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Lisbonlegend Posted on 09/07/2008 13:52
FMTTM Posters

Can we do a collective blurb on ever single poster on FMTTM.

I'll start.

Pauluka - Former SAS man now looks more like Seth from Emmerdale with Racing Post under 1 arm and pipe in mouth. Been on here with his tips since 2004.

captain5 Posted on 09/07/2008 13:53
FMTTM Posters

Seth's dead.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 09/07/2008 13:55
FMTTM Posters

When did he first post, captain?

Lisbonlegend Posted on 09/07/2008 14:00
FMTTM Posters

PinkPonce - Originally posted using the ridiculously long and bland redandwhitearmy1986. After being ignored for a couple of years he decided to use the guise of a pansy potter in order to generate homophobic hatred responses. This worked a treat for a while but the one trick pony ended up riding Lisbon's coat tails and stealing his thread ideas in order to stay in the public eye.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 09/07/2008 14:07
FMTTM Posters

Captain5 - After starring as R2D2 in the original Star Wars film, the patronising dwarf made his name in FMTTM history as most confusing poster. The inability for anyone to guess his age, which could be anything from 13 to 52, has been a feature of his tenure. He's been likened to the Rumpelstilitskin of age concern. Not known for his basketball skills, the lovable munchkin can make a mean Wonka bar.

ridsdale Posted on 09/07/2008 14:09
FMTTM Posters

Do one for Marlon Lisbon.

PinkPonce Posted on 09/07/2008 14:09
FMTTM Posters

On your own on your own on your own.

PS: I was still known as the pinkponce for about 2 years when I was around as R&WA1986.

Pauluka Posted on 09/07/2008 14:10
FMTTM Posters

"After starring as R2D2 in the original Star Wars film" [:D]

Pauluka Posted on 09/07/2008 14:11
FMTTM Posters

Oh look Ponce arrived to spoil it

boro_bIiss Posted on 09/07/2008 14:11
FMTTM Posters

Trodbitch started stalking me for 3 years ago now and wanted to bring violence on my face. I am in England and will look him in the eye soon.

PinkPonce Posted on 09/07/2008 14:12
FMTTM Posters

[:D]

Credit where credit is due....

"Captain5 - After starring as R2D2 in the original Star Wars film, the patronising dwarf made his name in FMTTM history as most confusing poster. The inability for anyone to guess his age, which could be anything from 13 to 52, has been a feature of his tenure. He's been likened to the Rumpelstilitskin of age concern. Not known for his basketball skills, the lovable munchkin can make a mean Wonka bar."

[:D]

The_same_as_before Posted on 09/07/2008 14:13
FMTTM Posters

Mix of tenses there, ask Capy to read future drafts.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 09/07/2008 14:16
FMTTM Posters

MarlonD - The gangly bucktoothed Plug lookalike has graced the board for several years with his acidic monosylaballic put downs. Unfortunately the ungainly timber merchant has failed to evolve and still uses the same 'plasterers radio' joke at every opportunity. Given the runaround by Ridsdale recently he seems to have taken a back seat, along with Critical_Bill who is probably sucking on his Hemlington plums.

Pauluka Posted on 09/07/2008 14:19
FMTTM Posters

[:D]

Grantus next

Lisbonlegend Posted on 09/07/2008 14:20
FMTTM Posters

Jesus, it's not like I haven't got any work to do. This was supposed to be a free for all FFS.[:o)]

Henry_Blofeld Posted on 09/07/2008 14:20
FMTTM Posters

"Trodbitch started stalking me for 3 years ago now and wanted to bring violence on my face. I am in England and will look him in the eye soon."

LOL Is this the real Bliss? Trod better watch out!

ridsdale Posted on 09/07/2008 14:20
FMTTM Posters

Spot on that one on Marlon Lisbon.


You are a clever man.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 09/07/2008 14:22
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Thankyou Ridders.

Henry_Blofeld Posted on 09/07/2008 14:25
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Rob_Fmttm easily recognisable thanks to his matching rosy cheeks and red nose. Rob’s past times include wearing anoraks, banning people who insult his friends whilst condoning the multiple username abuse by his friends and singing in a god awful band. T t tooooooddddaaaa man.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 09/07/2008 14:26
FMTTM Posters

Borobliss - The Spanish SC***horpe German born beauty made her name posting horrorscopes in the early 1900's. Since then and after after luring the previous board moderator into her love dungeon with her sweet tongue, she is back and ready & willing to snare another unsuspecting board member. Favourites to fall victim to her charms are young (or maybe old) captain5 and mailinator.

Henry_Blofeld Posted on 09/07/2008 14:27
FMTTM Posters

LittleJimmy :- a sensitive misfit who argues with people who are far less civilised than himself leading to occasional emotional outbursts. Condemns money chasing right wingers who mock other races whilst travelling half way across the world to earn a crust and insulting Arabs along the way.

Jimmy’s pastimes include fox hunting and hating the English.

bernieisgod Posted on 09/07/2008 14:28
FMTTM Posters

I promised myself I wouldn't be a pedant but....

"past times include wearing anoraks, banning people who insult his friends whilst condoning the multiple username abuse by his friends and singing in a god awful band. "

I think maybe pastimes?

Henry_Blofeld Posted on 09/07/2008 14:28
FMTTM Posters

Red_Rebel has given up on using his outdated doctrine to influence Teesside’s youth and instead concentrates on using multiple usernames to instigate trouble. Has lost a lot of his bite since his less intelligent but more belligerent wing man defected to Block17.

Henry_Blofeld Posted on 09/07/2008 14:30
FMTTM Posters

Gillandi :- likes to post under new usernames these days and rarely makes an appearance as a stand alone artist. Once a Fmttm stalwart, a true warrior whose drunken behaviour includes calling other posters and performing songs about them. His desire for another poster to commit suicide was overlooked due to his grand pappa bear clique status.

Henry_Blofeld Posted on 09/07/2008 14:32
FMTTM Posters

Capybara is the world’s oldest man at 186 , capybara enjoys talking about trains and needs regular medical checkups due to the heart palpitations he suffers whenever a poster puts a full stop in the wrong place.

PinkPonce Posted on 09/07/2008 14:33
FMTTM Posters

Critical Bill. Hemlington lad stuck in a rut and in a job he despises. Has yet to find true love and spends his days insulting others with predictable, over used lines. About as repetitive as an Ariston advert, Bill, more recently, was the founder member of FMTTM’s “Backstreet Boys” along with Lead vocalist Marlon D, Bassist, The Throcking Man, and Kevin Bacon Butties on the Triangle.

Henry_Blofeld Posted on 09/07/2008 14:33
FMTTM Posters

Uncle Harry, the self-appointed thinking man of the board... Harry enjoys pun fests and talking to his friend Bob Fischer on the radio about how he is too scared to buy Filet-o-Fish in the store due to his concerns over his mispronunciation. I am sure the check out girls in Aldi are most please for your consideration Harry.

Henry_Blofeld Posted on 09/07/2008 14:34
FMTTM Posters

Bernieisgod - erm nobody knows nor cares.

PinkPonce Posted on 09/07/2008 14:38
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ExSqueezeMe: Creatid bye Flar (C Mufflar, Ako_Killa ) and off ten yousd in a a tempt to at track attention when more popula posters like the PinkPonce r steeling the lime light!!! LMAO LOL PMSL

Pauluka Posted on 09/07/2008 14:39
FMTTM Posters

Ako_Killa wasn't flar

But carry on

Lisbonlegend Posted on 09/07/2008 14:48
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neilg - The marginally psychotic 'ex army' and 'join the dots' expert has been linked to having a romantic interest in boro_bliss. The board obviously sees this as the wedding of the year if it were to come off and more excitedly look forward to the birth of their slightly 'off the cuff' and 'haphazard' children. In the meantime, neil will continue to fly the flag for the British Army and not at all remind people of the film 'Jacob's Ladder'.

flar Posted on 09/07/2008 14:48
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thank you paul

bernieisgod Posted on 09/07/2008 14:52
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"Bernieisgod - erm nobody knows nor cares."

harsh Henry - me mam knows and cares!

p.s. I was apologetically pedantic too!

neilg Posted on 09/07/2008 14:52
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im flattered to be graced by your presence.wots this about boro-bliss? who is.....? do tell.x

captain5 Posted on 09/07/2008 14:52
FMTTM Posters

mailinator - well known bitchslapper, is looking forward to meeting boro_bliss, but rather than make eye contact will probably just stare at her large breasts.

flar Posted on 09/07/2008 14:55
FMTTM Posters

Nedkat - Board elder statesman, exiled in the US after receiving too much male attention in the Navy. Generally a Steady Eddie but lets himself down occasionally with sudden rants about his ex-wife and random, slighthly embarassing threats of violence towards younger board members.

see below vvv

NedKat Posted on 09/07/2008 14:56
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It's NEDKAT, you moron !!!!


I'll knock yer teeth down yer throat !!!!

Pauluka Posted on 09/07/2008 14:57
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Captain5 would also like to stare at them as he would be at the same height

captain5 Posted on 09/07/2008 14:58
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Don't be silly. I'd use them as ear warmers.

bernieisgod Posted on 09/07/2008 14:59
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"see below vvv"

I think NEDKAT might have meant that tongue-in-cheek Flar!

flar Posted on 09/07/2008 15:00
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WHOOOSH!

NedKat Posted on 09/07/2008 15:00
FMTTM Posters

Too late Bernie, I can hear the sound of a WHOOOSH slowly fading away ...

NedKat Posted on 09/07/2008 15:01
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Make a wish, Flar !

bernieisgod Posted on 09/07/2008 15:02
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DAMN!!!

MarlonD Posted on 09/07/2008 15:06
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Lisbon - I resemble those comments

SuperBokSupper Posted on 09/07/2008 15:09
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Mat_Evans

Gammy legged Moe Syzlak lookalike, Mat has been out of sorts recently due to his fannying about after breaking his leg NEARLY TWO YEARS AGO. Attempts at finding a sport he is any good at has backfired and he has resorted to playing off the ladies tees at Golf. Is completely unaware his mates only put up with him for the chance to catch glimpses of his fit sister. Also suffers Ponce like delusions about his fashion sense, once sporting a t shirt with a glamour model with blood spurting from her nose.

MarlonD Posted on 09/07/2008 15:11
FMTTM Posters

ridsdale - a bit of a loner who befriends other posters who have alienated themselves from modern society (pp, Drago etc). He likes to work alone most of the time but every now & again teams up with one of the afore mentioned to give the boards equivalent to Rosemary & Thyme.

grantus Posted on 09/07/2008 15:18
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Hehee

Paul, look at you stirring. [:)]

MarlonD Posted on 09/07/2008 15:20
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Lisbon - A child trapped in a panda's body. He has a well documented battle with his addiction to pastry products. He holds the world record for the number of neighbours to have had untimely deaths and also represented GBR at the alternative sport of power jacket wearing*


*this involves wearing the same outfit continously for 2 years minimum

The_same_as_before Posted on 09/07/2008 15:22
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Liddle Towers - known for his Scarlet Pimpernel impresssions when the going gets tough.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 09/07/2008 16:56
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Yo do indeed resemble those comments, Marlon.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 09:47
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BoroMart - The board stalwart resembles a large balloon in more ways than one. His ability to spout hot air and his immensely sized cranium make this experienced waffler a board favourite. The ability to dredge up stats on England Under-21 internationals over the last 20 years keeps the board members on the edge of their pillows. Had a brief fling with grantus but that appears to have cooled recently due to the long distance. Has recently put his feelers out for bobstermarley.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 09:54
FMTTM Posters

flar - The serial name changer and 'get rich quick' schemer appears to have lost his mind recently. Spending the days on the board answering his own questions on dips, shares and over 1.76 corners in the Ghana v Papa New Guinea match using different usernames. After confessing to spending the mornings feeling the warmth of his own tail, his lothario rating has been the equivalent of a stock market crash recently. Wants a bit of zoec but she's too wise too fall for the investment banker wannabe.

flar Posted on 10/07/2008 09:57
FMTTM Posters

"Wants a bit of zoec"

How utterly vulgar!

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 09:58
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boroandproud - The boards resident bisexual mekon briefly hit stardom with his outrageous comments and frantic handwaving when excited. The novelty of being the only gay mekon in the village soon wore off when bobstermarley returned to fight the pink corner. Not been seen since grantus locked him in his fluffy dungeon after BoroMart escaped.

hewielewie Posted on 10/07/2008 09:58
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"Wants a bit of zoec"

Which bit?

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 10:00
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Her mind, obviously.

hewielewie Posted on 10/07/2008 10:03
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Will she mind him wanting her mind or keep him in mind?

MarlonD Posted on 10/07/2008 10:07
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Henry_Blofeld - the manhead formerly known as Drago is a complex character. He once had an eventful 2 week holiday in Croatia where he married into their royal family, became a property magnate, owned a car sales showroom & became a major European soccer agent. This has had a detrimental effect on him and he now spends his day secured in the back bedroom of his parents house on Valley Road , where he rocks back & forth in his chair dressed in his favourite SuperTed pyjamas.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 10:10
FMTTM Posters

Erm, not sure what you just said.

hewielewie Posted on 10/07/2008 10:11
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Actually neither am I [:)]

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 10:16
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hewielewie - The board's equivalent of the riddler in bespoke green question mark patterened outfit. The Disney duck sounding poster is also the Barry Norman of the board. Being quick witted he only tends watch the endings of films to save time as the start and middle sections just get in the way of a good old ending. Also only reads the last page of books and has already finished over 4,500 novels.

Boromart Posted on 10/07/2008 10:44
FMTTM Posters

harsh but fair I suppose lisbon. Keep em coming, what about onthemap and Sas?

captain5 Posted on 10/07/2008 10:45
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I've tried to do theirs but get half way through and feel really sleepy or suicidal.

hewielewie Posted on 10/07/2008 10:46
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I reckon if On The Map was a cartoon character he would be Eeyore

Bandy Posted on 10/07/2008 10:47
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do me do me do me...not literally

number9 Posted on 10/07/2008 10:49
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Number9 - The self absored one

Boromart Posted on 10/07/2008 10:53
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hewielewie [:)] - you have caught the essance of OTM perfectly.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 11:02
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Onthemap - The boards serial misery. Years of having to live in a household with 15 whingeing kids have taken it's toll on the overseas property developer. His nickname back at home is 'I told you so' as his kids walk about with their Rochemback and Cattermole replica shirts whilst their dad wags his finger at them. Needs a spell at the sunshine clinic for depressive halfwits.

Lefty Posted on 10/07/2008 11:22
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[:D] I nearly missed this thread.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 11:25
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Bandy - The board's very own jack in a box. Just when you think he's retired he'll suddenly appear out the blue. Uncannily resembles the charicature which he drew of himself, tiny body and oversized head included. Prefers pizzas to suckling on women's breasts but has a place in the FMTTM hall of fame due to his ability to evolve and outlast the likes of red_rebel and Capybara. Hangs around with famous mates like Morrisey and his work for the local media has seen him appear in the Herald & Post on at least 3 occassions.

Bandy Posted on 10/07/2008 11:31
FMTTM Posters

Very good!

:)

ridsdale Posted on 10/07/2008 11:34
FMTTM Posters

LisbonLegend, Popular, prolific poster. Manages to combine his career as an energy engineer alongside his homely writings on life in London. Brightens up the dullest of days.

Does an immense amount of work for a variety of charities. I cannot say which charities they are as he seldom mentions this part of his life.

ridsdale Posted on 10/07/2008 11:40
FMTTM Posters

MarlonD, spends most of his time in the bait cabin of the timber yard he works in. Listens to 'the lads' picking up bits of banter which he scribbles down on blank dispatch notes on his clipboard for later use on here.

bernieisgod Posted on 10/07/2008 11:42
FMTTM Posters

I've always seen MarlonD as trying (and failing) to cope with severe rejection in his life - probably got thrown out of cubs or summat - likes to remove any positivity he comes across!

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 11:49
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bernieisgod - A late comer to the board but has now settled in with his pipe and slippers. He's the board's equivalent to Stephen Hawkings, talks a load of shyte that noone can understand but people still read it. He might have a wheelchair and dribble out the side of his mouth aswell but that's not yet been confirmed. The boards professor has now mastered the CAPS LOCK button and will attempt to tackle the spell checker as his next big project.

MarlonD Posted on 10/07/2008 11:49
FMTTM Posters

You're both so close I think you actually know me.


grantus Posted on 10/07/2008 11:49
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"Does an immense amount of work for a variety of charities. I cannot say which charities they are as he seldom mentions this part of his life."

[:D]

Proper chuckle.

bernieisgod Posted on 10/07/2008 11:50
FMTTM Posters

Lisbon [:D] - I can see the foundations of your thoughts - though I would like to point out that I have pretty much controlled the dribbling now! - no chance with spill chacker though!

Dr_Evil Posted on 10/07/2008 11:52
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Ridsdale, you surprise me with your wit!

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 11:58
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HolgateOldSkool - Despite his long term presence on the board and his continuing mission to make football sound much duller than it actually is, he remains surprisingly low key. Even sharing a caravan of love with BoroMart and grantus wasn't enough to propel the wily old miser into the limelight. Would be number one choice to play Casper the friendly ghost in a board remake.

Libbins Posted on 10/07/2008 12:01
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[:D]

ridsdale Posted on 10/07/2008 12:03
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Red_Rebel, former 70's revolutionary trapped in the body and clothes of Micheal Foot. Relives the days of numerous Troskyist factions by visiting this messageboard and analysing the various cults on here.

Close to retiring from his middleclass job as a lecturer, he is topping up his index linked pension to celebrate the passing of Margaret Thatcher.

SuperBokSupper Posted on 10/07/2008 12:07
FMTTM Posters

Alves -

Possibly the best footballer in the world, equally at home in defence or attack and his constant encouragement spurs his team mates on no end.
Recent revelations that Alves and his gang of youths would repeatedly surround and beat up a certain Capio/Lord David/Tony Drago will no doubt enamour him to the higher echelons of board society.

Parmoman17 Posted on 10/07/2008 12:07
FMTTM Posters


Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 12:07
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Dr Evil - One of the unsung Southern Boro supporting heroes of the board. It is rumoured that his abilty to weave lie after lie is almost of professional status, unless of course he is actually trapped in a reverse dimension where bodybuilding and exercise actually make you chubby and unfit. Once famously had a threesome for a 'short period' before his missus took offence to him straddling her 'bucktoothed' friend first and locked herself in the bathroom. Just left a main role in Hollyoaks as the annoying homosexual 'I'm living a lie' vicar type person.

grantus Posted on 10/07/2008 12:09
FMTTM Posters

When was this love triangle with Boromart and HolgateOldSkool that I'm accused of?

I must have been asleep.

Dr_Evil Posted on 10/07/2008 12:10
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[:D]

red_rebel Posted on 10/07/2008 12:14
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[:)]

ridsdale Posted on 10/07/2008 12:20
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Fischer, despite consuming less of our license fee that the water dispenser in Broadcasting House, Fisch produces and presents a cult comedy show on BBC Radio Tees. When pensioners learn how to retune their radios, this will become an even rarer cult 'hidden gem'.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 12:28
FMTTM Posters

grantus - Although largely ignored recently, the portly poster could become a cult figure as the recession hits hard due to his knowledge of arable land and self sufficiency. The chubby Bill Maynard lookalike has recently reinvented himself into a slimline Wurzel Gummidge clone. This transformation hasn't gone unnoticed as he was recently likened to 'Brad Pitt' by the dredlocked girl off her head on LSD in the cabaret tent at Glastonbury. Could talk a glass eye to sleep, or to at least be thankful that he wasn't a glass ear.

Dr_Evil Posted on 10/07/2008 12:32
FMTTM Posters

[:D]

Genius.

For a fat lad you're quite amusing Lisbon.

grantus Posted on 10/07/2008 12:34
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I knew you wouldn't be able to resist.

grantus Posted on 10/07/2008 12:35
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I did this thread a few years ago, only more accurate and way funnier, folk were begging me to do them (a first). Although, I must admit, he's not done badly.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 12:38
FMTTM Posters

I could just see you hovering and thought I'd put you out your misery.

grantus Posted on 10/07/2008 12:40
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I'm not miserable though lad. Feeling rather chipper lately.

As long as you enjoyed writing it, then that's all I could ask for.

You may carry on.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 12:41
FMTTM Posters

I didn't enjoy writing it, I have loads of work to do and the more time I spend on here the more pressure I put myself under. I wonder who I should do next...

grantus Posted on 10/07/2008 12:52
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Hmmmm. how about maxter, fonz, ripley's evil twin, or do none of these characters post anymore?

CrazyL Posted on 10/07/2008 12:52
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CrazyL - Been a regular poster for 3 years and still a complete unknown. Will never be unmasked in real life. NEVER! Possibly part of a geordie fundamentalist 'sleeper cell' which is embedding itself into FMTTM society? I put my faith in the scripture and teachings of the Chronicle. Praise be to Alan! Soon it will be time for jihad bonny lad.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 12:54
FMTTM Posters

LIDDLE_TOWERS - The confused ex rigger has made board ripples due to him mistaking FMTTM for Photobox as the board wanders through his 25 family photo albums. Has a big garden in Stainton or at least he has a photo of a big garden in Stainton which is the envy of everyone on the board. His conversations are full of carp as the experienced fisherman recalls tales of his ex-fishing partners and famous friends. Known on the board as 'Mario' due to his resemblance to the totally honest, non-attention seeking, Big Brother contestant of the same name.

grantus Posted on 10/07/2008 12:58
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LondonBoro

woodymfc Posted on 10/07/2008 13:06
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Hello

MarlonD Posted on 10/07/2008 13:07
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Lisbon, any chance of doing a profile on Boro_Bliss ?


Boromart Posted on 10/07/2008 13:17
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Lisbon you seem obsessed with bringing homosexuality into just about every other critique!

On an entirely different subject I think you should do yourself next, to prove that you like to take it as much as you like to give it.

MarlonD Posted on 10/07/2008 13:18
FMTTM Posters

Yeah Lisbon do as the bummer said.

The_Lizards_Jumpers Posted on 10/07/2008 13:27
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Liddle's garden is in Stainton rather than Stillington, or at least that's what he says.

bernieisgod Posted on 10/07/2008 13:30
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I hadn't really noticed an overabundance of homosexual comments to be honest!

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 13:45
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Only in the one's you're in Mart.

Already done Boro_bliss blurb, Marlon.

Holgateoldskool Posted on 10/07/2008 13:59
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Er, thanks, lisbon, I think! I will unveil myself at one of the London games - so you can buy me a pint, like.

And I promise not to be the prophet of doom or the grim reaper! Give me the chance to meet my number one fan Grantus too !!!!!

MarlonD Posted on 10/07/2008 14:02
FMTTM Posters

Ahh, so you have Lisbon. Carry on, top thread and quite amusing for a fat chunt.

Henry_Blofeld Posted on 10/07/2008 14:07
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"Recent revelations that Alves and his gang of youths would repeatedly surround and beat up a certain Capio/Lord David/Tony Drago will no doubt enamour him to the higher echelons of board society."

LOL it was more a case that we kicked the crap out of each other, he just once got an older kid to hold me back as he hit me, poor show.

But we were only 7!

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 14:10
FMTTM Posters

SuperBokSupper - The board fitness fanatic must go to the same gym as Dr Evil in the reverse dimension. Gained noteriety for his drugfuelled hallucinogenic habits and his birds swollen arse. SBS is one of the boards real characters, renowned for his kindness he would often push Mat_evans about in his wheelchair, most usually to the bar so he wouldn't have to queue up to get served. One of life's gentleman.

susy Posted on 10/07/2008 14:11
FMTTM Posters

Zoec - True lady of the board. Well tempered and humerous poster. Supportive of her fellow female posters in a non overbearing way. Comes out with absolute diamond comments suddenly and hilariously. Very witty but never ever nasty. One of the boards faves.

littlejimmy Posted on 10/07/2008 14:13
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Lisbon, you're a genius.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 14:14
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Susy - The board's medical expert and downright top girl. Never a bad word to say about anybody she's won a host of admirers with her witty and courageous attitude. Unfortunately, not even she would touch SuperBokSuppers lasses inflated arse. Recently been romantically linked with zoec.

ridsdale Posted on 10/07/2008 14:14
FMTTM Posters

Susy, that's more like a death post in the Gazette.


Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 14:15
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Jimmy, you'll say anything to get a blurb![:)]

littlejimmy Posted on 10/07/2008 14:16
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Nah, already got one. I'm sure you'd do a better one though.

susy Posted on 10/07/2008 14:17
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Why .... oh I see I will edit it, ever so slightly then!

Cheers LL btw [;)]


That better Rids?

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 14:26
FMTTM Posters

Thanks jimmy, I almost sensed some sincerity in your tone there.[;)]

ridsdale Posted on 10/07/2008 14:28
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Better Susy, still a bit creepy crawlish like though.

susy Posted on 10/07/2008 14:31
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rubbish, it is genuine, she's really nice. I tell my kids " If you cant say anything pleasant then dont say anything at all"

ridsdale Posted on 10/07/2008 14:32
FMTTM Posters

Silent kids must be a right bonus.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 14:34
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ridsdale - A board legend. Made his name many moons ago and after a brief absence returned with a flourish, rocking the foundations of the family home shared by Critical_Bill, Marlon_D and Butties. Often comes under attack for knowing his stuff but deals with it with usual good grace. Enjoys stoking up board fights and inducing LIDDLE_TOWERS to give birth to another 'mate' by asking 'Who is the hardest person in the world' at regular intervals.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 14:35
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I've had to edit yours Susy, sorry.

ridsdale Posted on 10/07/2008 14:36
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Lisbo, thanks for that fantastic tribute.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 14:37
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No worries ridsdale, you deserve it.

susy Posted on 10/07/2008 14:38
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Oi get that off there and I'll give you a snog [;)]

MarlonD Posted on 10/07/2008 14:39
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you forgot to mention that he stinks of stale P***, Lisbon.

Bandy Posted on 10/07/2008 14:39
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susy, less of the flirting! If you were out on a night out you'd be nowhere near these leeches

susy Posted on 10/07/2008 14:41
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no, apparently I only have eyes for the girls now [:(]

And that isnt flirting, its bribery!

Bandy Posted on 10/07/2008 14:42
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well only you should know your own sexuality unless you are genuinely on the other bus

ridsdale Posted on 10/07/2008 14:42
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Marlon, get one of 'the lads' to carve you a new brain from an off-cut in the timber yard.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 14:43
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Ridders![:D]

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 14:46
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woodymfc - One of the boards lower case experts and English lecturers. Straight from the Billingham school of hard knocks, woody fought through the ranks of a hardened up bringing to forge a fantastic career for himself on an internet message board. Now he's managed to break free from the shackles of billingham and into cyber space, the world is his oyster. Next stop, York!

Boromart Posted on 10/07/2008 14:46
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susy, calm down, saying that you will swing both ways is like the second best compliment that a man can pay you.

Bandy Posted on 10/07/2008 14:47
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the other girl has to be fit tho, we dont want no Boro boilers in on the act

susy Posted on 10/07/2008 14:49
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LL GO on then.

Boromart... whats the first best compliment?

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 14:50
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Scubahood - Not sure where to start with the black eyed outcast. He's one of the only posters to make Boro_Bliss look like a sensible well rounded intelligent humanbeing. Repetitive posts about seagulls, WASP and cannibal corpse leave the deluded halfwit trapped in his leather biker jacket, matching boots with red FMTTM bandana. Maybe he will evolve on to eagles (the music or the bird of prey) at some point or even get a job, whatever the future holds for the 'touched' one, I wish him luck.

LittleAwldGadge Posted on 10/07/2008 14:50
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I tell you what, that Susy might be getting on a bit but I still would!

Boromart Posted on 10/07/2008 14:53
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susy thats obvious, talking it up the S***ter


Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 14:53
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There you go Susy, as requested.

susy Posted on 10/07/2008 14:56
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Well better, sort of except he is a pervert... have you read his comments on this thread?


And who the **** is LittleAwldGadge?

LittleAwldGadge Posted on 10/07/2008 14:57
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Eh up lads, shes keen on me!

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 14:58
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It's probably flar.

Get_your_rat_out Posted on 10/07/2008 14:59
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Be flar being a sad C*** again creating another username

bernieisgod Posted on 10/07/2008 14:59
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susy - LittleAwldGadge sounds like someone who knows you! (or someone's grandad anyway)

Boromart Posted on 10/07/2008 15:00
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"pervert" -- excuse me? I'm not the one using her sexuality on an internet message-board, making promises of physical interaction to try and glean favours. What makes it more perverted is that Lisbon is young enough to be your son.

susy Posted on 10/07/2008 15:00
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Im not THAT old ffs


Lisbon is not young enough to be my son unless I had him in primary school that is. And I offered a snog, not a lesbian triste or botty bumping! That takes it from flirt to pervertion.

Big head.

Bandy Posted on 10/07/2008 15:01
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So susy is mid forties???

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 15:02
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Cheers Mart but you meant "looks young enough to be your son".

MarlonD Posted on 10/07/2008 15:02
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ridsdale, be wary of listening to panda boy. That's all.

bernieisgod Posted on 10/07/2008 15:02
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a gentleman never speculates on a ladies age - one of the most important rules of chivalry - so please desist bandy!

Bandy Posted on 10/07/2008 15:03
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why? why are women so far up their own arse that we cant ask their age? No wonder there's so much under age sex!

Boromart Posted on 10/07/2008 15:04
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no I meant ACTS young enough to be her son...although that puppy fat does make you look a bit youthful.

susy Posted on 10/07/2008 15:04
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And you are wrong Bandy too.

easycomeeasygo Posted on 10/07/2008 15:12
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botty bumping :)

LittleAwldGadge Posted on 10/07/2008 15:14
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I am NOT that TOZZER Flar thank you very much indeed!

Susy - you must be getting on a bit if you have 4 kids?

Boromart Posted on 10/07/2008 15:16
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now thats a little below teh belt LAG and to be honest I know women who have had 4 kids to 5 differant fathers before tehy reach 18, your sister for one.

bernieisgod Posted on 10/07/2008 15:16
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"Susy - you must be getting on a bit if you have 4 kids?"

ur jokin aren't ye - these days there are girls in mid-20's out there with 4 kids (me daughter-in-law for one!)

susy Posted on 10/07/2008 15:16
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[:O]

flar Posted on 10/07/2008 15:18
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lmfao! hes got a point tho susy [:)]

susy Posted on 10/07/2008 15:20
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ive only got 2 kids though!

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 15:21
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get_your_rat_out - One of the boards most perverse and tolerant posters. Once known for stalking the board birds, subsequent rejection made him gravitate towards a new direction and now he promotes zero tolerance to pretty much anything at all as taught by his father Raymond Mallon. Being a short tempered little bugger he will probably be one of the first board personalities to go down for a cyber stretch. He'd probably NUKE all the B****** wardens and escape though, so no dramas.

bernieisgod Posted on 10/07/2008 15:23
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susy - that means you could be any age from about 14 then!
frankly, it's none of our business anyway! [:)]

Get_your_rat_out Posted on 10/07/2008 15:25
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[:D]

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 15:26
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Lefty - One of the funniest posters on the board, when he can be bothered to post. Lives & breathes Middlesbrough and would never be seen dead without his Adidas Samba and Pringle jumper. The pinnacle of board anonymity, the only poster who could play football with half the board members and still no one knows what he looks like. Knows zoec personally though.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 15:31
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Stedontsurf - One of the new generation of posters, he made his name on the board by not surfing, possibly. Creater of one of the most tedious and unoriginal 450 post threads of all time, he should probably be forced to live in the Ivory Towers with boro_bliss for at least 10 years to prevent such tediousness ever happening again. Oh and by the way, the last poster to post on this thread wins a hand job off bobstermarley.

zzzzz Posted on 10/07/2008 15:34
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Two gems in one week, this and the oi liddle thread. Spot on Lisbon.

benidorm2boro Posted on 10/07/2008 15:35
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as i dont want to be last i will get in now then.

Libbins Posted on 10/07/2008 15:38
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this threads mesmerizing, in a strange way

bernieisgod Posted on 10/07/2008 15:40
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it's pandering to our ego's that's why - either we are basking in the glow of a mention or we are trawling for a mention! - either way we are hooked! [:)]

Libbins Posted on 10/07/2008 15:41
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I'm glad my cyber-existance hasn't been condensed into a tiny little paragraph at the moment really.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 15:44
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Algarve - The Big A, as he is known, is the boards namedropper extrordinaire. Renowned for his generosity in allowing rob_fmttm to share his apartment on several occassions in the Algarve. he openly enthused about the heat generated from Rob's cheeks on such venture's and was keen to invite him back to stay with him again to save on the current risisng electricity bill. An original board grandad, can only post for several minutes before his alzheimers kicks in and he forgets what he's doing.

bernieisgod Posted on 10/07/2008 15:44
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trawling net out there Libbins! [:)]

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 15:45
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Don't worry Libbins, I almost wrote yours once but needed to learn a bit more of your character before I could post it. It was too complimentary!

Henry_Blofeld Posted on 10/07/2008 15:48
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He looks like Kojak.

Libbins Posted on 10/07/2008 15:51
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This worries me.

zzzzz Posted on 10/07/2008 15:51
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Lisbon legend, the boards own man of letters, Oscar Wilde. Profligate on subjects as wide as himself, such as weight, shin splints, London, dead neighbours and popping into Greggs. Spends hours friutlessly dreaming up ways of attracting bobstermarley's attention with "over here" posts.

Henry_Blofeld Posted on 10/07/2008 15:53
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zzzzz - previous clique member and block17 turn coat who is one of many who refuses to admit his previous username.

bernieisgod Posted on 10/07/2008 15:54
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Oh, this had been such a good-natured thread too!

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 15:54
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zzzzz.[:D] What is your previous username>?

zzzzz Posted on 10/07/2008 15:55
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huan kerr

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 15:56
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Really?

Henry_Blofeld Posted on 10/07/2008 15:58
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Thought so, he totally denied it too when I said it was him.

Once a vvanker always a vvanker.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 15:59
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So that's where you've been hiding.

zzzzz Posted on 10/07/2008 16:00
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And before that on the old fmttm zzzzz.

The old zzzzz got banned during the putsch when you only had to mention her that shouldnt have been mentioned to get banned.

zzzzz Posted on 10/07/2008 16:01
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Bateman I love you.

wee_daft_boris Posted on 10/07/2008 16:01
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this board is rather convoluted for a novice!

Bandy Posted on 10/07/2008 16:05
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Lisbon profile: Portly nomadic type from Billingham. A likeable rogue, with quick witted humour and a penchant for the odd cream cake, coupled with a pint or six. Insecure at times but always very welcoming. Played football to a good standard but age has caught up with him now.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 16:05
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I refute that last sentence! Well the bit about the age anyway.[:o)]

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 16:10
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Henry_Blofeld - One of the cyber worlds misfits and most complicated characters. Organises football teams to create an army of friends and then insults everyone else in cyberspace in order to create battles for his army to fight. Now has a Czechoslovakian army, a Polish army and an Eston Army but is still recruiting and trying to work out ways to combat the opposition suicide bombers like boro_bliss. A work in progress.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 16:18
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Slipshod - One of the boards golden oldies and most humble posters. You would never catch him boasting about selling his own business or buying a Mercedes Benz with this weeks wage as he would much rather donate his money to charity. Has a couple of kids but we best not mention those as it's a sorer subject than SuperBokSuppers lasses arse!

grantus Posted on 10/07/2008 16:19
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What a collection of folk!

MarlonD Posted on 10/07/2008 16:20
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*stands up & applauds*

well done Lisbon. One of two things will happen now. This will reach 4 or 500 or you will get sacked.

Great thread though.


slipshod Posted on 10/07/2008 16:21
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I don't get wages anymore [:D] and i am only 35 you cheeky get.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 16:21
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Are you, I had you down as twice that.[:o)]

Eddie_Catflap Posted on 10/07/2008 16:24
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Piggy Nichol - First rose to fame as the latest 'uncle' of sweet william. Went on to prove himself somewhat of a renaissance man by posting on several topics, including slow cookery, running with the pamplona bulls and foreign football matches, which became his best known and most popular contribution.

A genuine board wit and newly rebranded as 'Piggy', he has retired from travelling around europe like a footballing Kane from Kung Fu and spends his time pestering people for games of 5 a side or mooching up and down local hills.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 16:24
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Marlon, I think it will be sacked as I set this day aside to write a 75 page report.[V]

bernieisgod Posted on 10/07/2008 16:26
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lisbon - you seem to spend much of your time writing reports - can you not just recycle old ones? [:)]

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 16:27
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I might have to! Of on holiday to Center Parcs tomorrow for 4 days so might take it with me. [V]

bernieisgod Posted on 10/07/2008 16:29
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depends who you are going with but you may get some grief doing that!

Piggy Posted on 10/07/2008 16:29
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Goalscrounger - Mathematical genius who moonlights at Christmas as a CD compiliation compiler for K-Tel despite being on The Most Wanted list of the Musical Artists Copyright Society. Has progressed at work mainly due to stealing assembly ideas from this board. Also, an ace mountain biker who is slowed down only by having to hold onto the mortar board and the gown getting trapped in the spokes.

Piggy Posted on 10/07/2008 16:34
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Eddie, thats weird. I was writing that last post at the same time as you did me and I very nearly did you instead of GS.

Thats finally convinced me that you and the board exist in my imagination only.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 16:35
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That's really weird cos I was just going to do Piggy and Eddie did him!

Piggy Posted on 10/07/2008 16:36
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I'll settle for Eddies, thanks Lisbon.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 16:37
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I feel hurt.[:)]

bernieisgod Posted on 10/07/2008 16:39
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I got a mention ages ago and felt great - 5 mins of fame etc...
but that was a long time ago now and the glow is fading - now I'm jealous of those getting a mention now

ah, the fickleness of fate!

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 16:41
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Look at me, I wrote 79 of the F***ers and got 3 in return, that's gratitude for you.[;)]

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 16:46
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SoSmo - Once a board mainstay and one of the best characters on the board but was moved on to the graveyard shift and is only allowed to ask what people are having for their lunch or comment on her workmates. Has briefly flirted with a return to former glories but the jury is still out.

Piggy Posted on 10/07/2008 16:49
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Eddie Catflap - At first glance a comedy genius with the much missed Michael Owen Diaries. But actually something much more sinister and currently gathering enough blackmail information via this catflaporama surveillance system to extract enough money from people who post when drunk to retire to the Bahamas.
Taller in real life.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 16:50
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OneTwoMany - The boards official navigator somehow manages to find his way home from any pub in the world. This is usually because he sneaks off 8 hours before everyone else though. Loves the women and can often be seen showing lasses 'his guitar' round his flat every week. It must have had more visitors than the Tate Gallery.

bernieisgod Posted on 10/07/2008 16:55
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"Look at me, I wrote 79 of the F***ers and got 3 in return, that's gratitude for you"

good point Lisbon -

Lisbon - key mainstay of the board, source of many of the more interesting/entertaining and long-running threads. Age is indeterminate but probably in 30's - will grow to be a blackmailer with all of the info he is collecting on other posters!

Lisbonlegend Posted on 10/07/2008 17:15
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Cheers Bernie.[;)]

CrazyL Posted on 10/07/2008 18:40
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Blackandwhitedreams / johnanderson

Fat, friendless, small penised, limp wristed, slack jawed, sweaty, pseudo-geordie wannabee. Charisma-less, pointless, puerile, witless, felcher of octogenarian pansies. Bummer of fay, toothless, wrinkly, decrepit, septagenarian poofters.

janplanner Posted on 10/07/2008 19:14
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ahhh, this thread has me thinking that getting a proper job was a big mistake...

Lisbonlegend Posted on 14/07/2008 16:18
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Why Jan?

gary_llama Posted on 14/07/2008 17:36
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Do me x 10.

smifter Posted on 15/07/2008 01:10
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"get_your_rat_out - One of the boards most perverse and tolerant posters. Once known for stalking the board birds, subsequent rejection made him gravitate towards a new direction and now he promotes zero tolerance to pretty much anything at all as taught by his father Raymond Mallon. Being a short tempered little bugger he will probably be one of the first board personalities to go down for a cyber stretch. He'd probably NUKE all the B****** wardens and escape though, so no dramas. "

[:D] Brilliant

smifter Posted on 15/07/2008 01:10
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Whoops double post

Great thread by the way!

neilg Posted on 15/07/2008 01:21
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i cant wait till we get talking irrelevant trivia once more.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 15/07/2008 08:31
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neil, do you ever sleep or are you constantly 'alert'?

boro_exile Posted on 15/07/2008 08:46
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it's back!

neilg Posted on 15/07/2008 11:29
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Kevin is a gerbil!

fatsuma Posted on 15/07/2008 11:44
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Lisbonlegend - Nice bunch of guys.

fatsuma Posted on 15/07/2008 11:53
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Capybara - Know-all Nemesis

fatsuma Posted on 15/07/2008 11:54
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zoec - Smart cookie

MsCurly Posted on 15/07/2008 11:56
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Sorry to interrupt, but how did Eggheads go, Fats?

Did you get to snog Daphne? [:)]

fatsuma Posted on 15/07/2008 11:57
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grantus - half of the best double act of the 21st century, never to have yet appeared on the Edinburgh fringe

neilg Posted on 15/07/2008 11:57
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No but I did! ;-O x

fatsuma Posted on 15/07/2008 11:59
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Great thanks, Curls.

I would have got you Dermot's autograph, but Jeremy Vine was standing in for him.

MsCurly Posted on 15/07/2008 12:00
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No Dermot? [:O]

I quite like Jeremy, but he's not as handsome as Big D. [:)]

Did you give a good account of yourself?

fatsuma Posted on 15/07/2008 12:01
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Daphne just sits there and smiles very sweetly.

I have to say though, I found Judith's stern bolshyness surprisingly seductive in the flesh!


fatsuma Posted on 15/07/2008 12:04
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I got my first question right!!

Lisbonlegend Posted on 15/07/2008 12:36
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It's all gone 'Natash Kaplinsky'!

zoec Posted on 15/07/2008 12:51
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Sterling work, LL.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 15/07/2008 13:39
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MsCurly - What can you say about the Curly one that hasn't already been said. She's a woman of great principle, raising 12 children under her bosom and also being a carer in the community to numpties like captain5 and his ilk. Has been absent from the board for awhile as she attempts to breast feed Bandito in Pizza Express without grantus seeing but should make a return soon.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 15/07/2008 13:51
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Fatsuma - The Board's very own Jack Nicholson in 'One Flew Over the Cuckoo Nest' complete with original haircut. Once gained day release from the asylum to play football with the trendier board members in Regents Park but failed to return before his curfew and has been locked in a padded cell with Capybara ever since.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 15/07/2008 14:07
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Zoec - Widely reknowned as the brains of the boards female population by various thickos that post. Surprisingly, and in no way at all linked with her superior intelligence, is the fact that she very rarely flirts with any of the male board members. Would be spoilt for choice if she ever did loosen her cyber corset with flar already unzipped and at the front of the queue.

fatsuma Posted on 15/07/2008 14:07
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Funny that, I was just looking through the pictures taken at that game!






Link: Lisbon: White shirt? You're in my team!

flar Posted on 15/07/2008 14:08
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Lisbon - I find your insinuations quite unsavoury.

Especially given Zoec is ginger!

fatsuma Posted on 15/07/2008 14:12
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And from what I remember of my excursion in the Park that night, flar had his buttons undone, not a zip!

Lisbonlegend Posted on 15/07/2008 14:20
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Capybara - The 1950's breakdance champion has since hung up his knee pads and whiles away the hours (when not in his padded cell) watching the trains coming in, and going out again, kind of like a modern day pasty white 'Marvin Gaye'. The master of disguise has various guises on his day trips from the asylum including Dr Emmet Brown from Back to the Future, the professor from the Wheetos adverts or Old 'Highlander' from the film of ths same name.

zzzzz Posted on 15/07/2008 14:22
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borobliss - reincarnated from the Germanic Hordes infamous for rattling an ex board name and something else unmentionable. Multi-lingual large bosomed beauty who is far too shy to reveal on a public messageboard that she shaves her clout and likes nothing more than a night in the bath with a good book and tickling the little man in the boat.

flar Posted on 15/07/2008 14:23
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"little man in the boat."

PMSL!

Pauluka Posted on 15/07/2008 14:24
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zzzzz [:D]

benidorm2boro Posted on 15/07/2008 14:29
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zzzzzz classic

zoec Posted on 15/07/2008 14:40
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[V] stop it with the ginger rumours, perm-boy. I'm not even slightly ginger. Not a smidgeon.

Pauluka Posted on 15/07/2008 14:42
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Come off it Zoe, you have told us many a times about your Foxes P1ss Pubes

rick4974 Posted on 15/07/2008 14:43
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loved scubahoods LL, it had me in fits of laughter. keep up the good work, but leave me and T_I_T out of this please.



thank you

zoec Posted on 15/07/2008 14:44
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I see the Swiss finishing school wasn't wasted on you, Paul.

Pauluka Posted on 15/07/2008 14:45
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Get out of town

Mario_Marconi Posted on 15/07/2008 14:52
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Oh dear, tangerine candy floss?

Brick_Tamland Posted on 15/07/2008 14:55
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Welcome back, zoec.

zoec Posted on 15/07/2008 14:56
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[:)] hello Brick.

fatsuma Posted on 15/07/2008 14:56
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Have you been away zoec?

blind_date_reject Posted on 15/07/2008 14:58
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My turn now lol

im feeling left out

go on [:D]

zoec Posted on 15/07/2008 14:59
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Not really, fatsuma. Just at the mercy of pesky, meddling IT people deciding to limit what sites can be accessed.

fatsuma Posted on 15/07/2008 15:05
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That's why I can only post when I'm working from home.

I'm only on here til I've had my morning coffee, then I'm going to crack on with my work!!

Libbins Posted on 15/07/2008 15:06
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You found anything worth criticizing about me yet Lisbon?

Pauluka Posted on 15/07/2008 15:07
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Libbins - Tvvat

The end

boro_exile Posted on 15/07/2008 15:10
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after my faux pas earlier i think mine will just read "slow as fook on the uptake"

Libbins Posted on 15/07/2008 15:11
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[:)]

Lisbonlegend Posted on 15/07/2008 15:26
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Not yet Libbins. It's like a long slow turd, it takes it's time but it'll be satisfying in the end.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 15/07/2008 16:51
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Easycomeasygo – The boards resident master of put downs and underground music critic recently found fame discovering a band called ‘ColdPlay’. The next big thing in his eyes, nailed on, get your wedge on it.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 15/07/2008 17:00
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throcking_man -

Henry_Blofeld Posted on 15/07/2008 17:02
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The_Throcking_man : an unknown cyber stalker who made a complete tit of himself by forgetting which account he was logged in with, then tried to cover this up by saying it was his mother this would followed up by a double bluff and claims that his mother is indeed dead.

PinkPonce Posted on 15/07/2008 17:02
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Leaving us in suspense lisbon [:D]

grantus Posted on 15/07/2008 17:04
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I'm the Morecomb to his Wise.

fatsuma Posted on 15/07/2008 17:04
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The grist to his mill!

Lisbonlegend Posted on 15/07/2008 17:07
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I thought I'd leave that one to you lot, Ponce.[;)]

PinkPonce Posted on 15/07/2008 17:08
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The_Throcking_man : (See also Downingman, ZZZZZZ) tedious cyber stalker who can be seen following the pinkponce closely from thread to thread. Desperate to rise from the ponces shadows he was recently drafted in as a bitch to MarlonD, Critial_Bill and Kevin_Bacon-Butties on their upgoing Backstreets Back Tour.

easycomeeasygo Posted on 15/07/2008 17:09
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wahey!!!

i got one!!!!

bit short like lisbon [:D]

Lisbonlegend Posted on 15/07/2008 17:13
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It was longer but didn't think the last bit was funny and then edited it. Then I couldn't be arsed to think so just posted it.[:)]

easycomeeasygo Posted on 15/07/2008 17:14
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fair play

rick4974 Posted on 15/07/2008 17:16
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come on then LL, get 1 of me done

rick4974 Posted on 15/07/2008 17:30
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axel1974 - the guy with the thai wife, kids and lifestyle. He loves his gadgets, especially nokia n95 batteries that blow your mobile up. This lad loves his parmo's especially after another set up on the local karaoke. a guy who's impressions leave you squirming rather than smiling and a 30+ guy who loves his toys[;)]. a guy who knows both fischer and robert the red nose reindeer. and most importantly, a guy who is clueless when it comes to diy!!

Lisbonlegend Posted on 16/07/2008 12:15
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Rob_FMTTM - The multi-talented power magnate and former successful promotional model of the 'Christmas Elf Make up kit' and 'Black coal miners jacket' is the boards 'official' boss. Widely Known for his raging 'Alex Ferguson' hairdryer type temper on the board, few posters dare mess with the 4 stringed axe man. His band 'Shrug' are on the verge of superstardom and have been for at least 45 years, playing their hits such as 'Bertha, lovely Bertha, sometimes I think you're a dream'. Aswell as music and modelling, Rob is also a great writer and has ghostwritten bestsellers such as Bravo Two Zero and Rosie & Jim. The board wouldn't exist without his inspiring presence and the energy generated from his glowing face.

boro_exile Posted on 16/07/2008 12:21
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[:)]

ridsdale Posted on 16/07/2008 12:23
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Lisbon, spot on the mark as usual!

Lisbonlegend Posted on 16/07/2008 12:42
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Critical_Bill - One of the board's real and central characters is shrouded in an air of mystery / misery (delete as appropriate). Little is known about the 'happy go lucky' soap watching Curly Watts lookalikey engineer that rarely leaves his house except for a his annual 2 week trip to Cyprus. Typing away from his office in the hub of a secret engineering firm over the border, a job which he is not overly enthused about, he manages to hilariously shoot down almost every board member with his witty and cutting remarks. A person who's hand you would definitely like to shake if it wasn't fiddlingly glued to his manhood whilst twitching over pictures of Racquel from Corrie.

The big boned board icon is a whirlwind of everyday human activity and once a year even dresses up as 'Jason' to play 'bob an apple' at his 'friends' Halloween party. Is looking for a new job, preferably one where he doesn't have to move, can watch TV all day and criticise people in total anonymity. A job at the Samaritans sounds ideal.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 16/07/2008 14:05
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rick4974 - The board's resident DJ and karaoke king. Goes by the pseudonym of 'the chinless wonder' when belting out his tunes round the Eston 'strip'. His claim to fame is being so bad at Karaoke that he was once banned for life from his local hostelry. Possibly has autism, hence the 4974 section of his name, either that or he's so dim he struggles to remember his house alarm. Models his trendy new look on Admiral Ackbar from return of the Jedi.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 16/07/2008 14:27
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Kevin_Bacon_Butties - Known as the boards good samaritan due to his kind hearted and compassionate nature. His silver tongue woo'd LIDDLE_TOWERS into wanting to give him a great big hug, possibly the type of hug were the cartoon characters eyes pop out of their head. His intelligence and vocabulary are not in question but his tact could maybe do with a little bit of work. Lives with Marlon_D and Critical_Bill in a small townhouse along with 7 Polish people. Is a world leader in the type and use of anal probes (inclusive of dremel tools).

Lisbonlegend Posted on 16/07/2008 14:37
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London_Boro - The boards very own musical executive exudes P_Diddy type coolness. LB's main musical mistake was not signing up Rob's band Shrug which meant that he became so successful he had to move to the capital. Doesn't associate with board members away from the board and who can blame him when he has friends like Amy Winehouse, Pete Burns, Donny Tourettes and Sid Vicious to socialise with as oppose to grantus, Onewtwomany, flar and Pauluka. Don't bother asking him for a festival freebie though as he's tight as arses!

janplanner Posted on 16/07/2008 14:49
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because occasionally i miss this kind of nonsense! [:)]

Lisbonlegend Posted on 16/07/2008 15:07
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Janplanner - Once the boards resident hottie, little has been seen of her since she was stuck next to sasboro on a flight back from Roma. Rumour has it that sas, the boards Paul McKenna clone, hypnotised her with his mindnumbingly dulcet tones during her in-flight meal of a cheese and tomato omellete. further rumour has it that she was seen recently celebrating her birthday in Auschwitz with a feather boa and party hat, a present bought for her by the ever thoughtful sasboro, to cheer her up.

fatsuma Posted on 16/07/2008 15:09
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Lisbers - your uncannily accurate descriptions are either evidence that you have a combination of the common touch and a touch of genius, or that you have spent the past 3 years updating a spreadsheet with snippets of info about each poster, gleaned from their ad hoc scribblings as posted on here, fuelled by your anal fascination with the minutiae of their virtual existences!!!

Torn between the two at the moment.


But keep going, pal, it's good for a giggle!

JEFF_BLOWERS Posted on 16/07/2008 15:10
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what the hell

Lisbonlegend Posted on 16/07/2008 15:14
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Sasboro - The boards very own Paul McKenna can use his hypnotic tones to lure even the most strong willed of posters into his world of joy. One of the boards funniest and most unnervingly positive posters, never has a board character inspired so many people with such enthusiasm as sasboro has. Never a bad word to say about anything or anybody, with 4 houses and a board bird in tow, he is the icon on which people should be judged. One of th.....*And sleep*

Lisbonlegend Posted on 16/07/2008 15:25
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Libbins - I'll come back to this one.

London_Boro Posted on 16/07/2008 15:28
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[:O]

I'm actually very generous!

[:D]

Lisbonlegend Posted on 16/07/2008 15:35
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Boro_exile - One of the boards top lads and an all round good egg. People are still unsure why he has been exiled or even where he's been exiled to. Is he in the Cotswolds or maybe somewhere less exotic than that such as Torbay. There's a theory that if he was exiled somewhere decent like the Algarve or Australia he would somehow capture it in his username. Another theory is maybe he's in a place called Exile, just down the road from Exmoor and round the corner from Exeter. One thing is for certain, only he knows the place of his own existence. Well him and probably Capybara, who even knows the whereabouts of the invisible platform to Hogwarts school at Kings Cross Station.

zoec Posted on 16/07/2008 15:38
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I know where boro_exile is. He's below a Chinese karaoke singer.

boro_exile Posted on 16/07/2008 15:43
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cheers lisbers, made my day - i did you a dis-service though and expected something far less complimentary - pint on me next season for you sir

[:)] zoec - he's still rockin out as well - was his birthday last wednesday - had me up til nearly 3am (oo-er!)

Lisbonlegend Posted on 16/07/2008 15:54
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No worries. Make it two pints and I'll write you an even better one.[;)]

boro_exile Posted on 16/07/2008 15:56
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[:)] done

Lisbonlegend Posted on 16/07/2008 16:03
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Of course you are, LB![:)]

Lisbonlegend Posted on 17/07/2008 15:18
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Libbins - The board's very own Keith Chegwin and one time editor of Smash Hits famously appeared on 'Crackerjack' alongside Jimmy 'captain5' Crankie. Respected by all and with a musical knowledge second to none he can even 'Slide to the left, slide to the right, criss cross' in one flowing move. Rumour has it he even backscuttled Maggie Phillbin in the alley behind Zanzibar on his mate's birthday for a bet. But that's a different story.

Libbins Posted on 17/07/2008 15:23
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[:D]

Lisbonlegend Posted on 17/07/2008 15:33
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Did you think I'd forgotten?[;)]

Libbins Posted on 17/07/2008 15:36
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It's quite accurate actually, in terms of the Keith Chegwin comparison.
[;)]

Broughton Posted on 17/07/2008 15:36
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Woody......Managed to get me banned off the Jawdie Board [:)]
That chap will never be forgiven !!
Woody has done more than anyone to wreck the Tees/Tyne peace relationship that has been built over the past 60 odd years since Newcastle won anything.

mat_evans Posted on 17/07/2008 15:36
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Jesus!! People are giving out pints for blurbs....might have to get involved...whose not been done...pipe up or forever hold your peace.

zoec Posted on 17/07/2008 15:40
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How's the Keith Chegwin comparison accurate, Libbins? Don't tell me you've appeared on a gameshow naked apart from a pith helmet?

Libbins Posted on 17/07/2008 15:43
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There was a helmet showing alright, but it wasn't pith.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 17/07/2008 15:45
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Mat_Evans - Known in cyber circles as wheelz stalker. The fluffy haired lightweight even broke his own leg so he could spend time in a wheelchair just like his idol. Unfortunately he didn't have wheelz charisma so ended up being pushed around the local pubs by his sidekick and carer, SuperBokSupper, scrounging for donations. After giving up on trying to be wheelz, he has his heart set on becoming the new Marlon_D, has purchased some stilts to complement his curvature of the spine and has even been known to shout 'TIMBER' as he crashes back down to earth.

MarlonD Posted on 17/07/2008 15:48
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[:D]


mat_evans Posted on 17/07/2008 16:05
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I've already been done, you can't give me two blurbs and you deffo ain't getting a pint off me.....anyway Wheelz isn't a bad bloke to aspire too if you ask me.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 17/07/2008 16:29
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How rude. I thought I was quite kind with that blurb.

mat_evans Posted on 17/07/2008 16:36
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"he has set his heart on becoming the new Marlon_D"

You can't get much more cruel [:(]

[:D]

Lisbonlegend Posted on 17/07/2008 16:47
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Fletch - The board's big hearted Neanderthal has been known to raise thousands for charity, most of it by accident though due to his resemblance to Pudsy Bear. Pudsy will next year come dressed in Adidas samba and will shout "Ow ya daft C***, give me some money" at passers by, should be a top seller. As a child growing up in Middlesbrough, Pudsy used to down quadruple Tizers and windmill his way to the front of the ice-cream van queue for a screwball. He's changed since then though and now goes for the more healthy 'mini milk' option.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 17/07/2008 17:00
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NedKat - One of the boards many sailor boys, he amazingly manages to combine his captaincy of the nuclear powered submarine with his outrageous board ramblings and tolerant banter. Always one to think outside of the box, he recently plotted the course of his submarine using tracing paper when there was a power cut. Looks more like Brutus than popeye and has a mansion in the US to retire to once his sailing days are over, which they probably are.


Link: Brutus

wee_daft_boris Posted on 17/07/2008 17:01
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I'd forgotten all about the Screwball, a legend of the ice cream van!

Lisbonlegend Posted on 17/07/2008 17:43
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Brick_Tamland - One of the brighter board personalities and another exile in Germany. Rumoured to have been chasing boro_bliss across Europe, she has managed to 'disappear' again and escape his clutches, as if by magic. Recently won an award for the most useless qualification of all time when studying for a degree in 'the effect of the recession on German sex tourists with media studies'. Hopes to get a job as a sports editor, either that or a part as the gimp in 'Cabaret' down London's West End.

littlejimmy Posted on 17/07/2008 19:21
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[V]

Brick_Tamland Posted on 17/07/2008 19:23
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That's actually fairly accurate. Apart from the bright bit.

SirLofty Posted on 17/07/2008 19:51
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Im so glad I clicked on this thread [:D]

guisBOROugh Posted on 17/07/2008 19:57
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Is that poor attempt to receive your own Blurb SirLofty?

SirLofty Posted on 17/07/2008 20:01
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You really think I want a blurb? All I get told is im a 17 year old tw*t who has a massive hate campaign against smokers. So I dont look for one, I P*** myself laughing at the ones your getting [;)]

guisBOROugh Posted on 17/07/2008 20:04
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Meh

jimmythequiz Posted on 17/07/2008 21:09
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bet you cant get an accurate one for me Lisbon

mat_evans Posted on 17/07/2008 21:11
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JimmytheQuiz - likes Quizzes and/or Quizzing others

paulsugruessockwasher Posted on 17/07/2008 21:12
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Don't suppose you can do one for me can you?

guisBOROugh Posted on 17/07/2008 21:28
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paulsugruessockwasher 's username is hard to read without first seeing 'Paul Sucks C0ck Watcher'.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 18/07/2008 08:23
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I was going to do you lj but you said you didn't want one!

Erm, Jimmythequiz, you're probably right.

littlejimmy Posted on 18/07/2008 09:05
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It was like a woman saying that she doesn't want anything for her birthday.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 18/07/2008 15:51
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[:D] Ok, I'll do you then.

Mickey_2003 Posted on 18/07/2008 18:16
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Do me, even though I rarely post.

Space_Face Posted on 18/07/2008 19:16
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Brilliant [:D]

Lisbonlegend Posted on 19/07/2008 00:24
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little_jimmy - jimmy is the boards engineering legend. Another one of LIDDLE_TOWERS best 'mates', they were never far from one anothers sides during their happy childhood. jimmy would do anything for his best pal including handing over his laughing cow cheese triangles and 'Break Time' strawberry milkshake at lunch times. Things reached a head though when LIDDLE called him a fat little arab. In his vain attempts to please his friend Mario he moved in with the Sheikh Khalifa bin Zayed Al Nahyan and began designing the biggest fishing net in the world for his best pal. His plan to build it next to the Riverside Stadium may prove to be a disaster though as LIDDLE very rarely visits the stadium. Next up on lj's list to please LIDDLE is to build a giant multicoloured toaster by the stadium in order to keep him happy at breakfast times.

gary_llama Posted on 19/07/2008 00:25
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Do one for me, like.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 19/07/2008 00:32
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Jesus Christ, what have I started.[:o)]

kazza Posted on 19/07/2008 00:33
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you started so you can finish [:D]

Lisbonlegend Posted on 19/07/2008 00:37
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How many posters are one this board?

kazza Posted on 19/07/2008 00:38
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about 5,000 [:D]

Cecil_J_Mctumshie Posted on 19/07/2008 00:41
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still waiting my turn

Lisbonlegend Posted on 19/07/2008 00:43
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No pressure like.[:)]

guisBOROugh Posted on 19/07/2008 00:44
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Ill do one for myself I reckon.

guisBOROugh - Clearly the most attractive personality on this message board (and the best looking too). He is easily distinguishable from Guisboro, who is the other publicy claimed FMTTM poster from the horrific little town.
guisBOROugh i possibly the most underrated poster of the site and should be given more recognition, despite limited posting.

kazza Posted on 19/07/2008 15:52
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c'mon your slacking

Lisbonlegend Posted on 19/07/2008 15:54
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[:D]

Lisbonlegend Posted on 20/07/2008 13:47
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Love hangovers me like.

wee_daft_boris Posted on 20/07/2008 13:49
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Can't beat a good hangover, I vomited blood in the bin under my desk at work yesterday. Project Manager was a little unimpressed to say the least!

Lisbonlegend Posted on 20/07/2008 13:50
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That sounds gross, are you sure it was a hangover?

wee_daft_boris Posted on 20/07/2008 13:52
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I'm not entirely sure, I was fine immediately after it though so whatever it was seems to have cleared up. Managed an easy going 5 pints at the Ballina Mardi Gras last night as well.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 20/07/2008 13:54
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What's the Ballina Mardi Gras?

wee_daft_boris Posted on 20/07/2008 13:57
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Ballina is a small town in West Ireland and they have a Salmon festival every year sponsored by Guinness. The Mardi Gras is a street parade followed by firework display and was pretty good to be honest. I was quite impressed despite thoughts of the "fairs" we have in Teesside.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 20/07/2008 14:11
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Do you live in Ireland?

wee_daft_boris Posted on 20/07/2008 14:39
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I work over here on a 10 and 4 rotation. I live in Kirkby in Cleveland.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 20/07/2008 14:42
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What do you do like?

wee_daft_boris Posted on 20/07/2008 14:45
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Project Controls for a new gas terminal over here.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 20/07/2008 15:09
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Good stuff. Have you got an engineering degree then?

kazza Posted on 20/07/2008 15:49
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less of the chat, you still got around 4,650 posters to do [:D]

Lisbonlegend Posted on 20/07/2008 15:50
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I'm off on Monday so I might try and get through a 2,000 then.[;)]

OPEO Posted on 20/07/2008 21:44
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Well I'm a bit miffed. If the ball comes this way I shall take it home.

ridsdale Posted on 20/07/2008 21:55
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littlejimmy; army brat who proved a great disappontment to his sergeant major father for being a great big wuss. His dad showed him how to hit the bullies back, but jimmy was a pacifist from an early age.

He dedicated his life to standing up for the poor and the weak and that is what lead him to his present career as a quantity surveyor.

Racism so upsets jimmy that he is forced to reside in the all white town of Thirsk, as he cannot abide to see racism in action. He also sends his kids to private schools so they can see at first hand the hypocricy of a two tier education system.

Jimmy's politics reach into all parts of his life and he is a keen enviromentalist. He has his Mini Cooper painted in the colours of the Greenpeace movement with Amnesty International wing mirrors.

Jimmy is a founding member of the Thirsk 'Free Range Turnip' society, dedicated to fair treatment of farm vegetables.

elnino1 Posted on 20/07/2008 23:25
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SOme names on here, thought Jax may have had a mention!

kazza Posted on 20/07/2008 23:47
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anybody in touch with jax

captain5 Posted on 20/07/2008 23:54
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Doris Stokes, Kazza.

Wow, didn't realise how obsessed Rids was with lj.

ridsdale Posted on 20/07/2008 23:57
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Jimmy was feeling a tad left out, he will be more pleased with his inclusion by me than being excluded.

kazza Posted on 20/07/2008 23:59
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doris stokes? she was a spiritualist

captain5 Posted on 21/07/2008 00:09
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Lovely lass. Neither a large or a small.

kazza Posted on 21/07/2008 00:12
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ya talking in riddles captain, explain


captain5 Posted on 21/07/2008 00:16
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Not really.

If she's not a large or a small, what is she likely to be??

kazza Posted on 21/07/2008 00:19
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medium, haha got ya, was going to say in between[:D] was she really

captain5 Posted on 21/07/2008 00:20
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FFS Kazza. [:X]

kazza Posted on 21/07/2008 00:30
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did she do any readings, wish i had known
lisbon will be thanking us upping his thread [:D] wont ya lisbon
night captain [|)]

captain5 Posted on 21/07/2008 00:31
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No problem. I'll be in soon.

Henry_Blofeld Posted on 21/07/2008 00:51
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"He also sends his kids to private schools so they can see at first hand the hypocricy of a two tier education system." [:D]


Big whoosh for Kazza

wee_daft_boris Posted on 21/07/2008 08:41
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I've got a QS degree Lisbon but saw the light a couple of years ago when the company I worked for wouldn't pay subbies and they were going to the wall over it and threatening all the site lads. Project controls is a doddle, although the routine can be a bit boring.

Lisbonlegend Posted on 22/07/2008 08:25
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I may have enough info to do a blurb now, wdb!

wee_daft_boris Posted on 22/07/2008 08:34
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That would mean weeks of gentle, submliminal hinting would have come to fruition then Lisbon!