| DrBuck Posted on 19/7 0:06 | |
| Farting Etiquette | |
A little bit of background first. When I was a kid if my Mam or Dad farted it was just ignored, no comment made, it was as if it hadn't happened. Consequently I grew up thinking this was the norm and was how everyone treated a fart. When I fart now, whether at work or at home someone invariably makes some kind of comment which draws attention to the occurrence. What I want to know is why do they do that, if they ignored it ther wouldn't be a problem would there? | |
| Croasy Posted on 19/7 0:36 | |
| re: Farting Etiquette | |
farting is seen as bloody disgusting by some people matey, however its only natural that you have to fart now and again! | |
| Smifter Posted on 19/7 0:38 | |
| re: Farting Etiquette | |
One of my ex bfs farted in bed, thats a disgrace I think, as if I didnt even say ANYTHING about it | |
| Big_Ted_Church Posted on 19/7 0:39 | |
| re: Farting Etiquette | |
It shows a lack of manners farting in public. If it bothers you that people draw attention to you, dont do it. If you cant help it, join the real world, and either embrace the fart showing your pride in such a noise/smell, or stifle it, and then be quick to be the first to draw attention to it, by screwing your face up, pointing at someone nearby, and shouting 'OH FOR F***S SAKE!' --- Post edited by Big_Ted_Church on 19/7 0:40 --- | |
| coheadboro Posted on 19/7 0:40 | |
| re: Farting Etiquette | |
Unless it stinks then people can fook off. You can always try the method of easing it out to create as little noise as possible. When with mates it is advisable to do the loudest and smelliest fart possible and be proud of it | |
| wheelz Posted on 19/7 0:40 | |
| re: Farting Etiquette | |
Ah! but, were you in the same bed at the same time as said rectal explosion, smiffs?? | |
| Croasy Posted on 19/7 0:42 | |
| re: Farting Etiquette | |
smifter did he fart and then throw your head under the duvet cover??? | |
| TeessideCleveland Posted on 19/7 0:42 | |
| re: Farting Etiquette | |
My wife farted and said 'Stop that TC!' I said 'Certainly Mrs TC. Which way did it go?' | |
| neiltrodden Posted on 19/7 0:43 | |
| re: Farting Etiquette | |
Save them up for later and then develop the "Fart Walk" | |
| Smifter Posted on 19/7 0:44 | |
| re: Farting Etiquette | |
I was there at same time, no no head under the covers  Still disgusting tho!
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| neiltrodden Posted on 19/7 0:44 | |
| re: Farting Etiquette | |
eg: left *fart* right *fart* Repeat .. Until FartDone | |
| TeessideCleveland Posted on 19/7 0:45 | |
| re: Farting Etiquette | |
Did he follow through? | |
| wheelz Posted on 19/7 0:45 | |
| re: Farting Etiquette | |
Mrs wheelz said "...don't you dare fart in front of me!" I said: "sorry, pet! Didn't know it was your turn!"
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| Smifter Posted on 19/7 0:45 | |
| re: Farting Etiquette | |
No he didnt | |
| neiltrodden Posted on 19/7 0:46 | |
| re: Farting Etiquette | |
I was once eating a girlfriends poo and she farted. The dirty bitch! *sickasfuck joke disclaimer* | |
| neiltrodden Posted on 19/7 0:46 | |
| re: Farting Etiquette | |
*leaves board* | |
| Stepper_T Posted on 19/7 0:47 | |
| re: Farting Etiquette | |
Smifter farted next to me in the Woody, I didnt say anything. | |
| barca_shirt_for_sale Posted on 19/7 0:47 | |
| re: Farting Etiquette | |
smifter judging by the people you talk to on this site, I assume you're very young, like 18 or 19. You seem to talk about being in bed quite a lot. | |
| Smifter Posted on 19/7 0:48 | |
| re: Farting Etiquette | |
You have just "kissed" goodbye to you sweaty drunken snog now 
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| Smifter Posted on 19/7 0:48 | |
| re: Farting Etiquette | |
No I dont Barca  People talk about that to me alot I'll have you know, and I do officially become a lady next week [:O}
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| Stepper_T Posted on 19/7 0:54 | |
| re: Farting Etiquette | |
 Blown it again.
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| TeessideCleveland Posted on 19/7 0:56 | |
| re: Farting Etiquette | |
I thought she was talking to Barca | |
| parmos_r_us Posted on 19/7 9:55 | |
| re: Farting Etiquette | |
I always like the Fart Walk an amusing night club activity. Packed dance floor - Fart Walk - Turn round and watch the fallout. | |
| Boro_Owl Posted on 19/7 9:59 | |
| re: Farting Etiquette | |
Good farting etiquette is to step into the smoking room and do it, nobody will notice the smell. Alternatively, use the toilets, or step outside "for a breath of fresh air". | |
| wheelz Posted on 19/7 10:06 | |
| re: Farting Etiquette | |
Went to the doc's, told him I had excessive wind, and farted when I walked. He said: "show me", so walked across the surgery... fart, fart, fart,fart he said "stop! turn around and walk back" fart, fart, fart,fart then he said "ok! thats enough, wait there" and went to a cupboard, and brought out a long pole with a hook on the end. I enquired apprehensively "you're not gonna shove that up my ass, are ya doc?" he answered "NO! I'M GONNA OPEN THE BLEEDIN' WINDOW -- YOU FRIGG'N STINK!!" I know its an old 'un, but........... 
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| BoroTommo Posted on 19/7 10:06 | |
| re: Farting Etiquette | |
I fuching LOVE the topic of farting. Probably my favourite subject. I've posted this before, but the memory remains. One evening, sat on the armchair with my little lad on my lap (He was about 6 months old), and following a stout chicken madras, I let loose the noisiest and smelliest fart of my professional career. I laughed and the boy laughed. The missus entered the room and came over asking what was so funny. She caught a whiff of the odour and, assuming it emanated from the boy's nappy, bent over and took a complete lungfull of the rancid scent. She nearly choked, and snatched the lad away from me whilst moaning about me, "not even caring that my son was dirty" and left the room. A couple of minutes later she returned with the lad and just called a "dirty disgusing bastid", which just made me grin even more
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| BoroTommo Posted on 19/7 10:11 | |
| re: Farting Etiquette | |
Oh, and if you really dislike someone at work, fart in their packed lunch box and put the lid back on quick. If you're very lucky, you might be around to witness them open it and exclaim "God, fuching egg again!" | |
| TheBoy999 Posted on 19/7 10:21 | |
| re: Farting Etiquette | |
Our lass farted in bed and the smell was so bad it woke me up, absolutely amazing i was woken up by a smell! | |
| flyermetothemoon Posted on 19/7 11:14 | |
| re: Farting Etiquette | |
You dont really know a person until your on farting terms (especially the opposite sex) | |
| grantus Posted on 19/7 11:23 | |
| re: Farting Etiquette | |
A dog I once had, Rocky, used to fart so loud he used to wake himself up. | |
| wheelz Posted on 19/7 11:26 | |
| re: Farting Etiquette | |
I had an ex-wife with similar........!! | |
| OhWell Posted on 19/7 11:31 | |
| re: Farting Etiquette | |
With this recent spell of hot weather there are a lot of desk fans in the office. I reckon if I lined them up right I could fart and blame it on someone 50 feet away. | |
