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happy_horse Posted on 2/10 15:01
Single Mothers...

your views?

Shaun71 Posted on 2/10 15:02
re: Single Mothers...

As opposed to double ones?

Smifter Posted on 2/10 15:02
re: Single Mothers...

What about them?

phill6 Posted on 2/10 15:04
re: Single Mothers...

???

happy_horse Posted on 2/10 15:05
re: Single Mothers...

well does a child who only has one parent get the same benefits as one with two

Buddy Posted on 2/10 15:07
re: Single Mothers...

I don't think the child gets any benefit at all, I think the parent gets it. I assume this is because the post office counters are too high for the children.

YodaTheCoder Posted on 2/10 15:07
re: Single Mothers...

Yes.

Nedkat Posted on 2/10 15:07
re: Single Mothers...

It's more a case of getting on with what your given.

kenny_from_the_buffs Posted on 2/10 15:08
re: Single Mothers...

As I understand it singel mothers get a lot of benefits.

All joking aside, here is another "stalking horse" for the middle classes to get on their high horses about. Oooh unmarried mothers isn't it shocking and they are all chavs. Sweeping generalisations a go go.

London_Boro Posted on 2/10 15:09
re: Single Mothers...

They have a tough job!!! I imagine it's hard enough with 2 parents sometimes.

boroboy75 Posted on 2/10 15:10
re: Single Mothers...

Anyway, has anyone else heard of the phrase 'Pram face', or is it just a southern saying?

zoec Posted on 2/10 15:10
re: Single Mothers...

Why/what do you want to know, happy_horse?

SplendidStuff Posted on 2/10 15:11
re: Single Mothers...

Fathers that run out on their kids, whats your views ?

Smifter Posted on 2/10 15:11
re: Single Mothers...

I watched a documentary called "pram face" about single mothers the other week. Havent got it as easy as some think!

littledick Posted on 2/10 15:11
re: Single Mothers...

Most of them are single because they're not old enough to get married

zoec Posted on 2/10 15:12
re: Single Mothers...

What does pram face mean?

Smifter Posted on 2/10 15:13
re: Single Mothers...

Exactly Splendid, lads that leave girls on their own after finding out their pregnant? your views

SplendidStuff Posted on 2/10 15:14
re: Single Mothers...

It means a lifeless expression caused by the apparent lack of respite from drudgery in their lives.

--- Post edited by SplendidStuff on 2/10 15:15 ---

zoec Posted on 2/10 15:18
re: Single Mothers...

Poor things. I think it's a real shame if circumstances mean that you can't enjoy your kids.

How patronising did that sound. I meant, poor girls/women.

--- Post edited by zoec on 2/10 15:18 ---

Nedkat Posted on 2/10 15:21
re: Single Mothers...

I'm a father who got divorced, and it was the hardest most heart breaking thing that I had to do. I don't think I "ran out" on anybody, the marriage was over and I got the hell out of it. I made absolutely sure those two children were well looked after, and I also made sure I saw them as often as possible. My son is now 26, he started a new job today in his first position as a Quantity Surveyor. I spoke to him yesterday, and he's coming to visit me on Nov 5th for two weeks.
Single parents have an extremely difficult job to do. It's hard enough when there's two parents, but at least you can share some of the responsibilities. In fact, every parent has my utmost respect .. (except those one's who name their daughter Britney) ...

kazzaxxx Posted on 2/10 15:23
re: Single Mothers...

whats wrong with britney

zoec Posted on 2/10 15:24
re: Single Mothers...

Nedkat, I think splendid and smifter are talking about the "eats, shoots and leaves" variety of father, rather than a marriage breakdown. Congratulations to your son, btw.

SplendidStuff Posted on 2/10 15:26
re: Single Mothers...

sorry Nedkat i wasnt implying that all fathers who dont live with their kids are responsible, i just meant that the actual discussion of single mothers and 'pram face' is a generalisation, the same as fathers who run out.

Im aware that these situations are not simple and never black and white, so the original point was offensive to me.

Nedkat Posted on 2/10 15:26
re: Single Mothers...

Thank you, Zoec.

Those people deserve to be slathered in maple syrup, and nailed to an ants nest .. Despicable !!

KENDAL Posted on 2/10 15:27
re: Single Mothers...

If a female chooses to have a baby out of wedlock then that is their choice. Lots of proffesional woman do it and employ a nanny.
I think the child does tend to suffer because a child needs the direction that both parents offer in different ways.
There probably are single girls that get pregnant just so the can get a flat and live off the benefits but then find out to their horror that it isn't easy to bring up a child alone.

boroboy75 Posted on 2/10 15:27
re: Single Mothers...

Nedkat, does that apply to people who've been shagging elsewhere, leading to a break-up?

happy_horse Posted on 2/10 15:28
re: Single Mothers...

I meant single mothers who are single right from the start not single due to a divorce

SouthernSmogette Posted on 2/10 15:29
re: Single Mothers...

NedKat......is your son single? ;o)

mickbrown Posted on 2/10 15:30
re: Single Mothers...

Single right from the start?

Surely they were once part of a couple, even if it's only for a couple of minutes? Unless you're talking about Mary?* Or turkey basters?

*crosses himself like a good catholic lad.

SplendidStuff Posted on 2/10 15:30
re: Single Mothers...

Its not that simple happy_horse.

So in your world single women wouldnt have sex?

mozza_1 Posted on 2/10 15:31
re: Single Mothers...

"eats, shoots and leaves" type of father lol!!!

i was 19 when my mrs fell preggers with our first i stayed with her we will have been married 3 years on new years eve

Nedkat Posted on 2/10 15:33
re: Single Mothers...

He is single, I asked him about that yesterday, and he said he was still playing it fast and loose. "A couple of ladies on the go, but no-one special" .. He's an extremely good looking fella as well, if I say so meself !!

Nedkat Posted on 2/10 15:38
re: Single Mothers...

Nedkat, does that apply to people who've been shagging elsewhere, leading to a break-up? ..

There's so many different angles, different reasons, different ways to look at all of this. I was married for ten years, and I never shagged out of watch, and I believe my ex-wife didn't either. I don't particularly like to see people being unloyal to each other, it's something I have never done, and will never do.

happy_horse Posted on 2/10 15:39
re: Single Mothers...

RE: Nedkat

No, what i mean is a woman who decides to keep the unborn baby after the relationship has broken down

zoec Posted on 2/10 15:42
re: Single Mothers...

What would you suggest she does with the baby, happy_horse?

happy_horse Posted on 2/10 15:42
re: Single Mothers...

Whatever is best for her

SouthernSmogette Posted on 2/10 15:43
re: Single Mothers...

zoec - very good point....

NedKat - well....I look like.....Pat Butcher, as we all know, but I have a very successful bookies. Fix us up?

KENDAL Posted on 2/10 15:44
re: Single Mothers...

I find it hard to grasp that a woman could give up her child because of a breakup, I can't imagine the torment they would have to go through.

Nedkat Posted on 2/10 15:47
re: Single Mothers...

Smogette, let me have your numbers, age, weight, figure etc .. and send me a photo, and I'll give him a shout.

happy_horse Posted on 2/10 15:49
re: Single Mothers...

Im not suggesting a mother should give up her child because of a break up, if the child is already born i wouldnt expect any mother to give it up

SouthernSmogette Posted on 2/10 15:50
re: Single Mothers...

To be fair NedKat....although he sounds like a right catch, I'm afraid Monsieur Smogette may get a bit narked.

I'm sure if he's as sound as his old man, he'll make some young thing a lovely husband and all that....

Be-atch

x

Nedkat Posted on 2/10 15:52
re: Single Mothers...

Ah, the Monsieur Smogette ... I understand !!

There's one thing I didn't tell you. Although he was born in Dumfermline, he's lived in Sunderland since he was eight ...

SouthernSmogette Posted on 2/10 15:55
re: Single Mothers...

We all have our crosses Mr NedKat - I myself was born in Tubercurry.....I'm therefore doomed to be a drunken bog monster.

Sunderland is a bit of a drive from me to be honest.

The_Commisar Posted on 2/10 15:56
re: Single Mothers...

Smoggette - I thought you were having to beat Lisbers with a stick to keep him at bay ( a service which I believe he usually pays extra for)


Nedders - the Fife bit is fine, just means he's tight sod , as for the makem bit, have you considered dipping him in nitromorse ?

jonny_giles Posted on 2/10 15:56
re: Single Mothers...

On saturday down town, i saw 6 different ginger mums with dark skinned babies, no dads in sight.

boroboy75 Posted on 2/10 15:57
re: Single Mothers...

Smogette, you snared yourself a bloke?
Lisbon was considering splitting up with his imaginary girlfriend for a slice of you.

SouthernSmogette Posted on 2/10 15:58
re: Single Mothers...

I don't know what my allure is......I really don't!

zoec Posted on 2/10 15:59
re: Single Mothers...

I quite often walk through town with my son. I didn't realise that we had to go everywhere with his father to prove to complete strangers that he hasn't done a runner. My mistake.

Nedkat Posted on 2/10 15:59
re: Single Mothers...

Strangely, he tends to support Glasgow Rangers. Lovely bloke though, very caring and sensitive about things. Loves his family, and always shows his appreciation for all of his friends and relatives. I can't wait to see him again, we're going to have a right old reunion. I've started getting the beers in ready for the big thrash !!

SouthernSmogette Posted on 2/10 16:02
re: Single Mothers...

I want to come over for that reunion!

SouthernSmogette Posted on 2/10 16:03
re: Single Mothers...

I want to come over for that reunion!

BB75 - I'm sorry to break it to you in this fashion. Are you terribly heartbroken?

happy_horse Posted on 2/10 16:05
re: Single Mothers...

well this has gone completely off track

Smifter Posted on 2/10 16:05
re: Single Mothers...

So horsey when zoe asked what would you do with the baby, you answered whatever is best for her. What more is there to discuss then?

Nedkat Posted on 2/10 16:06
re: Single Mothers...

Last time he was here, he brought his mate with him. Now, I can sup better than most, but those two had me up all hours drinking and messing around. I was absolutely bloody exhausted after the first week, and I lent them my car so they could wander off down to the Keys, and I could get some sleep .. He's bringing me Mother with him this time !

happy_horse Posted on 2/10 16:07
re: Single Mothers...

I wanted other peoples views on the subject

jonny_giles Posted on 2/10 16:07
re: Single Mothers...

Are you ginger by any chance?

SouthernSmogette Posted on 2/10 16:08
re: Single Mothers...

Can she drink?

Smifter Posted on 2/10 16:09
re: Single Mothers...

I dont understand what exactly you want their views on. Single mothers exist yes, some out of choice and some not.

zoec Posted on 2/10 16:10
re: Single Mothers...

Is who ginger? I'm not, I'm blonde, so not one of the Middlesbrough 6.

happy_horse Posted on 2/10 16:13
re: Single Mothers...

I didnt realise me asking for other peoples views on a subject was so wrong

Nedkat Posted on 2/10 16:13
re: Single Mothers...

Oh aye, me mother can knock them back and kick her heels up like the best of 'em !

Smifter Posted on 2/10 16:13
re: Single Mothers...

What views? What bit about single mothers do you want views on?

jonny_giles Posted on 2/10 16:13
re: Single Mothers...

I think he just wants to know if single mums should get the help they do.
My mates girlfriend lives on her own with 2 kids in a 2 bed house, yet she can't get a bigger one until the daughter is 7 because different sex kids shouldn't share a bedroom then or something.
I think this is wrong.

zoec Posted on 2/10 16:14
re: Single Mothers...

But you haven't asked for any views!

SouthernSmogette Posted on 2/10 16:17
re: Single Mothers...

Mr Nedkat - I'm packing as I type......

Nedkat Posted on 2/10 16:19
re: Single Mothers...

OK .. I'll save you a seat by the pool

happy_horse Posted on 2/10 16:19
re: Single Mothers...

I think jonny_giles is the only person who has understood the whole thread.

Smifter Posted on 2/10 16:22
re: Single Mothers...

It all depends doesnt it. one good mother is better than 2 bad parents, just depends on peoples circumstances.

zoec Posted on 2/10 16:26
re: Single Mothers...

So this isn't about single mothers. It's about single mothers on benefits.

Smifter Posted on 2/10 16:30
re: Single Mothers...

Ahhhhh so he wanted a thread where we slag off girls who have got pregnant and now have to have some help off benefits, I see

happy_horse Posted on 2/10 16:40
re: Single Mothers...

Typical women responses

Smifter Posted on 2/10 16:41
re: Single Mothers...

Whats typical about them? I dont understand

happy_horse Posted on 2/10 16:41
re: Single Mothers...

You dont seem to understand much do you

SouthernSmogette Posted on 2/10 16:42
re: Single Mothers...

happy_horse......come on fella. Pull your frigging socks up.

zoec Posted on 2/10 16:43
re: Single Mothers...

You've lost me now...

Smifter Posted on 2/10 16:43
re: Single Mothers...

I understand that you were looking for a bite, and I took one big massive one *CHOMP*

happy_horse Posted on 2/10 16:44
re: Single Mothers...

I was looking to see if being a single mother is more acceptable in society these days

Nedkat Posted on 2/10 16:50
re: Single Mothers...

happy, as Smifter said earlier, surely it all depends on the circunstances.

happy_horse Posted on 2/10 16:53
re: Single Mothers...

I am talking about in genral and not everyones individual case of single motherhood

SouthernSmogette Posted on 2/10 16:54
re: Single Mothers...

Oh Bore off

Nedkat Posted on 2/10 16:54
re: Single Mothers...

Nah, your fishing for a ton !!

happy_horse Posted on 2/10 16:55
re: Single Mothers...

There is definetely something wrong with this boards mentality

SouthernSmogette Posted on 2/10 16:56
re: Single Mothers...

Yes.....yes you're right.

kermit_the_smog Posted on 2/10 16:57
re: Single Mothers...

My mams been a great single mother. Started with nowt when i was born and now has a management level job!

trodbitch Posted on 2/10 16:58
re: Single Mothers...

My mother brought me up for a few years as a single mum. To be honest, an absense of a father was better than that father being around as he was a wife-beating violent criminal.

As people have said, you make do with the circumstances that present themselves and get on with it as families come in all shapes and sizes.

capio Posted on 2/10 16:59
re: Single Mothers...

It is not specifically single mothers that are a problem, each person must be judged individually as circumstances are never the same.
However lazy good for nothing swineís who do f all, and just scrounge off society should be sent down the coal mines, regardless of age, sex, sexual orientation etc.

trodbitch Posted on 2/10 17:04
re: Single Mothers...

Regardless if any coal mines are still open?


Hang on, you just mean 'drop them down the shaft', don't you?

Nasty

capio Posted on 2/10 17:16
re: Single Mothers...

Good idea biatch.

I wish to make it clear I don't mean everybody just those lazy phuqs that hate working and would rather claim OUR money. Those who cannot find a job or cannot work for any reason are different.

MsCurly Posted on 2/10 18:26
re: Single Mothers...

I'm sure there are very few women out there that envisage themselves as being single mum's before the actuality of it.

Life sometimes throws the odd curve ball your way, it's how you handle it that really matters.

I wouldn't say that I'm proud to be a single parent, but I'm proud of my children because they're smart, polite, well mannered, loving kids.

I've been on benefits, for several years until I was in a position to be able to work. As far as I'm concerned I was more than entitled to those benefits for the years that I had worked previously and paid into our state system, so no qualms at all about collecting the money that myself and my children were entitled to.

Ideally it would have been great if my children had had a Dad around (he's around, but it's safe to say he's not much use) but there are so many derivations from 'the norm' in families today that there isn't the stigma attached to coming from a single parent family as there used to be. And rightly so.

All that really matters is the happiness and welfare of the babies. In my circumstances their welfare was greatly improved the day I told their Dad to sling his bloody hook.

--- Post edited by MsCurly on 2/10 18:27 ---

Corcaigh_the_Cat Posted on 2/10 18:38
re: Single Mothers...

single mothers are no different to us single dads

happy_horse Posted on 2/10 18:43
re: Single Mothers...

By single dad do you mean you live with your child without the mother and raise him/her on your own?

TeessideCleveland Posted on 2/10 18:44
re: Single Mothers...

I have single mother
And a single father

Corcaigh_the_Cat Posted on 2/10 18:47
re: Single Mothers...

that's right horse, but he's old enough to look after himself now

mickymac Posted on 2/10 19:05
re: Single Mothers...

Ms-curly,well done for brining your kids up well behaved,But why are you always being critical of your ex husbandsand/or parteners?.Surely it reflects badly on you for choosing to shack up and get pregnant by obvious twonk/s.

Smifter Posted on 2/10 19:08
re: Single Mothers...

Mickymac what an idiotic thing to say!

Oh by the way sometimes a girl finds out how much of an idiot their partner is when they actually become pregnant.

Lucky you if you have been able to foresee how all your partners were gonna turn out mickymac!

Boro_Owl Posted on 2/10 19:12
re: Single Mothers...

This subject isnt even worth discussion. Single mothers are very often the better parents out there for doing the job of 2 people. Well done to them in my opinion.

rutters Posted on 2/10 19:37
re: Single Mothers...

I my be wrong but I believe that what gets up peoples noses is not the women who have split from their partner and are bringing up children on their own (although I know a lot of men who believe they get a bad deal in thses circumstances)

What annoys people are the girls who get pregnant either deliberately or through lack of care. It is seen as an easy option rather than study/interview/disciplines of work. (an option obviously not open to teenage boys)

The cost on state/council is great not only in benefits, housing etc but also when the growing children suffer from lack of parental control.

I deal with a lot of women in this position who throw their hands up and say "What can I do? He's bigger than he!!" as soon as their son turns 11.

Smifter Posted on 2/10 19:43
re: Single Mothers...

"What annoys people are the girls who get pregnant either deliberately or through lack of care"

So there can't be an accident? When was it just the girls responsibility? What about the lads lack of care? How many married couples have children that werent planned, they arent frowned upon.

Turner_86 Posted on 2/10 19:44
re: Single Mothers...

99.

Nedkat Posted on 2/10 19:45
re: Single Mothers...

Do you make a hobby out of this, Happy Horse ?

There you go ... 100

rutters Posted on 2/10 19:56
re: Single Mothers...

Good points Smifter..yes there are accidents but that's not the case in a great deal of instances. I'm afraid that the female should carry most of the responsibility because females get most of the rights... rights=responsibilities

Also most married couples usually have one partner working and are therefore less of a financial burden on the state/council.

phill6 Posted on 2/10 19:58
re: Single Mothers...

my mum is a single parent

Smifter Posted on 2/10 20:04
re: Single Mothers...

I think in most situations from the points that have been made, when this situation arose its been an accident. "Women have more rights therefore more responsibilites", we will have to disagree on that one, both doing the deed, both persons responsibilities equally imo.

--- Post edited by Smifter on 2/10 20:09 ---

boronutter Posted on 2/10 20:11
re: Single Mothers...

single mothers have a difficult life as it is.they need as much support as possible.not all of them are chavs.as someone said above its difficult bringing up children with two parents,let alone one.

MsCurly Posted on 2/10 20:40
re: Single Mothers...

MickyMac......I don't believe that I'm 'always' being critical of my ex. If I do have the odd whinge about him though then perhaps (without the necessity to share personal information) it's justified?

Believe it or not, I fell in love with him, but that's not always enough to make a relationship work, especially when your priority is your kids.

Believe me.....despite my odd whine I'm probably the only thing that's keeping him from a bodybag right now. I might vent my spleen from time to time, but I'm the best friend he's ever had by a long chalk.

Nedkat Posted on 2/10 20:47
re: Single Mothers...

I'll admit to being extremely critical of my ex-wife. She turned into a horror movie after 5 years ! Spent more money than I earned, became a sad social climber, and ended up causing me some real grief. She's still doing it, her second husband just buggered off after almost exactly the same length of sentence I served. He also kicked her right up here arse, and broke her arm .. Which is not on at all !!! She pissed on my cornflakes big time, but I would never have hurt her physically, althought I do admit to praying for a large truck to run her over ...

Was that wrong ..?

rutters Posted on 2/10 21:03
re: Single Mothers...

whoops!!

--- Post edited by rutters on 2/10 21:05 ---

rutters Posted on 2/10 21:03
re: Single Mothers...

I believe that women have more rights (therefore more responsibilities) because;

A man has no rights over unborn children

Has little chance of gaining custody

Doesn't receive child benefit payments

happy_horse Posted on 2/10 21:06
re: Single Mothers...

Make a habbit out of what?

Nedkat Posted on 2/10 21:14
re: Single Mothers...

I didn't say habit ...

I said hobby, play on words type of thing ...

Smifter Posted on 2/10 21:17
re: Single Mothers...

Yes I understood why you were going to say it, but responsibility lies on both parties, its the courts and laws fault otherwise, in my opinion, in some cases partners should have to provide for pregnant partners.

George1507 Posted on 2/10 22:28
re: Single Mothers...

Mistakes happen to everyone.

However I think that if you are a single parent you should get benefit for only the first child, to stop more accidents.

CHEESE_PIES Posted on 2/10 22:40
re: Single Mothers...

Why should there be any benefits handed out at all.

If 'adults' want kids, they should 'finance' the situation them selves.

If can't afford it, then tough.

I'd like to holiday in Barbados every 2 months, but can't afford to.

it would certainly keep some girls on their feet, and not on their back

--- Post edited by CHEESE_PIES on 2/10 22:41 ---

Smifter Posted on 2/10 22:44
re: Single Mothers...

So cheese, if a mistake did happen, how would you expect this person to cope? Who would suffer the most? Would you want any child to suffer? I hope you dont have the misfortune of any of your family getting in a similar situation.

I think everyone would like a holiday in Barbados every 2 months, they arent exactly getting that sort of money, most are just getting the minimum which is enough to live on.





--- Post edited by Smifter on 2/10 22:44 ---

CHEESE_PIES Posted on 2/10 22:45
re: Single Mothers...

Aye, out of my hard earned wages

If they want help, they should be offered a loan.

All these 'situations' should be part of the school curriculum these days

--- Post edited by CHEESE_PIES on 2/10 22:47 ---

rutters Posted on 2/10 23:15
re: Single Mothers...

I agree with a number of points raised:

People who cannot afford to feed, house, clothe their children should be encouraged not to have children.

A loan system would prevent as many teenage pregnancies making it less of an 'ecomomic' decision to have a child.

Accidents can be cured by abortion. I do not agree that it is every woman's right to have a child when she is relying on other people to pay for it.

Smifter Posted on 2/10 23:36
re: Single Mothers...

Its their right not to feel like they have to have an abortion either.

I understand what you are saying if some mother is having numerous children and relying on the state. But cheese you cant honestly be saying that if a woman has found herself single after being pregnant they shouldnt be offered help? As I say hope none of your family or friends end up in this situation.

A loan system is not a bad idea however. Similar to a student loan system, once earning over a certain amount, maybe some of the money could be paid back? I am sure many women who found themselves accidentally in that position would have no problems with that.

boro365 Posted on 3/10 8:21
re: Single Mothers...

And what about single dads!, i bring my 2 kids up on my own, work full time, albeit self employed so i can work around them, the ex wife has a good job with good pay, does she help me, does she fook. Ive been waiting 2 yrs for the so called CSA to sort maintance out for me........ no wonder they are shutting it down, complete waste of time......... mind if the shoe was on the other foot the biatch would have stung me big style.

MsCurly Posted on 3/10 8:26
re: Single Mothers...

"Accidents can be cured by abortion." Possibly the single most revolting thing I've ever seen on here. What sort of a man ARE you? I feel sickened.

Boro365, good for you.....it's not an easy job and sometimes it's a thankless one, but you have more in your life than your ex ever will.

boro365 Posted on 3/10 8:32
re: Single Mothers...

Hey your right Mscurly, she missed out on the kids growing up, something i wouldnt swap for the world. True it is hard but we all get there in the end (smiley face thing)

rutters Posted on 3/10 10:04
re: Single Mothers...

"I feel sickened' ..how pretentious

whether you agree with abortion or not, it is an option women can take if they accidentally become pregnant, what's sickening about that? Thousands of women do it every day! (I may add without the acquiescence of the biological father)

zoec Posted on 3/10 10:06
re: Single Mothers...

rutters - you did make it sound like compulsory abortion.

rutters Posted on 3/10 10:14
re: Single Mothers...

really? then I apologise, that's not what I meant.

capio Posted on 3/10 10:14
re: Single Mothers...

The whole benefits system is a joke, it has become far too easy for the undeserving to take take take.

As I said earlier each case needs to be looked at individually there are people like MsCurlyís situation who deserve help that is the whole point of a social state. There will be people reading this now who are unemployed and have worked hard for years and due to unfortunate circumstances currently find themselves unemployed. They would like a job but are struggling to find one, they deserve our help and hopefully will find a job soon enough.

However in addition the country has a hell of a lot of people who are just lazy good for nothing scoundrels who deserve a rocket up the a55, they have no personal pride, no interest in working and are happy just to sponge from the rest of us, social clubs and bookmakers up and down the country are full of men like that.

There are a hell of a lot of single mothers who became pregnant on purpose to get an easy life, and those people sicken me.
Also those who are not careful enough deserve to pay something back for their mistake.

We have too easy an attitude to benefits, as though itís a right, it is not a right itís a privilege, if too many abuse that privilege this country will go bankrupt and that privilege will be withdrawn.

--- Post edited by capio on 3/10 10:15 ---

Smifter Posted on 3/10 10:17
re: Single Mothers...

"There are a hell of a lot of single mothers who became pregnant on purpose to get an easy life, and those people sicken me."

They dont sicken me, they have my full sympathy, if thats what they think will give them an easy life, what a mistake! A lot of these people have grown up thinking this is their right and what they are entitled to, due to their upbringing, a lot of people around them will be doing the same thing. They dont sicken me, I wish there was a better education system etc to show them what else is out there for them.

capio Posted on 3/10 10:21
re: Single Mothers...

So if somebody has been conditioned into a certain belief by those around them, that makes it OK?

In that case pa.edophiles don't sicken me I just wish they had been educated better.

Smifter Posted on 3/10 10:23
re: Single Mothers...

No it doesnt make it ok, it just doesnt sicken me. Or as I have already said above.

capio Posted on 3/10 10:25
re: Single Mothers...

I think youíre wasting your time here, you should go on a course to be a social worker and put a big arm around all those poor unfortunates in the world that made a mistake.

zoec Posted on 3/10 10:28
re: Single Mothers...

What, like working at the CAB? Why don't you give it a go, smifter

mickymac Posted on 3/10 10:30
re: Single Mothers...

Ok Curls,got any salacious details you can share?.

rutters Posted on 3/10 10:31
re: Single Mothers...

They don't 'sicken' me. It's the benefit system that's sickening. Any benefit that CAN be abused WILL be abused and IS being abused right now.

Young girls have an option that they see as the easy one and they take it. It's an option not available to young boys who either succeed, by getting a job OR fail!!

--- Post edited by rutters on 3/10 10:32 ---

Smifter Posted on 3/10 10:32
re: Single Mothers...

Don't want to be a social worker, I just think its disgusting how some people of society stereotype these girls. Lads can go off and do what they want but its always seen as the girls fault. Accidents do happen- but I dont think Capio you are referring to them-I hope not!

I think you were referring to the girls who either find themselves pregnant (and are happy even though they have little to offer financially) or have set out to become pregnant. I can fully understand what you mean. Some of these people have far more than me in terms of houses and benefits etc. Yes it gets on my nerves when I see them get free houses and im stuck at home, but those ones who did it deliberately probably had no idea how tough they were gonna be, bringing up children is no easy task especially on your own, and for that reason they have my sympathy rather than me be sickened by them.

capio Posted on 3/10 10:33
re: Single Mothers...

That evens itself out though rutters we can play football and don't have to suffer external bleeding once a month.

rutters Posted on 3/10 10:39
re: Single Mothers...

Is bringing up a child really more difficult than studying for, achieving and maintaining a full-time job? The girls I'm talking about obviously think not. After all some people bring up children AND work full-time so raising a child and not working must be easier than that, right?

capio Posted on 3/10 10:40
re: Single Mothers...

Theyíre costing our country money; sympathy shouldnít be awarded to them, shame perhaps and a feeling of wanting to put back what they took in the future.

mickbrown Posted on 3/10 10:43
re: Single Mothers...

"Is bringing up a child really more difficult than studying for, achieving and maintaining a full-time job?"

Er - yes. By a mile. Take it you've not got kids?

rutters Posted on 3/10 10:48
re: Single Mothers...

yes I have..why do you think it's so hard?

It's fun, satisfying, rewarding and you wouldn't exchange it for the anything. How many people say that about their jobs?

And if it were so bad why do so many people have more than one?

mickbrown Posted on 3/10 10:51
re: Single Mothers...

I'm saying its hard work, much harder than going to work.

capio Posted on 3/10 10:55
re: Single Mothers...

It is not work at all, it is simply a natural act that one shouldnít expect to be financially rewarded for.
Having children is a choice, if you think the Ďworkí outweighs the gains then donít have children.

mickbrown Posted on 3/10 10:57
re: Single Mothers...

capio - do you have kids?

Course its hard work.

rutters Posted on 3/10 11:00
re: Single Mothers...

I don't see it as hard work, there's no way you can say it's harder than working..you're doing it for love and because you want to NOT for money and an employer.

--- Post edited by rutters on 3/10 11:02 ---

susy Posted on 3/10 11:01
re: Single Mothers...

I work full time, have done part time university studies to enhance my career and am a single mother through no fault of my own, I was married well before conceiving my first. I find that it is true that being a parent is very rewarding and wonderful and everything else nice I can think of saying about it BUT may I say it is extremely hard work to do on your own. Mothers are usually the ones in a family who have to sort out the chuldcare, how often have you heard fathers say that they are babysitting tonight as their other half is going out? and how often have you heard a mother saying that????? If you havent heard a father saying that then its cos he is divorced or he has never let the mother of his kids go out with the girls! If You go out as a couple the mother is the one usually who organises the childcare arrangements etc etc etc. Mothers even if they are not single often have it hard, it isnt all wonderful and happy giggling children, its fighting with siblings being rude and pushing mum as far as they can often to breaking point.

There are a few girls who think it would be lovely to have a baby, and think its just like playing dolls in many ways however the truth is way off. This is where the education side comes in.

However the other view would obviously be that if a woman suddenly finds herself single and she is either pregnant or has children then they should be shot! That would save the country lots of tax payers money, maybe the Conservatives should put that in their manifesto im sure it would be popular.

mickbrown Posted on 3/10 11:01
re: Single Mothers...

I must have a cushy job then. I find it hard work

capio Posted on 3/10 11:01
re: Single Mothers...

It is the word work I object to as I equate the word work with ones means of livelihood.

The word work suggests people deserve to be financially rewarded for raising their own children.

That doesn't mean it is easy, but people do lots of things that are not easy that they don't get paid for, cutting their own grass, painting their own walls etc.

mickbrown Posted on 3/10 11:06
re: Single Mothers...

I never said it was a job. I said it was hard work. It is.

The_Commisar Posted on 3/10 11:11
re: Single Mothers...

Some interesting thoughts on this thread, and some widely different views.
Some parents have no choice about being in one parent families, a partner dies, a husband (or sometimes wife) decides to have no responsibility, the husband upsticks and flees the country, or the wife throws them out because they are abusive etc etc, but how do you tell the "deserving" cases from the "non deserving" cases ?

capio Posted on 3/10 11:17
re: Single Mothers...

Therein lies the problem commissar, there must be a set system and all systems are open to abuse.

Shaun71 Posted on 3/10 11:19
re: Single Mothers...

I was brought up from the age of 2 along with my sister by a single mother. I couldnt have wished for a better upbringing

rutters Posted on 3/10 11:19
re: Single Mothers...

@ susy
I'm afraid your looking at this from a subjective, female point of view.
I know just as many men who babysit as women.
I see men organising childcare
I see women not prepared to do 'Men's job'

each couple have different roles.

If you are suggesting that it's harder to be a mum than a dad then again that's looking from a purely female perspective.

No-one is saying anyone should be shot, simply asking why society should be asked to pay for the children of people who pay support them themselves.

Smifter Posted on 3/10 11:25
re: Single Mothers...

So rutters and capio. What do you propose a female does, when she finds out shes pregnant, and the male doesnt want to know? I have a feeling I know what rutters is gonna say, but I am interested in capio's thoughts.

rutters Posted on 3/10 11:42
re: Single Mothers...

Wander what you think I'd say? What are you trying to say?

anyway, in those circumstances I'd say she needs to consider if she still wants the baby or not. If she still wants it then she should be prepared to provde for it.

What about when a woman is going to abort a baby that the father wants to have? What about his rights?

mickbrown Posted on 3/10 11:45
re: Single Mothers...

And if she can't provide for it? Let 'em starve?

I can feel the love on this board, I really can.

zoec Posted on 3/10 11:46
re: Single Mothers...

rutters has a point about unmarried fathers' rights (and I do mean unmarried, living together doesn't mean a thing). No legal rights at all but has to pay for the upkeep of the child. I agree with the last part, but the first part needs to changed asap.

The_Commisar Posted on 3/10 11:47
re: Single Mothers...

It's like being trapped in the pages of the Daily Mail.....

mickbrown Posted on 3/10 11:48
re: Single Mothers...

zoec - what rights have married fathers got that unmarried ones haven't?

rutters Posted on 3/10 11:49
re: Single Mothers...

I'm not saying 'let it starve' but I am saying that their should be some onus for her to provide for her child, what's wrong with that?

That's my point. A system which allows people to rely on others to pay Will be and IS abused.

--- Post edited by rutters on 3/10 11:50 ---

zoec Posted on 3/10 11:53
re: Single Mothers...

mick - we have a little boy, but aren't married. If anything happens to me, as it stands at the moment, he becomes a ward of court, rather than custody automatically going to his father, which is just plain wrong. Things aren't so bad in our situation, as his father is on the birth certificate and he has his father's surname, which means that his dad does have some parental authority. If he wasn't on the birth certificate, he would have none whatsoever. No say in any part of the child's upbringing, but would be expected to support him. That is very unfair.

capio Posted on 3/10 11:54
re: Single Mothers...

Smifter life is all about making the right decision, when a woman decides to have a baby (this includes those who didnít take protection) they should be responsible for this act.

The woman is ultimately culpable for this decision because many men are assholes and will not think twice about running away from their responsibilitiesí.
The Ďcarrierí cannot do that.
When a lady chooses to become pregnant or fails to take adequate prevention we are morally embedded to finance their fuckup, I donít like it but thatís life. I do object to this being financed at the expense of those who are more deserving and believe that a pay back system should be introduced.

If the man does evoke himself of all responsibility then I suggest these women choose their partners better (this doesnít apply to long-term relationships that fail).

As in all large group dynamics some will always abuse the good will of others. Many single mothers do that, but it is certainly not a single mother issue, it is a cultural issue throughout the whole nation people are being brought up knowing nothing but being a lazy good for nothing unproductive piece of turd.

Try to add some sense to be confused answer, in short there is nothing we can do, other than make it harder for those who claim benefits.
I have been to countries where if you donít work you donít eat and I wouldnít want to see that, but there is a balance somewhere.

mickbrown Posted on 3/10 11:56
re: Single Mothers...

zoec - I thought that had recently changed.

mickbrown Posted on 3/10 11:58
re: Single Mothers...

capio - so if you suffer a tragic accident and become a paraplegic, you'd refuse all state help?

You're a better man than me.

Smifter Posted on 3/10 11:59
re: Single Mothers...

Why just the woman though Capio? So women should be responsible because men are assholes and women should expect it? *laughs out loud*

"If the man does evoke himself of all responsibility then I suggest these women choose their partners better"

How do you know how someone is gonna react before it happens? Some of the nicest lads turn into assholes in these situations, how would you be able to pick a better partner if you thought they were ok all along?

The_Commisar Posted on 3/10 12:03
re: Single Mothers...

I think what caps is saying that if a woman picks a right idiot that is abusive or ups and flees then our society is such that there should be some sort of support network, but it's not something he agrees with is that right Caps ?
Do you think the husband should be punished in such circumstances BTW ?

Good and healthy debate this.....

capio Posted on 3/10 12:19
re: Single Mothers...

Mick I didnít say that at all, actually quite the opposite if so many people were not taking when they could be giving we could support those who really need it a lot better than we do.
The issue that makes me more ashamed than any is the way we treat our elderly in this country it sickens me to the stomach.


Smifter if you fall pregnant to somebody you donít really know then youíre open to being left with a baby and no support network, it will be the naivety and stupidity of the woman that led to that situation.

I canít understand your attitude at all, basically youíre saying (and correct me if I am wrong) well OK if the guy is an asshole, its ok because we can all get benefits to cover up our bad choice of man.

As for picking the right partner, well make sure he is your long term partner, preferably your husband but at the very least somebody you believe will be your life partner.
Obviously many relationships end, thatís life, but if somebody falls pregnant to a guy who the have known for 3 months and is surprised when theyíre dumped, theyíre very naÔve.

capio Posted on 3/10 12:23
re: Single Mothers...

Commissar any man that walks out on his biological child and doesnít provide financial provisions should have his testicles removed as far as I am concerned.

That doesnít take away from the womanís responsibility to pick a good man to father their child, because men can always walk away, a woman canít walk away from something inside them.

It is a very easy cop out of a young woman to say oh well he was an asshole so now I need benefits for the next 10 years.

Why should I pay for their poor decision making?

mickbrown Posted on 3/10 12:24
re: Single Mothers...

Capio - "preferably your husband"

Why exactly?

Smifter Posted on 3/10 12:25
re: Single Mothers...

Not once I have said that at all. You said women should have ultimate responsibility because men are assholes and will run away with no responsbility, as if its ok for them to just do this, and because thats how it is, women should be prepared for that.

I am not talking about someone falling pregnant by someone you dont know, I am talking about someone falling pregant by someone they thought they knew well, and in fact didnt know them as well as they thought.

Surely most people have been in some sort of relationship in the past whether it was with a friend or partner where you thought someone was a really nice person yet for whatever reason you find out later they werent the person you thought.

Smifter Posted on 3/10 12:27
re: Single Mothers...

Capio- poor decision making? Some people use protection and accidents DO happen. Do you suggest no sex before marriage?

The_Commisar Posted on 3/10 12:27
re: Single Mothers...

Unfortunately lifes not that simple is it, how many people have set off thinking "this is it, this is the one" only to find people and circumstances change ?

"Why should I pay for their poor decision making?"

Social responsibility - we have a duty of care to those less lucky or fortunate (or as gifted ?) as others.

The victorians had a "why should I pay" attitude, they changed it as soon as the penny dropped that without a healthy and well fed proletariat, then their standards of life were at risk (example, changes in social provision following the Boer war).

good debate......

capio Posted on 3/10 12:34
re: Single Mothers...

Smifter its not that Ďmení will walk away on their responsibilitiesí it is that some men will. Therefore nature and animal instincts should kick in and a woman should choose the partner that will protect and care for their young.

I certainly never said that is OK you made that up so I wont waste time giving that a full response.

As for a partner they know, well here is the balance; if the couple has been in a long term relationship say 3 or 4 years and then the man walks out I have a lot of sympathy for the young lady, however I believe that in the majority of these cases the man will offer financial support.
My concern is a naÔve young lady falling pregnant to a young chap she has known for 8 weeks and saying well I thought he was nice, but he dumped me because he is an asshole and I wasnít intelligent enough to take protection.

This is not a 50-50 situation as somebody said above, women get most of the rights and with rights comes responsibility.

It is your body, you will carry the child, moaning afterwards that some nobrash is just as responsible as you isnít going to help you at 2am when your child needs nappies you canít afford.

Chutney Posted on 3/10 12:51
re: Single Mothers...

Can't be bothered to wade through all of this, but here's my simple view from a position of being 15 months into parenthood.

Having a kid is a massive shock to the system and looking after them properly is incredibly hard work. Yes, it's rewarding, no, I wouldn't back out of going down this route in hindsight for one second, but don't imagine for a second that it is anything but really, really hard work.

And speaking as someone who is sharing the load with my partner, the thought of having to do this all day every day on my own is impossible to comprehend. Hats off to single mothers for even trying, and anyone who reckons it's just an easy scam for a quick benefits buck is really a little bit of a cretin.

capio Posted on 3/10 12:55
re: Single Mothers...

Chutney there is absolutely no doubt that some young girls get pregnant in order to get a free house and benefits, so despite the brash nature of your post it carries little weight.

mickbrown Posted on 3/10 13:00
re: Single Mothers...

But why does that worry you so much? They get a shytty flat in a shytty area and a few quid each week.

I'm more likely to lose sleep over the fact that Philip Green doesn't pay any income tax.

rutters Posted on 3/10 13:14
re: Single Mothers...

I agree with capio, in certain areas it's now a generational thing. Girls get pregnant to get a house near their mum. The council acts as husband and provider and the mother acts as babysitter on an evening. When the female child grows up she sees this to be the norm.

I also see the knock-on effects of young boys who's mum has lost control of. I know it's not only children of single mothers but where I work (council estate, east M'bro)it seems to be prevalent.

Oh yes, I want Phillip Green to pay more tax as well.

--- Post edited by rutters on 3/10 13:15 ---

Chutney Posted on 3/10 13:16
re: Single Mothers...

Well if that's the case, capio, they'll get a bloody shock. So either way, they're not getting one over on you, which appears to be your main concern.

Like I said, can't be chewed reading the whole thread, but in case I missed it, have you got kids?

happy_horse Posted on 3/10 14:47
re: Single Mothers...

Does a child need two parents to be raised properly? or is one parent enough

grantus Posted on 3/10 16:08
re: Single Mothers...

If stupid young slappers could keep their legs closed for 5 minutes, there would be a lot less single mothers in this country.

happy_horse Posted on 3/10 16:12
re: Single Mothers...

What a stupid thing to say

Capybara Posted on 3/10 16:16
re: Single Mothers...

Oops, missed that.

'Textbook'

grantus Posted on 3/10 16:17
re: Single Mothers...

Why is that?

happy_horse Posted on 3/10 16:18
re: Single Mothers...

It takes two to tango

grantus Posted on 3/10 16:25
re: Single Mothers...

But a woman HAS to take more responsibilty as it is she who ultimately gets to make the decision to keep or to abort an unwanted or unplanned pregnancy.

Yes, a man can use a condom, but I'd be interested to know just how many actually do.

A woman can use a plethora of different types of birth control.

There are too many young slappers about though who choose not to.

If these girls are not in a stable relationship and cannot provide for a child themself, their pregnancy should be aborted.

susy Posted on 3/10 16:27
re: Single Mothers...

I think the people on here who are generally objecting to single mothers are objecting to people who choose to have children either cos they are to nieve or stupid to use precautions or those who expect to live off the state.... in other words people who are not in fact responsible for their own actions.

To try and put a balanced view point over I wouls like to make 2 points. the first is I agree with the point that people who have children should be able to provide for them themselves this includes families with 2 parents/single mums/homosexuals (female or male)/anything else. This is how it should start and if there were no benefits ie going up the list to get a council house or having 20 children to get a bigger council house and even more benefits.

The second point is that many single mothers and fathers find themselves in this position through no fault of there own ie marriage breakdown or death or anything else i havnt though of and may not have enough income to keep there children fed clothed or have to give up working full time to take on part time work because their children have been traumatised in some way and need them. all sorts of reasons.

There are rules and even if we dont agree with them ultimatly if we dont help families that need it because we want to punish greedy scroungers, the children are the ones who suffer.

There endeth the lesson xx

Smifter Posted on 3/10 16:28
re: Single Mothers...

Grantus please tell me you are on the wind up, please!

SouthernSmogette Posted on 3/10 16:28
re: Single Mothers...

Grantus.....I'm sincerely shocked. This doesn't happen very often.

capio Posted on 3/10 16:32
re: Single Mothers...

Would you have been shocked had I said it ss?

grantus Posted on 3/10 16:35
re: Single Mothers...

The estates of Manchester, London, Middlesbrough, Sheffield, Newcastle, Sunderland, Leeds, etc. are full of teenage girls with children. We have the highest levels of teenage pregnancy in Europe. Something needs to be done, it's a disgrace!

I'm sick of this bloody scrounging culture that we have. Sick of it. There is a family, neighbours of mine, they dont work, either of them and they have about 6 children. It makes my blood boil. Something needs to be done, it's a disgrace!

What would you have us do? Actively encourage it?

grantus Posted on 3/10 16:36
re: Single Mothers...

I appreciate that my comments are extreme and I wasn't being completely serious, but I'm not happy about it.

mickbrown Posted on 3/10 16:37
re: Single Mothers...

Anybody who lives on a council estate - chops their knobs off. That'll teach em, eh Grantus?

The_Commisar Posted on 3/10 16:39
re: Single Mothers...

Perhaps, and this is a wild one, rather than the attitude "sex is bad thou shalt not even know about it" Victorian Dad attitude from Viz, how about, education ?

Yes radical I know, accepting that people will have sex.

SouthernSmogette Posted on 3/10 16:40
re: Single Mothers...

In answer to Grantus.....
Yes I would actively encourage it. Currently I am working on a marketing plan to double the figures of teen mothers in our great and fantastic and amazing country. I've issued the strap line.....Keep Great Britain Growing....

In answer to Capio
No.....no nor if that other extremist KENDAL had said it either.

susy Posted on 3/10 16:43
re: Single Mothers...

I object to working full time whilst other families have 2 healthy parents who dont work and have several kids and dont lift a finger to try and pay for themselves. these people need to be made to work for their living even if its just for the government cleaning the million gobbs of chewing gum off the streets!

grantus Posted on 3/10 16:45
re: Single Mothers...

You might be on to something there actually Smogette. The more little chavs born, the more we can recruit for my new venture. A venture born out of the ban on Fox hunting.

Chav hunting - perfect for stag doos, corporate events and team building, reunions and family gatherings.

We arm you all with either shotguns or rifles and you can choose to ride or walk through the forest. We release young chavs into the forest and, in teams you compete for the most kills.

A perfect weekend for civilised folk, for gentry and those with an appreciation for the finer things in life.

You think it could work?

Nedkat Posted on 3/10 16:45
re: Single Mothers...

Grantus points to a definite problem, he doesn't say what solutions may be available. The teenage pregnacy rate is a issue that needs to be addressed sooner rather than later. There are methods that allow people to have sex, to enjoy sex, but to stop the young girls getting pregnant. What happended to sex education, and free condoms ? Young people seem more promiscuous these days, and I thought the threat of STD's or even AIDS would have knocked that on the head.
The other issue is the drain on the social services, it must cost a fortune. Then there's the underlying reasons for this type of thing happening, is it the current education levels ? Is it the lack of government intervention, or the way standards have been allowed to plummet in the last 20 years ?

grantus Posted on 3/10 16:52
re: Single Mothers...

I would imagine that the education system needs to be reviewed on a constant basis. It should not only be reviewed by the governemnt but also groups whose lives are closer to the target audience.

I'd suggest college students, university students, teacher training courses, parents of playschool groups, as well as other places.

I'd also give the pill for free at schools, the morning aftewr pill at schools as well as condoms.

This will not stop all kids or educate all kids, but one would hope it would reduce teenage pregnacies.

Would it though?

As long as the government rewards people for having children, houses people for having children, gives more benefits for having children, then we will always have losers having kids that they shouldn't be having.

You should provide for your children to the very best of your ability. Otherwise tough, no handouts for you.

The_Commisar Posted on 3/10 17:02
re: Single Mothers...

Grantus
thing is, on this area of social policy you get stuck between a number of issues, the Daily Mail readers say they should be hung and flogged, whilst wittering that there are no young people to pay their pensions, the Guardianistas say they are poor misunderstood kids whilst bemoaning the fact someone has vommed down the side of their 2CV.
They all want something to be done, but no one can or will.

If you want the government to do something, anything, it's got to be worth it politicly, and there is no social policy consensus, therefore as many votes as can be won can be lost.

susy Posted on 3/10 17:03
re: Single Mothers...

Grantus.... I strangely find myself agreeing with you, now im really worried.

SouthernSmogette Posted on 3/10 17:04
re: Single Mothers...

It's all down to choice......

I refuse to comment further on this topic.

grantus Posted on 3/10 17:07
re: Single Mothers...

I know Commy, but this is only one of those issues that is rolled out to hide something else, it is not really taken seriously enough.

When was it last on the front pages?

Why not at the very least do what I suggested education wise on a yearly basis?

The abortion thing would never work in practics I realise that.

How about everyone gets snipped at birth and has to apply for a parent licence, once granted, the snip is reversed?

The_Commisar Posted on 3/10 17:13
re: Single Mothers...

To get on the front page it has to fight it's way past
"all immigrants are scum coming to defile your daughters and shaft your king charles spaniel" (The Daily Mail)
or
"We demand world peace now and just really don't know what you lot are playing at, we're going to have a group hug about it" (Guardian)
"Jade Goody has her tits blown off by a man with a waterpistol - exclusive pics" (Heat)

No responsible adult wants to bring a child up on their own, and I hope society has the compassion to help those who are incapable of doing so with out support.

York_Smoggie Posted on 3/10 17:14
re: Single Mothers...

My mam was a great single mother. Mind you she was single cos me dad had died.....he was 70 and she 64 by the way. As i was 30 at the time I don't believe she recieved any benefits though.

Smifter Posted on 3/10 17:30
re: Single Mothers...

What about the ones who arent chavs grant? or are all girls who find themselves in this situation a chav?

grantus Posted on 3/10 17:33
re: Single Mothers...

Look, something needs to be done to lower the levels of teenage pregnancy in this country. Don't you agree?

Smifter Posted on 3/10 17:35
re: Single Mothers...

Yes but that isnt what I asked. You are making out like all people who get into this situation are chavs and that is just not the case.

grantus Posted on 3/10 17:39
re: Single Mothers...

My Smifter, you really can be sensitive sometimes, can't you? Calm down mate.

The majority of people are one or more of the following. Uneducated, chav, jobless, immegrants, council dwellings, etc.

That obviously does not mean that they all are, but it is in this majority group that the attention is needed the most.

I'm all for a solution that helps and supports people but does not financially reward and provide for folk.

Smifter Posted on 3/10 17:42
re: Single Mothers...

Yes I can be sensitive, one of my best friends is in the this very situation and is due to give birth alone any day now, she is a lovely lovely girl, and has found herself in terrible circumstances. I just cant believe reading this thread some would have made her have an abortion/not give her help (delete as applicable). I am sure in the future she will more than give back in society what she has taken.

grantus Posted on 3/10 17:44
re: Single Mothers...

Smifter, you are developing a habit of misunderstanding my postings on here lately.

grantus Posted on 3/10 17:45
re: Single Mothers...

But that's ok, I still think you're lovely.

Smifter Posted on 3/10 17:46
re: Single Mothers...

Yes and you have a habit of thinking that I am speaking directly to you, and as you will see I havent I am referring to a number of posts from different people.

Smifter Posted on 3/10 17:57
re: Single Mothers...

You have just about saved your sponsor money there

grantus Posted on 3/10 17:59
re: Single Mothers...

Oh, I'd forgotten all about that.

Don't always take what I say as being my opinion, I like to simply encourage debate sometimes.

Smifter Posted on 3/10 18:05
re: Single Mothers...

"If stupid young slappers could keep their legs closed for 5 minutes, there would be a lot less single mothers in this country"

Encouraging debate I hope? deary me

grantus Posted on 3/10 18:07
re: Single Mothers...

A bit of mischievious playful banter aimed at reviving a thread.

Coluka Posted on 3/10 18:12
re: Single Mothers...

They're doing BUY ONE GET ONE FREE down at Surestart

capio Posted on 3/10 18:12
re: Single Mothers...

Smifter you have to learn to be objective rather that always back a situation because you or a friend fit into the topic,
It was apparent all along that either a friend of family member fit the criteria and you felt the need to vilify her situation, very similar to another discussion recently about unemployment

Smifter Posted on 3/10 18:14
re: Single Mothers...

I am objective, however we all experience personal things that make us see things in a slightly differently way to what we did before, which are going to affect our opinions and judgements.

I thought this before, my friend going through it, only confirms what I already thought.

--- Post edited by Smifter on 3/10 18:16 ---

capio Posted on 3/10 18:17
re: Single Mothers...

It was rather subjective to fall back onto your friend to make a point.

Smifter Posted on 3/10 18:19
re: Single Mothers...

Yes but everyone can be objective and make a subjective example to get their point across, there is many girls like my friend, I was explaining her situation to make people understand what I meant about unchav like people getting themselves into this situation.

capio Posted on 3/10 18:22
re: Single Mothers...

Well I still donít really understand what a chav is, but any young woman that is not planning a child and is not taking protections is very stupid indeed.

Smifter Posted on 3/10 18:23
re: Single Mothers...

Ever heard of protection failing?

capio Posted on 3/10 18:25
re: Single Mothers...

I have, does it apply in this case?

capio Posted on 3/10 18:26
re: Single Mothers...

How effective is the Pill?

Itís very effective indeed ó which is why so many millions of women rely on it. If you take it exactly as prescribed, then its effectiveness is likely to be 100 per cent.

Put it another way: letís say that 100 women use the Pill for a year, and that all of them never forget to take the little tablet. It is likely that not a single one of them will get pregnant.

In contrast, if they were all relying on the condom instead, then probably about five of them would become pregnant. And if they used no contraception at all, then at least 20 of them would fall pregnant!

So the Pill is just about the most effective method of contraception there is, apart from sterilisation .

chboro Posted on 3/10 18:29
re: Single Mothers...

Capio - our lass was on the pill and fell pregnant with our first - the only way to guarantee 100% not to fall pregnant is to swallow it

capio Posted on 3/10 18:34
re: Single Mothers...

well at least she had you to pay for her and not me amd my fellow tax payers.

happy_horse Posted on 3/10 21:32
re: Single Mothers...

There are some very small minded people on here

Nedkat Posted on 3/10 21:45
re: Single Mothers...

I knew this would happen !!!

OK, what's the weight of your mind ? I've got a huge mind, but most of it thinks about sex ...

ThePrisoner Posted on 3/10 21:49
re: Single Mothers...

What's the problem here. Surely regular prostitution is more than adequate to pay for the child plus the mother's crack addiction?

rioside Posted on 3/10 22:25
re: Single Mothers...

Milfs