tray for good measure!!

swordtrombonefish Posted on 30/4 10:20
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

I considered this earlier and even then I spotted a paradox for 'Mounty'

He may actually like this young lady a lot more than he initially thought he would. Having made public the whole sorry 'tail', he no longer wishes to drag the poor girls reputation and good name through the mud.

I mean, what if this became long term and even a stable relationship......Monty - how could you?

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 30/4 14:41
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Where was I ?

Oh yes, Square 1 Friday at just after 5 o'clock I noticed a few shifty looking characters hanging around, this I did through the window as we made our way to get a taxi as for obvious reasons I thought it best that a change of venue be sorted, I couldn't help telling the girls that I'd meet them at the taxi and took a little detour to see if the place was toe to toe with FMTTM shirts

Anyway, I decided that we'd go out of town as it would of been embarrassing if someone had recognised us and shouted "get your rats out" or the like so we had a night out round Yarm which I havent been to very often but "R" frequents fairly regular. We started off in a pub called The Bull, looked tiny from the outside but was a good size inside. We spent the night laughing and joking and I was surprised at how comfortable it felt as I expected it to be a bit awkward with "M" tagging along but it probably made it easier. After a bit of a pub crawl we ended upstairs in a pub that had music and a dance floor and stayed for a couple hours or so then decided to call it a night, went over the road and jumped in one, now as we were at Yarm it meant that "R" was the first drop off and when we pulled she dragged me and "M" in to hers for a drink.

After a couple of vodkas the girls got up and said were going to bed are you going to join us ? Fook me I fooking froze and started stuttering. "R" said Ill be in the bedroom on the left "M" will be in the one on the right, just decide which order you want us in and get ar­se up there when youre ready and off they went.

Now bearing in mind it had been like a night out with two mates it caught me off guard a little bit, Id been worrying about the pros and cons of a spot of passion with one office junior now it was two. Quite a dilema also trying to decide which I would go to first because it would be a snub to the one I chose not to go to first. So Im stood there in this lounge toying with my problem as it were and I hear them starting to giggle so I go upstairs and follow my lugs to the master bedroom where the pair of them are sat in bed stripped and beckoning me in.

For a brief moment I sh­it myself and started thinking what a bad idea it could turn out to be, probably all end in tears and started to think of how to politely say thanks for the offer but I need to get off home, luckily the huge er­ect­ion I had developed persuaded me otherwise and in I jumped

I dont really want to go into the gorey details as Im sure you can work them out for yourself, suffice to say it was a most pleasureable experience that I hope will be repeated

Work should be "interesting" on Tuesday

missimo Posted on 30/4 14:44
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Surely Bollox........surely?

Smifter Posted on 30/4 14:44
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

You top fibber monty

sasboro Posted on 30/4 14:46
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

hats off to him for a great wind up! up there with the best!

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 30/4 14:53
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Oh I knew everyone would be synical, I dont believe it myself now Im home, a bit like the Basel and Bucharest matches.

Im not really one to kiss and tell but no one knows the people involved and as Ive been asked to let people know how things turned out thats what Ive done.

Anyway, Ill say no more on the subject if Im going to get called a liar, I only wanted a bit of advice.

GtBB Posted on 30/4 15:07
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Classy finish, Montague. Close the bedroom door on the nosey fookers

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 30/4 15:24
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Indeed GtBB, it would be inappropriate to go into graphic detail in case some one twigged on to who it was

Valer Posted on 30/4 15:37
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

So in less than 10 days you turned from "I dont think I'm a "get yer rat out" on a first date type of guy" into a sexual predator eh?
And a junior member of staff has her own house with a Master bedroom?
You're obviously paying her too much!

--- Post edited by Valer on 30/4 18:26 ---

parmo_army Posted on 30/4 15:45
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Good work Monty, good work indeed

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 30/4 16:03
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

If youve got something to say Valer spit it out, Id hardly say Ive come out of this as a sexual predator, prey more like. And as for overpaying her what makes you think that exactly, because her house has a master bedroom. I thought all houses with more than one bedroom had a master bedroom, maybe Im wrong.

Thanks parmo army

Valer Posted on 30/4 16:32
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Oh dear - still hungover? You're a bit snappy today aren't you Longfellow?
Come on - you can't blame people for being cynical.
If it's true, Good on yer mate.
Will look again in 10 days to see if you've changed your mind on "Im not really one to kiss and tell". ;-)

--- Post edited by Valer on 30/4 16:38 ---

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 30/4 17:03
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Nah, not really Val, just putting you right

I knew Id spelt synical earlier as well

At the end of the day Ive experienced something that I thought was a myth thanks in part to some encouragement off here and letting people know as theyve asked me to. If the pictures of the night out were more anonymous I'd put them on here (supposing I can work out how to do it) but I think the ladies in question could be recognised and therefore could end in tears so Id best not.

Valer Posted on 30/4 17:16
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Ladies?!! In the "loose" sense of the word I presume?!
Was going to point out that you'd spelt cynical incorrectly, but thought you might bite my head off again!
What the hell are you going to do on Tuesday? Will they kiss and tell?
Think your next topic should be "How do you face work when you're senior management and you've just had a threesome with the office juniors." Should create some interest!

--- Post edited by Valer on 30/4 18:28 ---

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 30/4 17:26
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Youll know if I bite your head off

As for Tuesday, Ill play it by ear, no point worrying about what might happen and I havent done anything wrong as such.

If they kiss and tell it will probably up my street cred in the office and the only downside I can see is it being a bit awkward and having to put up with being the topic of office gossip which doesnt really bother me.

Valer Posted on 30/4 17:36
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Not done anything wrong? Which school of management skills do you subscibe to? Send me a copy pronto!
Suppose they will be the only losers - Office slags V Management super stud. If they start being awkward just sack them!

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 30/4 17:52
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Management super stud, I like it

MsCurly Posted on 30/4 17:56
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Good lord!

A man of your age! You'll give yourself a heart attack!

How kinky.

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 30/4 18:08
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Im open to suggestions for a better way to go MsC

tony_block19 Posted on 30/4 18:20
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Fukin' get up ya, Monty!!!
Well played, hats off to you.

CrazyL Posted on 30/4 18:29
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Has anybody else started re-reading this thread looking for glaring inconsistencies in Monty's story? I am such a cynical man! If this really happened (I'm sorry Monty I'm very sceptical) then

a) I'm very jealous
b) I'd be cacking myself waiting for their cous de gras at back at work

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 30/4 18:36
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

I cant believe how many people on here are like the press, building me up just to knock me down.

perhaps you might of hit the nail on the head with the green eyed monster Crazy ?

MsCurly Posted on 30/4 18:41
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

I'm sure anything that I suggest would be way inferior, monters.

You do know however than unless you keep up this cassanova lifestyle, your sexlife will be one disappointment after another?

I think you ought to think about next time getting another man involved, or perhaps a couple of hamsters.

You'll soon be desensitised to normal sex and will have to have extreme 'whiteknuckle' nooky to satisfy your perverted and lusty needs.

Heed my warning dear, you're one small step away from shemale s and m orgy madness.

MsCurly Posted on 30/4 18:43
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Btw.......were you good?

One woman can be hard enough to satisfy, but two?

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 30/4 18:48
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

I believe I was adequte due to there being more viagra than vodka in my glass

So whats this shemale s and m orgy madness all about and how long ago did you get into it ?

mickbrown Posted on 30/4 18:50
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Monty you fibber.

How come then if you were "living the dream", you were posting on here at midnight on Friday.

Good yarn though.

MsCurly Posted on 30/4 18:51
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Pretty much straight after my hormone treatment and boob job.

CrazyL Posted on 30/4 18:54
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Defo jealous Monts if it's true! Can't get my head round a peck on the cheek one week, cos she's not that kinda girl, to full blown threesome the following Friday!!

swordtrombonefish Posted on 30/4 19:05
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Fooking hell Monty - I reckon you should get in the office on Tuesday and do a lap of honour.

Boro85 Posted on 30/4 19:06
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

400

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 30/4 19:11
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Can you point me in the direction of that Mick cos if its true someones hacked my account and Ill want it sorting as its probably illeagal and theyll be traceable through their IP address.

swordtrombonefish Posted on 30/4 19:12
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

This has 1000 nailed on, if not 2000

BTW Mc Curly, do not be frightening our hero, troilism is good for you, well certainly for your ego.

mickbrown Posted on 30/4 19:12
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Chaps, he's fibbing - he was on here at midnight on Friday with sad sacks like me.

But, full marks for spinning the yarn

mickbrown Posted on 30/4 19:18
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Monty - I owe you an apology.

Its was MontagueWithnail on here at mdnight on Friday, not you, you lucky, lucky bugger.

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 30/4 19:19
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Mick, look up 2 posts.

or are you getting your Montys mixed up ?

Trotsky4u Posted on 30/4 19:19
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Check out this post then:- Tabloid Press from MontagueWithnail Posted on 28/4 23:02

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 30/4 19:22
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Cheers Mick

trotsky, what is your post about ?

mickbrown Posted on 30/4 19:26
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

No worries Monty

I remember reading the other Monty's posts on Friday night and thinking to myself things musn't have gone to plan. How wrong I was.

Still think a more detailed description is in order, in a letter to Reader's Wives stylee

neiltrodden Posted on 30/4 19:26
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

It's about trotski's inability to READ!

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 30/4 19:32
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

My lips are sealed Mick, not really my style, especially as there a chance identities could be revealed.

Youre not wrong there neil

Get_your_rat_out Posted on 30/4 19:39
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

your full of shoite monty

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 30/4 20:51
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Fair enough Ratboy

boro74 Posted on 30/4 22:04
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

I'm sure this will turn up as a story line in some TV soap.

But come on Monty. The least you can do is tell us which one you "pleasured" first. Surely that's not too much to ask.

Posted on 30/4 22:09
&lt;no subject&gt;

This post was removed by a site administrator

Boro85 Posted on 30/4 22:11
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

jones40 Posted on 30/4 22:09 Email this Message | Edit
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
please delete this post, its sh=ite






Shall i?
Well, if you want me to jonesy

--- Post edited by Boro85 on 30/4 22:23 ---

jax_1 Posted on 30/4 22:20
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

and who is Jones40 precisely? Some noob/troll no doubt!







Well, you did exactly as he asked Mr 85

--- Post edited by jax_1 on 30/4 22:27 ---

stewboss Posted on 1/5 12:54
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Monty's thread has died a death.

I guess this means that nobody believes him?

The_Downing_Wave Posted on 1/5 13:19
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Just spent ages reading this.

Can't make up my mind if I believe it or not, but I really really want to.

Gives hope to us all, well played Monty.

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 1/5 14:45
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

I knew I should of made something up like..........

we went out, I made a pass, she laughed, I went home.

It's only the non believers in threesomes happening that are synical(sic), I'd of been the same myself a week ago.

I wonder if itll happen again, find out how the land lies tomorrow I expect

Stampys_left_knacker Posted on 1/5 23:22
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Don't forget to tell us how work went on tuesday monty...

Lefty3668 Posted on 2/5 9:52
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Quality entertainment!

Is it just me that doesn't care if Monty's making it up?

Spoff_MFC Posted on 2/5 10:01
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

I do beleive it was I that suggested this became a threesome. I want some credit Monty.

Although I hope you have not blown the chance of future marriage to R...

GrumpyOldGit Posted on 2/5 10:05
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Let's keep this hoofed until after work today and then we can find out how it went. Like Lefty, I don't care if this is a wind-up, it's great reading.

scuzzmonster Posted on 2/5 10:07
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

The day of reckoning - where art thou, Monty?

Lefty3668 Posted on 2/5 10:08
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

What's 'M' like bi the way?

bororeddaz Posted on 2/5 10:08
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

and heres me thinking I had an action packed couple of days, putting up a shed and tidying the garage.
Ohhhh the joys of married life

Marlon_D Posted on 2/5 10:15
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Jesus, I didn't get into work on Friday due to some serious celebrating and I've just caught up with this thread.

Monty - I believe you and even if it was meaningless sex with no feeling you have still nailed 2 birds in one sitting. Quality.

grantus Posted on 2/5 10:32
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Well bloody done Monty. Good lad. *Standing ovation*

I don't see why anyone would disbelieve him, unless they have never been or know of anyone who has been in a similar situation. Believe me, it happens all the time.

They love it.

mickbrown Posted on 2/5 10:38
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Ok then, hand up who else has had a threesome?


*Sits on hands and sulks.

boroboy75 Posted on 2/5 10:39
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Good story Walter Mitty, I mean Montague.

boroboy75 Posted on 2/5 10:39
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Good story Walter Mitty, I mean Montague.

grantus Posted on 2/5 10:43
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

mick, I think you'll find that the type of folk that have threesomes aren't generally the type of folk that crow about it too loudly. Those who crow about it too loudly, probably find that its a once in a lifetime experience. Discretion in said individuals is usually the way.

What happens in the bedroom, stays in the bedroom.

Have I?

No comment.

boroboy75 Posted on 2/5 10:47
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Doesn't anyone else find it remarkable that in the space of eight or nine days that Monty has gone from what seems like a middle-aged bloke who hasn't got his dick wet for ages, to a rampant fannymagnet?

Alastasia Posted on 2/5 10:49
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Grantus is right. It's private. So, no comment from me.

But, it was excellent, every time :)

mufflar Posted on 2/5 11:04
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

grantus - vvanking with both hands doesn't constitute a threesome ;-)

grantus Posted on 2/5 12:28
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Not even when they belonged to your mother and your missus?

Valer Posted on 2/5 18:37
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Grantus, I'd edit that if I were you - I know it's a joke, but we've had enough nasty comments about interfamily sexual activity.

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 2/5 20:35
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Well today came and went without incident which I found quite strange, "R" and "M" havent mentioned the weekend in the slightest, been their usual friendly selves but thats it, "R" definitely a little stand off ish tho, no touchy feely, no cornering me in the coffee room, nothing.

I might drop a hint tomorrow about another night out to "R" to see what sort of response I get, there again maybe I should leave well alone and put it down to experience as Im sure theres no long term future in it.

boro74 Posted on 2/5 20:45
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Yeah, but which one did you "pleasure" first?

manboobs69 Posted on 2/5 20:58
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Sounds to me that it was just an office fling and part of it was the chase,the flirting and lots of drinks

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 2/5 21:06
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Im not actually sure 74, it was too dark.

manboobs69 Posted on 2/5 21:09
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

If it was dark how do you know where you were putting your bits. Are you sure there were no labradors involved?

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 2/5 21:11
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

There were no dogs in that house booby, just pussy

boro74 Posted on 2/5 21:12
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Maybe that's why "R" is sulking.

broady91 Posted on 2/5 21:34
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Were all liking montys story
We all hate the geordies
RandM they got real horny
He went and got his end away!

(tune:amarillo)

--- Post edited by broady91 on 2/5 21:34 ---

grantus Posted on 2/5 21:40
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Valer, chill out lad. I know when the line has been crossed and as far as that scallywag mufflar is concerned, I'm not even close

Row_7 Posted on 3/5 16:55
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

I can't help wondering if it was 'M' who was after Monty all along and 'R' was just the bait.
You know how devious women can be - after all if 'R' really fancied him - would she be so keen on having her mate tagging along all night?
Unless of course they regularly indulge in such surburban antics

manboobs69 Posted on 3/5 20:27
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

So have you asked them about the infamous night in question and if it wil be repeated this friday?

Spoff_MFC Posted on 4/5 14:09
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

broady91's song has to be sung in Eindhoven.

And Monty, if the girls start to ignore you send a link to this thread to them both.

More action of this goes round the office.

You are the innocent party here, you have done everything by the book. You have nothing to lose.

VodkaByName Posted on 4/5 14:19
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

This has the makings of Rita, Sue and Bob Too, The Sequel!!

Fancy a jump..........

tony_block19 Posted on 4/5 14:25
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

VodkaByName, as sad as my life is, I actually thought this the other night, and thought "I must put that on the Board", obviously I forgot but you've just reminded me.

R: Is that all M's getting???

Monty: I thought I were great!!



broady91 Posted on 4/5 19:59
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Spoff:

The_Commisar Posted on 4/5 20:04
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

hang on a minute......hang on !!!!!
Coga may have sussed this out
did anyone else see this on his thread ?

Link: the scarfs a give away !!!!!

fishface101 Posted on 4/5 21:28
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

I cant believe this thread is still going

Well done monty you can tick that one off your things i'd like to do before i die list

stipey Posted on 4/5 21:41
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

"Well done monty you can tick that one off your things i'd like to do before i die list"

what, feed a bunch of sad old perverts a load of b_ullshit about nobbing 2 girls on one night?

collo1875 Posted on 5/5 0:43
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

what a story
took me nearly 2 hours to read but worth it
well done monty top man
plenty of r and m and not one mention of a S or T

pnefan Posted on 5/5 1:03
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

No offence, but I'm not at all sure that I believe you Monty.

However, this has been a hugely amusing thread so I'll give you the benefit of the doubt!

Can't help wishing you'd spun it out a bit more by introducing a twist to the proceedings - you could've claimed to have caught a STD and not be sure whether you got it off R or M and asked the board here for advice on what to do. Or you could've claimed to be being stalked by an irate Mr R or Mr M or summat.

Anyway, now that you've got your oats at least I can focus on the play-offs!

;-)

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 5/5 21:37
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Well things seem to have taken a change for the worse, Im more than a tad confused, all week whilst nothing has been said about last Fridays encounter specifically a couple of in-jokes have been passed backwards and forth between the three of us which put me in an optimitic frame of mind, especially since last night when "R" told me another night out was on and we were meeting in Issac's after work.

To say I was a bit disappointed when I turned up and there was double figures of staff there would be more than an understatement, I felt like a spare pr­ick at wedding sat opposite "R" and "M" flirting with each other all night, although to the casual observer it would appear that it was two mates in a group of friends having a good time.

Eventually I realised that last Friday was a one off as I was given at best lip service when trying to strike up any sort of conversation, so I thought sack it, made my excuses an left.

Someone said earlier that regular passion wouldnt be the same after that experience, Im starting to think theyre right.

Anyway, sod it, nice while it lasted but Im starting to think it was a bit of fun at my expense although I did enjoy it, just cant believe how much they kept me at arms length tonight after the way they were in Yarm and back at "R"'s

Right, Im off to subscribe to Television X

northeastcorner Posted on 5/5 21:44
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

this is the first time i have visited this thread, and, as an ignorant youth, do not have the patience to read all threads (458?)

any chance of a "previously on monty's thread" summary, because i read the original post, and found it pretty interesting

--- Post edited by northeastcorner on 5/5 21:44 ---

parmo_army Posted on 5/5 21:54
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Just for you northeastcorner.

Old Monty managed to get himself a bit of threeway action with a couple of younger than him lasses from his work after previously being a tad nervous about asking one of them out.

THE END!

TS3_6RS Posted on 5/5 21:58
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

For you northeatscorner...

Previously on Monty4...

R - Flirts with ML at work.
ML - Why thankyou. [Leaves puzzled. Consults FMTTM for advice due to age and seniority at work gap].
[FMTTM reply - fill your boots].
R and ML go out - other work colleagues there. ML thinks false expectations. R gets trapped in bog/R hopes to lure M into bog.
ML and R share taxi - nowt happens but R implies "maybe some other time".
R arranges next outing.
ML discovers next outing not cosy affair was expecting as M will also be there. FMTTM "experts" expect threesome.
ML goes anyway.
ML gets oats x 2.
Back at work, back to normal.
President of USA is behind it all.

northeastcorner Posted on 5/5 21:59
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

thanks.

congratulations. thats some achievement. are you having a victory parade?

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 5/5 22:00
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

"President of USA is behind it all"

Bush was definitely not behind me

northeastcorner Posted on 5/5 22:03
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace


NorfolknGood Posted on 5/5 22:15
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Correction:
president of USA is between ML and the laydees.

Spoff_MFC Posted on 10/5 11:26
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Let me see if I have got this right.

1st we have R and M, with Bush behind them and Monty behind him...

broady91 Posted on 13/5 22:32
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

I believed Monty on all of this but on my way back from Holland i was reading an old Zoo mag(i needed a get me up) and there was these 2 les' in it(1 who's name began with R) and they were saying how they got R's ex-boyfriend to join in with them as a sort of break-up sex! Quality or what!

Smifter Posted on 22/5 19:53
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

hoof we will get you your half century yet

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 22/5 19:57
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Itll never happen

Im quite amazed the way it developed really, not what was originally envisioned but still seemed to work.

thesonofgod Posted on 22/5 19:57
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

half century is fifty is it not?

Smifter Posted on 22/5 19:58
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

The Big Brother thread is catching up, and its not in the same league

lostmylipstickinrome Posted on 22/5 19:59
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Let's not argue about numbers - Monty didn't !

MsCurly Posted on 22/5 20:01
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Delivered the lot this thread.

Even the only ending that would not have been an anti-climax, almost damn near perfect.

The only thing missing was the spanking.

lostmylipstickinrome Posted on 22/5 20:13
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

I'm sure it's only a matter of time before Monty adds another string to his bow - I've not really got the hang of this double entendre thingy!

manboobs69 Posted on 22/5 20:16
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

there is still not an end to this story. How is it at work? Do you ignore each other or go for a quickie in the stock room?

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 22/5 20:21
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

The biggest mistake I made was posting this during the McClaren for England speculation and our cup runs coming to a climax.

Its quite ironic that I never actually managed to steer it in the direction I wanted to but still ended up with a monster on my hands.

Quite a sucessful failure really

deano2k12 Posted on 27/5 23:24
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

its all lies........monty is a just a fookin dreamer.

u sad old fooker.....get a grip

Spoff_MFC Posted on 28/6 15:22
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Monty has been quiet for a while.

Smifter Posted on 14/7 23:53
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

You said you were gonna make love this evening? tell all

Smifter Posted on 1/10 20:15
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Hoof

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 1/10 20:22
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

I took deanos advice and got a grip and made love all night, I was fantasic

YodaTheCoder Posted on 24/11 8:29
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Saw this...

Link: ...and thought of you.

john_lillie Posted on 6/12 0:21
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Huth!

kazzaxxx Posted on 6/12 0:26
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

why ??????

sad_man Posted on 6/12 20:38
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Just 'came' across this.

This is Bull$h! t.

For a grown man to ask for advice about a relationship from a football messageboard is unlikely

To have a threesome is uncommon

To have a threesome with two young ladies is even less likely

To have the whole story of a grown man who asks for advice about a relationship from a football messageboard which just happens to end in a threesome with two young ladies recorded on the internet for all to read is beyond the wildest dreams of any adult (well maybe someone can really imagine this!)

Oh and one of the posters even mentioned the idea of a threesome (hmm could that have given the 'long' fellow ideas?)

Just goes to show what people are prepared to believe.

Not me.

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 6/12 20:51
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

8 months on and still going strong

It'd be nice if another 14 wise after the fact posters could come along and punt me up to 500, then my life would be complete.

EdithGrove Posted on 6/12 21:48
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Monty Shortmember.

The idea behind this topic defo deserves a 500.

sad_man Posted on 7/12 6:06
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Yeah. Very interesting and quite believable if it had a 'normal' ending - happy/sad. It could well be true up to the end of the first date.

In fact, the amazing ending is quite possibly a cover for the real ending: it didn't work out and Monty didn't want to admit to his 'short-comings.'

Alternatively, it went well and he's now in a real relationship and he wants to hide its roots as to avoid embarrassing his new lover.

But it should be studied for a PhD about people's reactions to this kind of story and how the storyteller can manipulate the story based on feedback so that it ties in with people's expectations.

Monty Python or the Full Monty?

Long_Live_Zombies Posted on 7/12 10:06
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

There is obviously some influences of reading too many 70's wank mags as they all seemed to have had stories like this, or so somebody told me

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 7/12 12:25
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Cheers Edith, its nice to be appreciated.

Some valid points youve got there sad_man but not quite hit the nail on the head. I had a theme in mind and did change it when someone mentioned a threesome, on reflection a step too far, wether my original idea would of got more mileage Im not sure. Care to have a stab at where I was going to take it ?

Annual subscription to Knave Razzle and Mayfair LLZ

dundeejock Posted on 4/1 23:21
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

thought I'd Hoof this to get all the new posters views on the subject-me I cant get enough of it

Plus it might get Monty back in top 10

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 4/1 23:26
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Rock n Roll

Oway rayFFS

Bring it on baby

ray192 Posted on 5/1 0:02
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Monty

FFS .

kazzaxxx Posted on 5/1 0:04
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

you tell him ray

ray192 Posted on 6/1 9:11
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Kazza

Morning dear .

--- Post edited by ray192 on 6/1 9:11 ---

markofdboro Posted on 6/1 10:47
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

now this is homoSexual harrassment in the cyberspace

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 6/1 10:49
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Listen Mark

Bumming is only pieces of skin touching.

no different to shaking hands really

damit1968 Posted on 6/1 11:35
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

The video clip that Yoda attached a few responses ago was hilarious, but I couldn't tell if it was genuine or taken from a Canadian sketch show!

I hear you have a fat cock? Expect to see that piece on Channel 4 this year...

MontagueLongfellow Posted on 30/1 23:07
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

3 more posts gets me back on the front page of Block17 (well 2 after this one), bast­ard ray192FFS with his bat and ball threads, see what happens when you fook with me, hasnt been seen for weeks.

hoof this or FOOKIN ELSE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

collo1875 Posted on 30/1 23:21
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

This was the 1st story i read on fly me and got me hooked on it and ive just sat and read it again
i forgot it was right near the final

onthemap Posted on 30/1 23:21
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Dont know why like, fookin schite you spout.

sad_man Posted on 31/1 3:20
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Good on you for being honest. Congrats on the LongThread LongFella!

boro74 Posted on 20/3 20:42
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

Great thread, this one.

borobadge Posted on 4/8 12:02
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

yep...block 17 is back working..hoof!

borobadge Posted on 4/8 12:03
re: Sexual harrassment in the workplace

yep...block 17 is back working..hoof!